Sunday, 29 December 2013

Uncle Tim and Aunty Lily gone home

Well you know what de news is. Dem visitors has gone home.
We had a dood Kwismus and Jaffa got lots of playing toys and Bernie got some nice Tweats. Me also got some playing toys but me let Jaffa play wif dem.
Bernie is a gwowd up pussy and me do not play wif toys what is for baby pussy kittens.
Today we make a nice gween house for de Wawatahs. Dem do not like bwight sun and hot.
Gwand-da and Uncle Tim put a new awning on de window of de guest woom cos it get too hot in de mornings. So now it got a nice awning what is just de wight colour and matches our house dood.
Now if Bernie goes in dere for a little west sometimes, me will not be too hot.
Now Bernie is going to have a little snack.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 25 December 2013

It is Kwismus (Yawn)

Well dat Kwismus Twee look vewy pwetty wif lots of pwessies. Bernie decide dat me like dat Kwismus twee and all dem pwessies so dat will be Bernie's Kwismus Twee and pwessies.
So you know what pussy cats does when dey wants to tell evewybody dat sumfing belong to dem?
So Bernie do a little wee wight in de middle of de pwessies and evewybody say "Oh Bernie don't do that" and dey gwab me wight in de missle of my wee!!!
Oooooh!  DON'T DO DAT!
Den my Mummy wipe dem pwessies what was one fwom Bernie and Jaffa to our Mummy and one from Gwand-ma to my Mummy,
She say "And they are both my presents too you naughty pussy cat"
And den she make Bernie and Jaffa go out of de lounge woom and she shut de door so Bernie and Jaffa has a sad Kwismus. But my Mummy say dat Santa bwing some pwessies for us so we are allowed to open dem later.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 19 December 2013

Jaffa can hide vewy well

Yesserday Jaffa was outside and my Mummy and my Gwand-ma wants to go sumwheres so dem wants to put Jaffa inside before dem gone.
My Mummy was calling "Jaffa" vewy loudly but Jaffa do not come.
Den my Mummy hear a noise and dere was Jaffa sitting wite near where she was in the middle of de wose garden but no one can see her  because she is de same colour as de stuff on de gwound what is called tan bark.
Jaffa is a vewy clever hiding pussy cat. She is even better dan Heidi.
Today Jaffa went outside early for a little play. She come inside and go into de guest woom when Gwand-ma gone in dere. When Gwand-ma come out she shut dat door cos she do not know Jaffa is in dere.
Den later on she was calling Jaffa to come for lunch. She was calling and calling and gone awound outsiude and calling and looking under de woses and evewywhere. Den she come back inside and she can hear a little meow coming fwom de guest woom. When Gwand-,ma open dat door, out wuns Jaffa.
Bernie and Jaffa was vewy pleased to see each uvver. We keep giving each uvver lots of licking kisses to say "Oh I missed you"  Den we had our dindins and we had a little play togever. We played chasings and pouncings what is our favourwite game to play togever.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 17 December 2013

A Silly Chook

Bernie found Gwand-ma looking in de miwwor and wiggling her nose.
"Miaow" says Bernie. Dat means "Why are you doing dat?"
Gwand-ma say "Katy and Hughie might be visiting us at Easter time so I am practising"
"Miaow Mow"  says Bernie. That means "What for?"
 Gwand-ma Say "Well we might have an Easter Egg Hunt and who do you think puts all the Easter eggs there in the garden for people to find?"
Bernie say "Miaow"  That means "A silly Chook?"
"No of course not!" says Gwand-ma. "They are left there by the Easter Bunny"
Bernie just say "Miaow Miaowmow mow" what means "That Easter Bunny thing is a big joke"
 But Gwand-ma say "I know. I am just practising to be the Easter Bunny"
Bernie say "Miaow" what means "Oh Goodo" and den me say to Jaffa "  Miaow mow Miaow" what means "See I told you a silly old chook puts them there."
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 15 December 2013

Bernie helps wif Embwoidewy

My Gwand-ma is doing some pwetty embwoidewy for de church for Kwismus. She wanted to make de witing look pwettier. She did not know what to do. Den she got a dood idea and when she do dat it look vewy pwetty. My Gwand-ma say "Thank you Bernie for giving me the idea of how to make it look pretty. It was just something you said that gave me the right idea."
Bernie say "What did me say?":
And den we twying to fink wot dat clever fing was dat Bernie say.
Den me say to Gwand-ma "Was it when me say Miaow?"
And she say "Oh yes! That's what it was!. You just gave me the right idea. Thankyou Bernie"
So Bernie is vewy happy because me help wif de embwoidewy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 13 December 2013

Lights at our house

When my Uncle Timmy was visiting, him and my Gwand-da put up some lights to twinkle at de fwont of our house for Kwismus. Dem is pwetty but not as pwetty as de house acwoss de woad.
Bernie is going to ask my Mummy if we can go for a walk and look at all de houses wot got twinkley lights and take some pikchas so me can put dem on my blog.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Sunday, 8 December 2013

Visitors

Yesserday my Uncle Timmy and my Aunty Lily wot Bernie loves come to visit. Dem sleep in de guest woom and dem still here today and den dem went home today.
Bernie likes to see dem so me vewy happy.
Jaffa do not know dem vewy dood yet so she a bit fwightened.
Lily fwightened of her too cos Aunty Lily is not used to pussy cats. She gets fwightened when dem comes near her.
Gwand-ma say dat because she did not hav e a pussy cat to play wif when she was a little girl. Dat is vewy sad. Evewybody should have a pussy cat to play wif when dem is little. Dat what pussy cats is for. We are vewy dood at being weal life toys for childwen.
Evewybody talking about how dem is going to go and visit my Katy and my Hughie next year when it is Kwismus but what Bernie and Jaffa do? Bernie will cwy if dem go wifout us but Bernie do not like dwiving in  a car so maybe Bernie and Jaffa will have a dood holiday somewhere here.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 6 December 2013

Kwismus Twee

Yesserday was my Mummy birfday. Happy Birfday to my Mummy.
Today we are allowed to put up de Kwismus Twee. We is not allowed to do anyfing about Kwismus until after my Mummy birfday so today we put up de Kwismus Twee. It vewy bootiful. Here is a pikcha of Bernie looking at dat twee. Me sit dere and look at it for a long time. It not finished yet. It going to get a Angel on top and some blue bows.
Luv fwom Bernie.




