Contributors

Saturday 10 October 2015

Jaffa is a bit mixed up

Yesserday Jaffa caught a birdie and eat it. She left the feathers and yukkie bits on the lounge woom floor.
Gwand-da cleaned it up.
Now today she caught another bird and she left lots of feather evewywhere again.
Bernie said "Jaffa you should not be catching those little birdies. You should let them keep flying awound and singing birdie songs"
Jaffa said "But they are tweety birds and Gwand-ma always gives us tweats when we are good pussy cats"
Bernie had to tell her that it is a diffwent sort of tweat. Tweats what Gwand-ma gives are tweats. That is diffwent to tweetie birds."
Oh how can Bernie explain that to his little sister pussy cat?"

Thursday 1 October 2015

A sore bum

Bernie has a vewy sore bum.
A naughty big pussy cat came to our house and walked on our woof.
Bernie say "Go away you naughty pussy cat. Dis is Bernie and Jaffa house"
But that naughty pussy cat wun after Bernie and say "Me wants this house for my house" and that naughty pussy cat bit Bernie on de bum.
Now Bernie bum got vewy sore. Bernie had to go and see my new Aunty Nicole what is my new vet since Uncle Jim gone away. My new Aunty Nicole look at it and she say Bernie needs a opewation to fix it.
So she give Bernie a needle what make Bernie go to sleep and then when Bernie wake up it is all fixed but me has a tube sticking out my bum and it bleeding and yukky and me not allowed outside.
My Aunty Nicole say that Bernie is a good pussy cat because me has had all my injections and so me do not get a howwible sickness fwom dat naughty cat.
Jaffa say "Boor Bernie. Next time you see that naughty cat you tell Jaffa and she will come and help you to send him away. Then he will see there is two pussy cats here and we bofe chase him away togevver."
Bernie keeps saying to my Mummy "OOh Mummy my bummy is cwummy"
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday 13 September 2015

A Vewy Important Investigation

We has got a leak in our kitchen cupboard. The floor of tht cupboard under the sink gets vewy wet.
Gwand-ma wanted to find out where that leak is coming fwom so she dwied it wif a towel and then she spwinkled talcum powder all over it.
Bernie and Jaffa vewy kindly offered to help her.
Well we did not weally offer. We just decided to help her.
We bofe helped. We checked up on each uvver.
We wanted it to be a pwoper investigation. Pwoper investigations are done double blind. So that means we bofe shut our eyes tight.
Den we went in de cupboard and had a dood look. It is vewy hard to have a dood look wif your eyes shut but it vewy important to do de investigation as a double blind investigation so we did.
Then we walked out and all awound. Pussy cats can smell fings so we was OK.
Here is our wesult:

Dat talcum powder tastes yuk!

We do not charge Gwand-ma for our expert opinion. We does it for luv.
Luv fwom Bernie.
Here is a picture of our investigation.

Thursday 27 August 2015

A New Pussy

We has got a new pussy. It is a diffwent pussy to Bernie and Jaffa. Bernie and Jaffa are pussy cats. Dat is we are caty type pusses. Dis new pussy is a platy type pussy what is called a platypus. He came to see our pond what got filled up wif water cos it wained and wained and wained. Bernie fink him must have come up from de big big pond down de end of de stweet.
Gwand-ma say him would not be able to find any dindins in our pond. Him likes to eat worms. We got lots of worms in our garden so he can get some fwom dere. And Jaffa and Bernie said dat him can have some of our pussy cat dinner.
My Gwand-ma take a picture. Him got out of our pond and him was just going to get back in.
Here is de picture.


Luv fwom Bernie
PS. My Mummy say him name is Bob but Bernie and Jaffa finks dat is a silly name for a platypus. We calls him Pat cos we do not know if it is a girl platypus or a boy platypus.

Thursday 13 August 2015

That book is finished

My mummy has been witing a vewy important book. It has lots of witing and lots of bootiful pictures.
My fwend Aunty Sam (what has got a pwoper name called Samantha) came over to our place to help her and my Gwand-da helped too.
It taked a long time and Bernie helped too. Bernie was vewy busy sitting on de puter when my Mummy was typing. I was keeping those little numbers and letters warm cos it is a cold Winter here.
That book is going to be on the internet so evewybody can wead it. My Mummy might tell evewybody where to get it on the internet cos Bernie do not know.
Now it is finished and my mummy is glad cos it was lots of hard work and she is sick of it.
Evewybody say she do a vewy vewy good job and Bernie do a good job too.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday 1 August 2015

Feathers for my Mummy's pillow

Jaffa's and Bernie's Mummy has a feather pillow. She said that she needs more feathers for it and she do not know where to get them. Silly Mummy. Jaffa knows where to get them so she did. She caught a vewy big birdie and bwing it inside. She do not hurt it and we do not eat it. We just get lots of feathers off it. Then our Mummy come and see it and bwing it out the door and it fly away. But we got lots of feathers.
Then silly Mummy sweep them up and put them in the bin. Such a silly Mummy. Those feather were for your pillow!!!
Good gwief!
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday 26 July 2015

