Heidi get fwightened

Litta Heidi was sitting in de lounge woom wif evewybody watching dat telebishun.
She see a stowy about a bad person what get a knife and go and hurt somebody wif it.
De policeman look in de kitchen and he say "There is a knife missing. The murderer must have taken it."
Heidi jump up on de bench in our kitchen and see where our knives go in de knife fing.
She come and say "OOOh Unca Bernie Thome bad manth cometh and taketh lotth of kniveth and dem ith going to come and get uth."
Poor litta Heidi she vewy fwightened.
Bernie say "Oh don't wowwy litta Heidi. Nobody take dem knives. Dem knives is in de dwawer or maybe dem got lost." And den me give her a lick and a cuddle and she not fwightened any more.
Luv fwom Bernie

Oh dat a high up pantwy!

My Mummy tell me all about where de butler pantwy going to be.
She say dat in de laundwy we has a speshul cupboard for all de pussy cat fings.
She tell me where it is and it be a high up cupboard. She say Bernie is a clever pussy cat and him can jump up on dat bench. Miaowmmmmpph!
Me wants a pwoper butler pantwy.
Me going to tell Gwand-ma.
Me hope all my fwends will put a comments saying Bernie should have a pwoper butler pantwy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Dem Days goes quick

Me always has to wait until my Gwand-ma go to bed before me can wite my blog.
My Mummy say she going to get a litta 'puter for Bernie so he can wite his blog and do not have to wait for anyone. But she did not get it yet.
When she get it, me will ask her if she can take a nice pikcha of Bernie witing on his own 'puter  so we can put it on my blog.
Today was a "where dey all gone suddenly" day. We had visitors and den all of a sudden evewybody gone. My Mummy gone to School and my Gwand-da and my Gwand-ma gone to Wagga.
Oh well, me is de butler so me sits out dere on de gwass and waits for people to come home.
And Oh you know what? Me was looking in a book and it said dat Butlers should have dem own pantwy. A pantwy is where you keeps all de din dins. Dat a vewy dood idea. Bernie ask his Mummy if he will have his vewy own butler's pantwy in dat new house. She say she do not know but she is going to ask my Gwand-ma for me and she say she sure dat cos me is a vewy dood butler, me should have my vewy own butlers pantwy.
Me vewy happy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Diffwent pussy cat language

Today litta Heidi and me meet a diffwent pussy cat.
He say "Miaow" which mean "Where is de tomato sauce"
We say "Miaow " which mean "We does not know."
Den him say "miaow" again what mean "Where is de tomato sauce"
We say "Miaow" which mean "We told you we does not know where dat tomato sauce is"
Den him say "Miaow Miaow" vewy vewy loud which mean - you knows what dat mean doesn't you? It mean "Get off my tail".
Just den our dood fwend  called Wosy wot lives next door comes along and says "Maa" Dat means "Hello" We say "Maa" back to her.
Den she say "Mow, mow, miaow" which means "Has you met this nice new pussy cat called Simon? He is a Siamese cat and he talks Siamese pussy cat language."
We say "Yes we twy to meet him but he just say "Where is the tomato sauce" and "get off my tail".
Wosy laugh and she say "No dat siamese pussy cat for Hello I am new here"
Den Wosy say "What did you say back to him?" and we tell her.
She say "Oh dear in siamese pussy cat language dat means "You has a kangaroo sitting on your head"
She tell de new Siamese pussy cat what we was twying to say and we all laughing about dat.
When we gone home litta Heidi say to me "Oh Unca Bernie, I wath very worried becauthe I do not know what tomato thauthe ith tho I do not know where it ith either."
So me pwomise her me will show her what tomato sauce is and where it lives so next time dat pussy cat say "Miaow" to her wot means "Where is the tomato sauce?" she can tell him.
Luv fwom Bernie

Dis was witten yesserday

Dis blog was weally witten yesserday.
Me being a vewy dood pussy cat. You know about dat cute litta pussy cat what lives here called Heidi? Well she do not know her name dood.
Bernie always knows his name when someone say Bernie even if dem is not calling Bernie, Bernie still know dat is his name.
Well Heidi do not know her name vewy dood so my Mummy ask me to help teach her what her name is.
Me twying vewy hard but Oh cat it is hard for a pussy cat to teach a human word. Me twying to say it but it always comes out Miaow.
Oh well dat dont matter. Me calls her miaow or mew and she knows I mean her so dat alwight.
Love fwom Bernie

A sunny waining day

Today it was a waining day but a sunny day.  Dat sky could not decide what it want to do. Bernie see dem floods on de telebishon and now we fwightened dat dem floods might come here if it keeps being a waining day. So Heidi and me look for a dood place to climb up to if dem floods come.
Some mans come wif a vewy dood fing. It is a twactor wif a litta woom on a long stick and dey lift dat litta woom up high to de top of de twees.
Dem mans was fixing de post out de fwont of our house.
Heidi say we should go and get in dat woom if a big flood come but dem mans gone away and dey take dat litta high up woom wif dem.
But it would not be a dood place because we do not know how to put our din dins bowl in dat litta woom.
Now we has to find somewhere else.
Luv fwom Bernie

Bernie could not wite in his blog

Oh Miaow miaow,
Bernie could not wite in his blog for a vewy long long time.
Dat because my Gwand-ma go away and she turn off her 'puter.
Den Bernie find his Mummy 'puter and me wite on my blog wif dat 'puter. Den my Mummy gone away and she take her puter away.
So what Bernie do den?
Bernie twy to use Gwand-da 'puter but me do not know de password.
Me vewy sad cos me wants to wite in my blog evewy day for my dood fwend called Hughie wot is my best fwend in de whole world.
My Mummy tell me dat she will get a litta puter for Bernie to use and so me can always wite in my blog.
Dat make me vewy happy.
Luv fwom Bernie