Monday, 2 December 2013

Twicking Jaffa

When my Gwand-ma go to de supermarket, Bernie go outside and hide somewhere.
When she come home and open up dat gawage door, Bernie wun into de gawage and when Gwand-ma get out of de car, Bernie jump up in it.
Den Gwand-ma get de shopping out of de boot and bwing it inside and Bernie stay in de car.
Den Jaffa come into de gawage and she see Bernie in de car.
She say "Did you go to the supermarket with Grand-ma?"
And Bernie say "Yes, Me buy lots of pussy cat dindins."
And Jaffa say "Oooh you are a clever big brother pussy cat"  But den Bernie larf and larf because me do not want to to tell a fib to my little sister so me say "No me just twicking you" and den Jaffa larf too.
Luv fwom Bernie

Fix Dat Window

Dere is a window wot goes into our bootiful kitchen. It is near dat sink where evewybody wash up. Bernie jumps up on de Barbecue what is outside dat window in de patio and me says Miaow so sumone will open dat window and let Bernie come inside.
Evewybody always just says "Bernie come in the cat door" or dey just go and open dat kitchen door and say "Come on Bernie you can't go in that way. Come in here"
Now Bernie know dat lots of windows lets someone go fwough. Dere is a bootiful window in my Mummy bedwoom what evewybody can go  fwough. But dat silly window in de Kitchen must be bwoke.
Do anybody know how Bernie can find someone who is clever and can fix dat window?
Luv fwom  Bernie

Sunday, 24 November 2013

We got a visitor

My Mummy cousin wot is called Jacki came to visit. She is like my Mummy but she nawwower and got differwent colour hair.
Jacki and my Mummy talks and talks and talks and giggles and giggles.
Dem gone sumwhere yesserday and come home wif yukky fings and den dem all gone out to have dindins in a noo place.
Ho hum.
Jacki got a vewy nice handbag. Bernie has been sitting on it and smelling it.
Bernie can find out lots about a person fwom deir hand bag.
Jaffa is fwightened of Jacki but me tell her "Don't be fwightened cos she is our cousin too and she is a  nice cousin"
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 22 November 2013

My clever Mummy

My Mummy is a vewy clever Mummy and today she go to school in a speshul costume. It be a speshul day when people wear speshul cloves.
Dem all gets dwessed up as super hewos because dem all is super clever.
My Mummy be a sekwet super hewo called Captain Question.
My Gwand-ma even do her hair to look like a question. Here is some pikchas of my Mummy dwessed in her super Captain Question cloves.
And you can see how pwetty my Mummy is in de last pikcha.
Luv fwom Bernie.





Saturday, 16 November 2013

Vale Bwwwww

Today we hear some vewy sad news. My vewy dood fwend Brrrr wot Bernie calls Bwwwww has died.
Him was 16 years old which is like 80 years old for a human. Brr is survived by his vewy nice Mummy wot is my Aunty Barbi. Brrr and me was vewy dood fwends.
Last time Brr came to see me we did not see each uvver for 18 munths before dat but as soon as Bernie and Brrr see each uvver we wun up and say hello wif a nose kiss.
Dat is because we do  not forget our vewy dood fwends.
Brr was getting a bit sick. Him had arfritis and  bung kidneys but him was OK. Den yesserday he just go and lie down on de nice gwass at his house and him decide to have a nice sleep dere and den him died.
Him find a vewy nice comfy place to die and him fwends de wallabies say bye bye to him.
Dat why he die dere. It so him fwends will know where him gone.
Bernie will find some nice pikchas of my dood fwend Brrr and put dem on dis blog.
Love fwom vewy sad Bernie.








Thursday, 14 November 2013

Nuffing

Nuffing vewy interwesting happen today. Me had a sleep in fwont of de fwigerwater but dat was not interwesting. Evewybody keep nearly twipping over me. Dat a noosance. Go de uvver way. Can't you see Bernie is having a sleep?
Gwand-da talk on de phone lots but dat is just de same as evewy day.
Maybe my dood fwend Jacki come to visit. Dat will be dood.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 12 November 2013

Waspbewwy Bumps

De uvver day Bernie and my Gwand-ma was waterwing de garden and we notice bumps on de waspbewwy plant.
Gwand-ma ask Bernie if me can see what dem is. We bofe looking closely but we can't see if dem is little gween waspbewwies or little flower buds. Maybe my Mummy will know.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 9 November 2013

Bernie getting sick

Bernie getting sick. Me keeps bomitting up all my dindins. Gwand-da say Bernie eat too much dindins and it do not fit in Bernie tummy but dat not twue. Bernie can't help it. Maybe when my Mummy come home she will make Bernie get better. Me luv my Mummy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 7 November 2013

Bernie is good but de mushwooms is bad.