Bernie wites all the news fwom a long time

My Unca Tim keeps complaining that Bernie did not wite in my blog for a long time. So now Bernie is going to wite all the news.
First Bernie is getting a bit fat again but not too fat. That is because Bernie is a vewy good pussy cat and I always takes my tablets vewy good when my Gwand-ma or my Mummy gives them to me.
Jaffa is gwowing into a fat pussy cat but she did not gwow out of her fur coat yet so Gwand-ma said that is OK. We do not know where we could buy her a new pussy cat coat if she gwew out of the one she has on now.
Jaffa does a funny thing sometimes. I asked her what she was doing and she said she was having some dindins at differwent westaurwants. But weally all she does is this. She eats some dindins from her bowl and then she goes to the fwont door and Gwand-da lets her out. Then she walks wound the house and she comes in the cat flap in the family woom and she goes and eats some more dindins and then she goes to the fwont door and Gwand-da lets her out and then she walks wound the house and comes in the cat flap in the family woom and then she eats some more dindins and then she goes to the fwont door and Gwand-da says "What again?" and he lets her out and she keeps doing that. Gwand-da counted four times yesterday. Bernie asked her why she do that and that is when she said she is going to differwent westaurwants. She is a silly cat because she is only going to the same place every time.
Did Bernie tell evewybody about our big fish pond what is going to have fishies in it? Well we got a big one and it wained and now it is full of bwown water but no fishies. My Gwand-ma said we has to get that dirty water out and only put clean water in and then we can get some fishies. When we have fishies in it, some birdies might come and sit near the edge and twy to catch them fishies to eat. So Bernie and Jaffa will have the vewy important job of chasing dem birdies away so they do not eat our fishies.
It has been waining here lots of times and the gwound is all wet and squishy. Bernie does not bovver to go outside cos it is cold. Bernie stays inside and sleeps on Polly's blankie what she left to Bernie when she gone to Pussy cat Heaven. It is a vewy nice blankie and Bernie loves it lots. It weminds me of my Polly what Bernie loves.
Jaffa goes outside and comes in wet and then she gets a cuddle fwom someone to get warmed up. She is silly but she still loves Bernie. She gives her Bernie lots of lick licks and she tickles.
Love fwom Bernie

Thursday 23 April 2015

Bernie is sick

Gwand-ma told Bernie dat me should wite on my blog and tell evewyone about Bernie being sick so they know why Bernie did not wite on my blog for a long time.
Bernie keeps getting thinner and thinner. Gwand-ma took me to the vet but Unca Jim said Bernie is OK. Then Unca Jim died and Bernie was vewy sad. Now we has a new vet called Aunty Nicole. My Aunty Vicki is still at the vet place.
Gwand-ma took little Bernie to see his Aunty Nicole and she said Bernie vewy sick and she do a blood test which is a fing what Bernie did not like.
Bernie has got a over active thywoid and it makes Bernie eat lots cause me is hungwy but me just get skinny all de time.
Bernie has to have two tablets evewy day now for de west of my life.
My Gwand-ma put them in a little pill container just like my Gwand-ma and my Gwand-da and my Mummy has got. Bernie is a EXCELLENT pussy cat and me takes my tablets vewy dood.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday 10 February 2015

Jaffa's Birfday

Yesserday was Jaffa's birfday. She was 2 years old. If she was a human bean she would be 21. First Gwand-ma singed happy birfday to Jaffa. Den Bernie singed "miaowy miaow day". Jaffa fink dat is vewy funny and she larf and larf. When she larf, her bell wings. Dat makes her larf more. Dat makes her bell wing more and dat makes her larf more. And dat makes her bell wing more and dat makes her larf more and den she get de hiccups. Dat stopped de larfin. So den she wun into de sewing woom. Katy bed is still dere so Jaffa likes to sleep on it so she can wemember Katy smell so she will wemember Katy next time Katy comes to visit. She had a nice sleep on dat bed.
She will not be happy today cos Gwand-da say he is going to put dat bed back in de gawage. Poor Jaffa. She wants to keep sleeping on it. Maybe someone will make her a speshul bed in dere.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday 2 February 2015

Katy gone home

My Katy came to visit. Bernie did not do my blog for a long time because I forgot my password. Now Gwand-ma weminded me what it is.
We had dood fun wif Katy visiting. Jaffa has been getting to know her. Jaffa does not like new people but she likes Katy. Katy knew just how to pat her and talk to her gently so she will get to know her and do not be fwightened.
Now I have to tell Jaffa dat Katy has gone home. I hope she do not cwy.
Katy has gone in dat new car what was here. Katy said it is called Clive and it is going to be her Daddy's car so they are dwiving it all the way to Tasmania and they are going over the water in a boat. Bernie VEWY GLAD that he does not have to go wif them because Bernie do not like going in a boat.
Gwand-ma went in hospital and came out again fast.
Gwand-da is sad now cos Katy and my Mummy is gone. Bernie has to give him lots of cuddles.
Bernie let Katy bwing my favourwite toy to give it to my cousin Q. Gwand-ma will have to buy a new one for Bernie.
Now Bernie has to go a do cuddles.
Luv fwom Bernie