Today Gwand-da wouse at Bernie for doing a wee in de pantwy. But Gwand-da wowwied because Bernie wee is vewy dark bwown. Den Gwand-da find out it not Bernie doing a wee. It de mushwooms box leaking. We twying to gwow mushwooms in a white box in de pantwy.
Gwand-da say "Sorry Bernie, it was not your fault. But I am glad you do not have a problem with your wee."
Den dis evening Bernie want to go outside so me do my message of scwatching de couch wot means "Bernie wants to go outside"
Gwand-ma say "Don’t do that Bernie. It ruins the furniture. If you want to go outside, go to the front door and say Miaow”
So den Bernie walk vewy politely to de fwont door and me sit dere and say "Miaow"  just like Gwand-ma tell me to.
Den she say "Oh Bernie you are a good pussy cat." and she open dat door stwaight away for Bernie.
You see Bernie knows what peoples say and me can do what dem tell me if me want to.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 4 November 2013

Showing Ollie how to do it

Today we was all out in de garden and a little fwend called Isabelle and her Mummy come to talk to us. Dem lives acwoss de woad fwom us. Den dat little puppy dog what live wif dem come to visit too. Dat puppy dog is called Ollie.
Bernie meow at him but not vewy much cos we is getting to know each uvver. Se we just gwowl a little bit.'Den Ollie go and do a poop on our gwass but him do not cover it up like a dood pussy cat do. Him Mummy has to cover it up for him.
So you know what? Bernie go and do a big poop too. And Bernie do a MUCH BIGGER POOP  dan Ollie and den me cover it up
and me cover it up
and me cover it up
and den Bernie cover it up again.
And Gwand-ma say "Oh good grief Bernie you have covered it up enough. Ollie saw you. Stop showing off".
Se me went away and find somewhere else to sit.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 3 November 2013

Swimming

My Hughie is learning how to swim. He is de cleverwest boy in Tasmania. Bernie can't swim and me is like a 64 year old person and my Hughie is only nearly 6. But maybe if him gets to be 6 him is gwowing up and him wants to learn how to swim so him won't get dwownded.
Bernie do not even like it when Gwand-ma spway dat hose on  Bernie. Me wun away fast. Me fwightened me will get dwownded in de hose.
When my Hughie can swim maybe him will teach Bernie and den Bernie will not be fwightened.
Do me need to get a little pair of swimming pants?
Luv fwom Bernie


Saturday, 2 November 2013

Chasing butterflies

My Hughie can chase butterflies. When Jaffa chase dem she jump up in de air fwee times higher dan her head and den she turn awound in de middle of de air and twies to fly. But she is a pussy cat and she can't fly. But she do look clever doing her ballet dancing. Gwand-ma say she might make a little tutu for her and take a pikcha of her doing dat chasing and put it on Utube and say it is a ballet dancing pussy cat. Hmmmph! Sounds like too much work. Why bovver?
It is getting hot and some of our new flowers goes all floppy so we has to give dem a little  big dwink.
Now Bernie is going to go and see if my Mummy comes home yet.
Luv fwom Bernie
PS Yesserday Bernie could not get outside so me did a wee in Gwand-ma shoe. Hee hee she get a big surpwise when she put her foot in it.  Squelsh!  Anyway she do not like dem shoes. Dem is old. Now she can buy new ones.

Friday, 1 November 2013

Dat would be funny

Yesserday Jaffa and me was outside in de side garden. Bernie was having a nice little west under de big Kuwwajong twee and just den two MagPies came and sit on de fence. Bernie say y-y-y-y-y-y-y which is de fing wot means birdies in cat language. Jaffa look up and she see dem too. Den dat silly cat fink she is going to pounce on dem and get dem.
She was cwouching down weady to pounce and she was wiggling her little bum and waving her tail fwom side to side getting weady to pounce. Bernie fink "Ho hum"  cos if she do pounce on dem big MagPies she get a big surpwise won't she?
Dem MagPies might eat her up for deir dindins.
But soon dem MagPies fly up into de twee and den dat little Jaffa can't see dem any more so she go back to chasing butterflies.
Luv fwom Bernie


Monday, 28 October 2013

Some visitors

Today we have some visitors but dem do not stay vewy long at our house.
It be my Aunty Debbie and Uncle Gweg. Dem is de Mummy and Daddy of my dood fwend Joel wot stay wif us when him putting tiles in our new house.
Aunty Debbie give Bernie some very nice head scwatches and cuddles.  Dem is vewy nice peoples and Bernie say dat dem can come and visit whenever dem likes.
Our catmint has bootiful flowows on it and it is de pwettiest plant in de back yard. My Gwand-ma pick some of dem pwetty flowows and put dem in a vase wif sweet peas.
Luv fwom Bernie


Sunday, 27 October 2013

A dood idea about pussy cat birfdays

Pussy cats gwows four times as fast as humans. So when Bernie is twelve me is weally like 64 for a human.
It goes like dis. When a pussy cat is one year old dat is like a hguman wot is fifteen. When a pussy cat is two years old dat is like a human wot is 24.  Den we gwows 4 years evewy year so now when Bernie 12 me is like a human wot is 64. So dat means dat if all my dood fwends want to know when my birfday is dem can give me pwesents on de 14th of Januawy wot is de same day as my Uncle Paul's birfday. Me will be like a human being 65 den. And den me has annuvver birfday on 14th Apwil and annuvver birfday on 14th July and den my wegular birfday on 14th October.
So do not wowwy if you forgot dat birfday cos me has  lots.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 21 October 2013

Fankyous

Fankyou to all of dese kind peoples what give Bernie a bootiful birfday pwesent:
Gwand-ma.    Gwand-ma give Bernie a bootiful little statue of a echidna to put in him courtyard wot me share wif my Mummy. My Mummy has a turtle in dat courtyard and now Bernie have a echidna.
Jaffa:    jaffa give Bernie a speshul birfday lick and she do not even know what a birfday is so Bernie tell her.
Bernie did not get any more birfday pwesents.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 12 October 2013

Annuvver fing about Birfdays

Bernie wemember sumfing else about birfdays.
If anyone wants to give Bernie a nice birfday card wif dem pwesent, dat OK. Bernie eat dat too.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 11 October 2013

Bernie's Birfday Soon

Soon it be Bernie's Birfday. Bernie will be 12 years old. If Bernie be a human person, me would be 64 years old. Dat is nearly as old as my Gwand-ma. Dat is older dan my Mummy.
How can somebody be older dan dem Mummy? Dat silly.
Anyway, evewybody will be wanting to know what to give bernie for a Birfday pwesent so me wite a list for dem.  Evewybody do not need to give Bernie EVEWYFING on dis list. Only some fings is good. Bernie is not a gweedy Pussy cat.
Here is de list:
10 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif fishies in it
12 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif beef in it
 8 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif sardines in it
20 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif chookie in it
15 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif mackewel in it
12 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif tuna in it
14 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif lamb in it
10 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif salmon in it
12 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif pwawns in it
12 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif steak in it
10 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif duck in it
  9 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif shwimp in it
12 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif pork in it
11 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif kangawoo in it
10 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif liver in it
 6 tins of yummy pussy cat dindins wif oysters in it
 3 cartons of yummy pussy cat milk
10 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif fishies in it
12 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif beef in it
 8 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif sardines in it
20 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif chookie in it
15 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif mackewel in it
12 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif tuna in it
14 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif lamb in it
10 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif salmon in it
12 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif pwawns in it
12 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif steak in it
10 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif duck in it
  9 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif shwimp in it
12 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif pork in it
11 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif kangawoo in it
10 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif liver in it
 6 sachets of yummy pussy cat dindins wif oysters in it 
Bernie do not mind if people do not put vewy pwetty wapping paper on him birfday pwesents. Me can easy undo wapping paper wot is not so pwetty but Bernie knows dat all him fwends luvs Bernie so much dat dem will all want to put pwetty wapping paper on. So dat is OK. 
Bernie will put speshul fankyous to evewybody on him blog.
Luv fwom Bernie


A night time visitor

Last night dat gwey cat what sometimes wander awound come inside our house fwough de dat door in de laundwy.
It a clever pussy cat cos it knows about cat doors.
It bleedin lots of blood evewywhere.
It wun in de barfwoom and jump up on de window sill.
It put blood in de barf and on de walls and de floor and de window sill.
My Gwand-ma have a look. It do not like anyone to come vewy close to it so Bernie and Jaffa just watching fwom out de door.
My Mummy give it some of our dindins and a dwink of our water.
My Gwand-ma talk soft so him do not be fwightened but it still gwowling. My Gwand-ma say she finks it get wunned over by a car cos it got its paws hurt like pussy cats do when dem get hit my a car.
We leave de cat flap open so it can go home if it wants to and duwing de night it decide to go home so now we do not know where it is.
Bernie will let evewybody know de news when we find out what happened.
Luv fwom Bernie


Thursday, 10 October 2013

Where dat big snake gone?

My Aunty Ollie what lives acwoss de woad fwom me find a big snake skin in her fwont garden wite near her letter box.
A big snake leave it dere when it gwow a new skin.
Snakes can gwow a new skin when dem get too big for dat uvver skin.
It alweady a big skin so dat snake must be a giant snake.
Oh no, Little Jaffa, Do not go outside. Bernie is vewy careful when me go outside. Please evewybody be vewy careful when you goes near dem big weeds.
Maybe dat naughty big snake will twy and get some eggs what Uncle Mark's chook lay and it will get caught in de speshul mesh what Uncle Mark put dere to pwotect him chooks.
Maybe we needs to get some of dat speshul mesh to protect our place.
But dont wowwy. If Bernie see dat snake, Bernie will get him fast.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 5 October 2013

Watching my little sister

When my Mummy and my Gwand-da and my Gwand-ma goes outside to do some gardening, little Jaffa is allowed outside too.
Dis morning Gwand-ma come out on her own wif just me and Jaffa so she put a little weins on Jaffa and tie a wope to it and tie dat wope to de chair what Gwand-ma sit on. Little Jaffa did not complain. She just sit wif us in de shade and watching Gwand-ma. Bernie stay dere wif her so she will not twy to wun away.
Den later evewybody outside and so little Jaffa  did not have her weins on. She can wun awound de yard.
Bernie keep watching her and whenever my Mummy say "Bernie where is Jaffa?" Bernie look stwaight at her and dat show my Mummy where she is.
Bernie told people before in him blog dat pussy cats look at somefing to show you where it is. Dat is how pussy cats point to it. We do not point a little paw.
But Bernie is vewy dood. Me keep watching dat little pussy cat what is my little sister. And Bernie always knows where she is so me can tell my Mummy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 30 September 2013

Me awake now

Dood Dwief,
Bernie was blogging while him was asleep.
Me is vewy clever.
But Bernie is awake now but poor Bernie is vewy tired.
Gwand-ma and Gwand-da was tidying up de patio and de parfs and de back yard and Bernie sit dere on dat Barbecue and watch dem de whole time until dem was working in de backyard and den me went awound dere and watch dem in de back yard and me is  tired fwom all dat watching.
Jaffa go outside for a little while but den she wun inside cos she say it too hard work for a little pussy cat.
So now Bernie goes to have him din dins and den go to sleep.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 29 September 2013

Bloggin while me is asleep

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Me dweaming about my blog.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ  achoo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Thursday, 26 September 2013

Eating de stuff fwom de garden

Today my Mummy pick some of dem peas. Den she cwack dem open and get dem out and you know what? Dem is de same as dem fings what my Mummy buy in de supermarket but dem is not in a cold and fweezing plastic bag.
How do dem get out of dat plastic bag and into dem little gween coats and sitting on de plants in our garden?
Den my Mummy cook dem and she let Bernie taste one but Yuk Bernie do not like it. My Mummy and my Gwand-ma fink dem taste vewy nice.
We also eat some cauliflower out of de garden. My Mummy make some cheese sauce to put on it and Bernie love dat cheese sauce. So do Jaffa but our Mummy say we should not eat too much of it. We just allowed to have a tiny taste.
My Gwand-da was at a meeting so he did not taste his yet.
Maybe my Katy and my Hughie will know about peas getting out of plastic bags and onto plants.
Luv fwom Bernie


Wednesday, 25 September 2013

My Mummy home now

My Mummy come home dis afternoon. Bernie is vewy glad dat him Mummy is home.
My Mummy likes to visit my Uncle Tim and my Aunty Lily cos she luv dem too. My Uncle Tim is my Mummy big bwuvver just like Bernie is little Jaffa's big bwuvver. And my Aunty Lily is like a sort of sister for my Mummy cos my Mummy do not have a sister. Dat is like little Jaffa. She do not havce a sister. Maybe Bernie needs to find a Mrs. Bernie so she can be a sister for little Jaffa.
Hmmm dat a interwesting fing to fink about. Where me find dat?
Maybe me look on Google.
When my Mummy come home we show her how de wasbewwy plant is gwowing baby wasbewwy plants. And she have a look at de pwetty fings what Gwand-da made and put onto de bwick wall for de woses to gwow on. Dem is blue and dem is nice.
And we have a look and count how many stwawbewwies we got. We got lots. Bernie do not wemember how many cos Bernie do not know about numbers vewy dood.
One day when my Katy and my Hughie get on de puter, Bernie will look at de stwawbewwies and say "Dere is one" and "dere is one" and keep going until me point to all of dem and my Katy and my Hughie can count dem for me.
Is dat a dood idea?
Luv fwom Bernie



Tuesday, 24 September 2013

Planting baby flowows

Today Gwand-ma planted baby flowows. She teach me what dem called. She say "Bernie these are Zinnias".
She tell Bernie dat we got pink ones and purple ones and lots of diffwent colour ones.
She get dem speshul tways wif speshul dirt. Jaffa was watching too cos she do not know about gwowing flowows. Wont she get a big surpwise when dem gwow?
Jaffa say "Is Grand-ma making some speshul litter trays for us?"
Bernie say "Oh no  little Jaffa. Dem is not litter tways. Dem is tways for baby flowows and fings." Den me show Jaffa de big boxes where my Mummy gwow fiungs. Me say "Dat where dem gwow when dem big. When dem baby fings dem gwows in little tiny boxes cos dem little and tiny." Jaffa say "Is everything little and tiny when it is a baby?" and Bernie say "Yes except dinosaurs. Dem is big even when dem first get born. Den dem gwow up gigantic and huge."  Jaffa say "Oooh Bernie you are a very clever pussy cat because you know everything." and Bernie say "Yes me is de cleverwest pussy cat in de whole world."
And you know what? dere is a sad fing too. Today be Tilly birfday. She be one year old today.
We plant dem on Tilly birfday to wemember Tilly.
Love fwom Bernie.

Sunday, 22 September 2013

Mummy on a little hollemsday

My Mummy is having school hollemsdays and she gone to visit my Uncle Tim and Aunty Lily for a little hollemsday.
Bernie misss him Mummy.
Me look evewywhere for her and me saying Miaow weal loud and dat means "Where is you Mummy?"
Den my Gwand-ma tell me dat me can wite her a email so me do dat when me finished witing my blog.
Little Jaffa is allowed to go outside when Gwand-ma and Gwand-da is weeding de garden. She finks it is vewy exciting but she is still dood and wuns back inside like a dood pussy cat.
Yesserday my Aunty Kim come to visit and give Bernie a nice long cuddle.
My Aunty Mavis comes too and she give Bernie a little cuddle.
Bernie and Jaffa has to sleep in Gwand-ma and Gwand-da bedwoom when our Mummy is away. But sometimes we just sleeps wif each uvver.
My Mummy still did  not take a pikch of de gwass twee wif de flower spike but she can do dat when she come home.
De uvver spike ios gwowing too.
And guess what! We fink we might get a Wawatah because one of them is getting a big fing on de end of de stalk.  Dat will make my Gwand-ma vewy happy.
Bernie is happy cos dat CatMint is gwowing dood too.
Luv fwom Bernie





Saturday, 14 September 2013

In our garden

We got lots of fings in our garden.
We got a apple twee and a pear twee and a nectawine twee and a plum twee. De Nectawine twee and de plum twee has got pwetty flowows on dem.
Bernie likes dem flowowers better dan dat fwoot.
We got a lemon twee and a owange twee and a mandawine twee.
We got bwoccolli - some more is gwowing - and cabbage and cauliflowow. aznd cawwots and parsnips and wadishes and garlic and parsley and owegano and beetwoot and mint and speshul cat  mint and basil and chives and lots of stwawbewwies and lettuces and silver beet and bwoad beans and peas and shallotts and soon we is going to plant some corn. And we has got gwapes and wasbewwies.  Dat is a lot of fings.
And guess what!!!
We is all vewy happy because dem gwass twees what my Mummy give my Gwand-ma for Muvvers Day has got some spikes gwowing on dem.
 Bernie will ask my Mummy to take a pikcha of dem so me can show my blog weaders.
And today we was giving dem Wawatahs some dindins. It is vewy nice din dins and dem likes it vewy much and dem eat it all up. And den we give dem a nice dwink wif de hose.
And we lets little Jaffa come outside when we doing fings in de garden and she is good cos she do not wun away and she goes back inside herself and do not cwy.
And dat is all me can fink of now. And maybe Bernie left some fings out cos dem is lots of fings to wemember.
Luv fwom Bernie



Thursday, 5 September 2013

Me nearly forgot my blog

Bernie nearly forgot all about him blog. We been doing some gardening. We planted dem Wawatahs. Dem was sitting in pots in de middle of deir gardens and dem was getting used to being in dat spots. Now we put more dirt in dem gardens and mixed it in wif de sand and uvver stuff and we take dem Wawatah plants out of dem pots and put dem stwaight in dem gardens and den we put lots of gum leaves on dem cos Wawatahs loves gum leaves.
So now we will be gwowing Wawatahs and if we get some bootiful Wawatah flowers den Bernie will put a bootiful pikcha of dem on him blog.
Dem is Gwand-ma favouwite flowers.
And we planted some more twees in de fwoot twee garden wot we calls a orchard. It not weally a orchard cos it only got 7 fwoot twees and we is going to get one more to make 8 fwoot twees and dat is not weally vewy many for a orchard but we calls it a orchard so it be a little tiny weeny orchard.
And Gwand-ma plant some wadishes but dem comes up alweady. Gwand-ma say dem is easy to gwow.
And my Mummy cut off all dat bwoccolli and put it in de fweezer. Bernie helps him Mummy and my Gwand-ma and my Gwand-da. Bernie is a vewy exceptionally dood helping pussy cat.
And guess wot!  Jaffa knows how to go out and in de cat door. Bernie did not show her. She just figure it out for herself cos she is a vewy clever little girl pussy cat. She clever like her big bwuvver Bernie.
Well dat is lots of news for my blog weaders to wead about.
Luv fwom Bernie.




Saturday, 31 August 2013

Jaffa got outside

Today we could hear a little Jaffa meow. It was a vewy loud Jaffa meow but it sound little. We wun awound twying to find it and den we find out why it sound little. Dat was because she outside and cwying to come inside.
She got outside when someone leave de door open when dem putting cloves on de line.
Den she get vewy fwightened. She jump up and looking in the kitchen window. Gwand-ma open de family woom door and she wun inside. She vewy glad to get inside again cos she say she fink she see de bogey man.
And dat bogey man got annuvver little kitten wot lived acwoss de road from us. It be Isabelle's kitten. Isabelle is a little girl wot live acwoss de woad from us.
My Gwand-ma is going to wing de WSPCA.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 30 August 2013

Good Licks

In one of Bernie blog entwies me said dat Jaffa jump on Bernie. Dat is still twue but it do not bovver Bernie any more because she only jump on me so she can weach up and lick Bernie on de face. It very hard for a pussy cat to lick dem own face and get it clean so it is vewy useful when annuvver pussy cat what is a dood fwend or wot is your little sister do it for you.
Bernie like dat even if it do tickle.
De mans came and dem started to build our noo fence but so far we only got two new posts.
When it finished, Bernie will ask my Gwand-ma or my Mummy to take a pikcha so me can show all my blog weaders.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 22 August 2013

Outside Inside

Bernie likes to go outside sometimes but de cat doors is blocked over so dat little Jaffa will not go outside.
Sometimes Bernie pushes somefing out of de way so me can go out or come in.
Mostly me has to sit at de door and wait until someone lets me out. Bernie spends a lot of time sitting at a door outside, saying "Miaow" vewy loudly and vewy politely and dat means "Please let me in please".
Today me just gone outside and it start to wain.
Oh Bovver! me do not want to get wet.
Just then Gwand-da going somewhere and me hear dat Gawage door opening up.
Bernie wun awound vewy fast and wun in de gawage door but you know what? Dat door fwom de gawage into de laundwy was shut.
Oh Bovver again.
So Bernie sitting dere yelling out "Miaow Miaow" and dem wuns awound to all de doors to see where Bernie was. But Gwand-ma undertstand dat "Miaow miaow" means "Me is in de gawage" so she open dat door.
Bernie is very glad dat me taught Gwand-ma how to understand cat language.
Luv from Bernie

Monday, 19 August 2013

To de vet

Jaffa went to de vet and have her last injekshuns.
Now she had dem all.
She still got her wee pwoblem but Gwand-ma got mixed up about dat so tomowwow she wing de vet and tell him dat she do still have it. Gwand-ma fought she was getting better but she is not.
Jaffa and Bernie is getting to be fwends. We give each uvver little licks. Jaffa have such a little tongue dat when she give Bernie a little lick, it tickle. It more like a lickle dan a lick. Dem is tickle lickles.
Sometimes she come up ahind Bernie and smell Bernie bum. Next time she do dat, me might fart. Me do not do dat on purpose. Me could not help it. It just because me get nervous when someone looking closely at my bum.
Luv fwom Bernie.


Saturday, 17 August 2013

Annuvver place to do wee

Jaffa found annuvver place to do a little wee.
It is wight in de middle of de barf mat.
First she did one in de ensuite and gwand-da saw her. She sit in de middle of dat barf mat and do a wee and den she vewy carefully fold de corners over to cover up her wee.
Then a few days later she do de same fing in de barf woom and den my Mummy saw her.
She do a wee in de middle of de barf mat and den she cover it up by putting de corners neatly over de middle.
She finks nobody knows she do a wee dere if she cover it over.
But we know cos we can smell it.
Yuk
We always has to wash barf mats.
Luv fwom Bernie wot do him wee outside in de yard like a clever dood pussy cat.

Thursday, 15 August 2013

A dwinking fountain

When Polly was sick we buy her a dwinking fountain cos some pussy cats likes to dwink water wot is twickling along instead of water wot is staying still.
Now Uncle Tim gave us dat dwinking fountain when Polly gone to pussy cast Heaven.
De vet say dat Jaffa has to dwink lots of water so my Gwand-ma get dat fountain out and we give it a vewy dood clean and we put it dere for Jaffa.
She likes dat dwinking fountain but she still do not dwink out of it. She just likes to look at it.
She is a bit silly.
Bernie say "Hey Jaffa you is supposed to dwink out of it"
She say "Why don't you drink out of it then?"
Bernie say "Cos me do not like to dwink water wot is still alive"
Bernie will keep watching and see if she ever dwink out of it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 14 August 2013

My little sister

We all decided dat Bernie does not be Jaffa's Daddy cos my Mummy do not want to be a gwand muvver. So now Jaffa is my little sister and my Mummy is being her Mummy too. Me likes having a little sister. Sometimes she goes to sleep on de bed or de sofa next to Bernie. Sometimes she jump on Bernie and dat bovvers me but she do not bite my tail.
Jaffa found de twee in de fwont entwance foyer and she climbing up it. And she find dem white stones in dat pot wot dat twee stands in and she scoop dem on the floor. Dat noisy and it makes a mess. Bernie tell her "Do not do dat little Jaffa. Dem is supposed to stay in dat pot" Den she stop doing dat.
Bernie has to ask Hughie about sisters. Hughie, WOt do bwuvvers do wif sisters? do dems play dood all de time?
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 11 August 2013

Jaffa lets Bernie eat her tweats

When Jaffa is a dood girl and takes her medicine and tablets dood, sje is allowed to have some of dem yummy tweats. But she do not like dem yummy tweats so she lets Bernie eat dem.
Bernie finks dat Jaffa is vewy sick and maybe she will need lots and lots and lots of medicines.
Tonight Bernie is having a vewy nice head scwatch while me is witing my blog. My Gwand-ma gives it to me.
It make Bernie purrr and purrr and now me going to finish my blog for tonight so Gwand-ma can give me lots of cuddles.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 9 August 2013

Jaffa is sick

Today my Gwand-ma take Jaffa to see de vet. She sick. First of all she stop doing wee in her litter box. Gwand-ma found out dat when a dood pussy cat stops using de kitty litter to do wee but still do poops in it, dat means her wee hurts and she fink it is because dat kitty litter hurts.
Den Gwand-ma notice dat when Jaffa wants to do a wee she cwies and wuns awound and den she has to stop and do dat hurting wee and den Gwand-ma see dat her wee is dark bwown and it should be yellow. So all dat means dat Jaff is sick. So Gwand-ma take her to de vet and him say yes she is sick and all wot Gwand-ma said is twue. Him say she got a infection so she has to have tablets and medicines.
Dat vet  wot is called Uncle Lloyd, said dat dere be  two kinds of fings wot makes her sick like dat but we has to get some of her wee so de vet can do a test and see which one it is so we got de medicines to fix bofe of dem sicks.
Poor little Jaffa. It is not nice when doing a wee hurts a tiny little fing like dat pussy cat.
Bernie is taking speshul care of her and me gives her cuddles.
Luv fwom Bernie


A lovely warm place to lie down and woll awound

Today Bernie found a vewy warm place to have a nice little woll awound on de gwound.
It just near our letter box out on de woad. Dat woad feel nice and warm so me had a nice woll awound on it and put my legs up in de air.
Gwand-ma was standing at de fwont door yelling at me dat a car will wun over me. She silly. Dere was not any cars coming. and anyway dere be lots of woom for dem to go awound Bernie.
But just den a lady come past wif two yukky puppy dogs. Dem was wunning awound evewywhere wif her.
Bernie had to get up and wun inside before dem come past.
What a noosance.!
Luv fwom Bernie


Tuesday, 6 August 2013

What happening now

Well you knows how Bernie likes to go out de door and take a quiet walk awound de parf all de way awound de house and den me goes in annuvver door.
Dat just a little fing dat Bernie likes to do for exercise and to check up dat evewy fing is OK awound de house.
Now little Jaffa has found out dat she likes to sit on de windowsill in my Gwand-ma and Gwand-da bedwoom and look out de window. She quite like doing dat so evewy day she sit dere for a little while.
Well yesserday she get a big surpwise.
She sitting dere on dat window sill and having a little look at what is happening outside when all of a sudden she see Bernie walking wound de corner on my little walk awound de house. She nearly fall off de window sill because she get such a surpwise. She looking at Bernie and Bernie look up at her and we says hello and den Bernie keep walking past and me go wound de uvver corner and den she couldn't see me any more.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Wednesday, 31 July 2013

A quiet time wif Gwand-ma

Dat Jaffa has been wunning awound silly and Bernie likes to be a little bit quiet sometimes so me gone into my Gwand-ma study and me sitting on her desk while she doing some work on her  'puter and me having a quiet west.
Me put my paw on Gwand-ma arm cos dat is how me give her a little pat.
She gone to bed now so me do my blog and den me can go to bed too.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 29 July 2013

Aunty Lily knitting

Aunty Lily buy a magazine what has two balls of wool, some knitting needles, and a DVD what tells you how to knit.
It got de magazine too.  My Mummy buy dat magazine too. It be a coincidence dat my Mummy and my Aunty Lily bofe buy it.
My Aunty Lily start knitting. Her Mummy teach her when she was a vewy little girl about as big as Katy.
My Gwand-ma see her knitting when she gone to visit and she take a pikcha of her. She say dat Aunty Lily knit vewy vewy neat. Dem vewy surpwised cos she did not knit for years and years.
Now tonight she wing up and ask my Mummy a question. She say she put her knitting down in de middle of a wow and now she do not know which diwection she going. My Mummy tell her how to figure dat out. My Mummy is de cleverwest knitting Mummy in de world.
My Aunty Lily say dat two balls of wool was not enough to finish what she knitting so she tell Uncle Tim to go to de shop and buy 6 more copies of dat magazine.
'Now what do she do wif six more magazines, 6 more pairs of de same needles and 6 more DVDs all de same?
Now dat a pwoblem.
Why don't Aunty Lily just buy some more wool? Dat vewy funny but akchally it cheaper to buy de magazine wif de wool dan to buy de wool on it own. Maybe dat why she do dat.
Anyway she might give dem DVD's to my Mummy so she can put dem in de school libwarwy so de childwen can learn how to knit wif dem.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Saturday, 27 July 2013

Sekwets evewywhere

My Hughie has lots of sekwets.
One is about a sumfing what he is going to get for a vewy little someone telling her how to do sumfing but Bernie is not allowed to tell her.
Bernie is vewy excited about dat sekwet.
And My Gwand-ma tell Hughie a sekwet what him is allowed to tell peoples if him wants to but it do not happen for a long time.
But Bernie do  not like dat sekwet for a speshul weason.
Dis is annuver sekwet what my Mummy do not know
De uvver mornin my Gwand-ma hear a vewy loud  " Baaaaaa" outside de bedwoom window. She call Gwand-da and him come wunning in and look out but nuffing dere. Den Gwand-da wun out and look out de fwont door and five big big Baaa sheep is in our garden eating our plants. Gwand-da shooo dem away and dem eat de clover in de gwass.
Little Jaffa look out de fwont door and see dem big sheepses.  She get such a big fwight. She wun back inside weal fast and jump on Gwand-ma bed so she can get a big cuddle.
We do not want Jaffa to go outside so we always tells her dere be a big bogey man outside. Now we glad she see dem big sheep cos now she fwightened to go outside.
Luv fwom Bernie



Wednesday, 24 July 2013

Minding 'Puters

My Mummy leave her 'puter on de kitchen table and my Gwand-ma leave her  'puter  in de cwaft woom. Bernie was vewy busy minding dem 'puters cos  'puters does not like being  in a diffwent place. Me had a big long sleep all day on my Mummy 'puter and somefing  went silly wif it but my Mummy fix it. Dat was because a norty bogey man twy to pinch it but Bernie bite him and him wun away.
Aunty Kim be here and Gwand-da helps her wif sumfing.
Little Jaffa find a plastic cwate full of balls of wool and she get de top off it again and she get all de balls of wool out and put dem wound de house again. She loves dem balls of wool. She finks she is a knitting pussy cat.
Bernie say "Look you is suppoed to knit wif knitting needles" so den she twy to pick dem up but dem is too fin so she twy to use a pencil. What a silly pussy cat.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 20 July 2013

Bernie helps wif embwoiderwy

Gwand-ma is making some pwetty embwoiderwy for my Katy.
She get out all de embwoiderwy cottons and she say "Oh No. Where is Hughie? I need Hughie to mind these cottons like he did when we were doing the embroidery on his skivvie"
But Hughie gone home so Gwandma just put dem cottons on de table and dem wolling awound evewywhere.
Den Bernie say "Wait a minute Gwand-ma, Bernie got a dood fing what you can have." Me wun to de cupboard and me get de egg carton what me had when me was hatching googie eggs,
"Me bwing it to Gwand-ma and say "You can put dem in dis"
So Gwand-ma cut it and make a dood fing for holding cottons out of it.
It called a "egg cotton"
Luv fwom Bernie



Monday, 15 July 2013

Sumfing not fair

Evewybody wousing at Bernie when Bernie bite Jaffa on de back of de neck.
But Bernie do not hurt her and anyway she want Bernie to do dat.
She make a speshul mew mew mew noise to Bernie and she put her tummy on de gwound and her bum in de air and she say "Get on me and play a dood game wif me" and so Bernie playing dat game what Jaffa likes and evewybody wousing at Bernie.
Dem is silly. Dem do not know what Bernie and Jaffa talking about to each uvver.
Bernie knows cos Bernie talk pussy cat.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 11 July 2013

A vewy embawwassing visit

Bernie was looking forward to seeing my Katy and my Hughie.
Den when dem come Bernie get vewy excited and got all mixed up.
Dem makes lots more noise and Bernie did not know dat Katys and Hughies makes noise. Dat made Bernie get all discombobobobulated.
Me twy to give my Aunty Liz some lovely Bernie smell to take home in de case and me do a special little wee in de case but den devewybody tell Bernie dat is norty so me vewy embawwassed. Me vewy sowwy about dat.
My Miss Beff what Bernie luvs and luvs give me some dood cuddles so dat make Bernie feel a little bit better. Miss Beff knows Bernie cos she visited before and so Bernie not fwightened of her.
Den Bernie got all mixed up cos of de noise and lots of peoples wunning awound and dat fwighten poor old Bernie and me wouse at little Jaffa lots and lots. Oh miaow miaow miaow it not Jaffa fault. Bernie just all mixed up. And evewybody wouse at Bernie again.
Now dem gone home and it be quiet again here and me and Jaffa had a little talk and a cuddle and we fwends again and Jaffa say "Don't worry Bernie Daddy, you did not hurt little Jaffa."
Next time my Katy and my Hughie comes to visit Bernie has to wemember dat people is much noisier when you see dem dan on de blog or on de puter in dat Skype.
Me hopes my Katy and my Hughie still luvs deir Bernie fwend.
Bernie is going to help Gwand-ma to find dood embwoiderwies to put on dem cloves for my Katy and my Hughie.
Luv fwom Bernie




Sunday, 7 July 2013

Are dey here yet?

Are dey here yet?

Are dey here yet?

Are dey here yet?

Are dey here yet?

Are dey here yet?


Saturday, 6 July 2013

One more sleep

Doodness gwashus, it is only one more sleep before my Katy and my Hughie comes to visit me. Dat vewy exciting. Bernie goes to sleep now.
Nigh night.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 5 July 2013

A gigantic cat door

A amazing fing happen. Dem cars is inside de house. Cars is not supposed to dwive inside a house. Dat vewy stwange.
Dem has a vewy big gigantice huge enormous cat door and it go up and let dem cars go in and out.
When someone comes home in a car, Bernie wun out to meet dem cos Bernie is de butler.
But de car just slow down and den dat big cat door open up and de car dwive in de house.
Oh Miaow Miaow miaow. What happen next.
Bernie get all  discombobulated now.
Luv fwom  befuddled Bernie

Wednesday, 3 July 2013

Wool evewywhere

My Gwand-ma puts all de balls of wool in plastic boxes wif lids. Jaffa find one wifout a lid on tight so she get a ball of wool out and put wool all wound de house. Dat one was a gween one.
Den she go back and get annuver ball of wool and put more wool all wound de house. Dat time it was a pale blue one.  Den she go back and get annuver ball of wool wot is dark blue  and put more wool all wound de house.  Den she go back and get annuver ball of wool wot is annuvver pale blue one and put more wool all wound de house.Den she go back and get annuver ball of wool and put more wool all wound de house. Dat was a little one wif blue and gween togevver on it. Den she go back and get annuver ball of wool and put more wool all wound de house. Dat time it was a mauve one. Den she go back and get annuver ball of wool and put more dark blue wool all wound de house. Den she go back and get annuver ball of wool and put more wool all wound de house. Dat time it was a purple wool. Den she got a bill ball of silver wool but she do not unwavel dat one she just fink it is a big ball.  She say she is knitting a carpet.
What a silly kitten.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 30 June 2013

Scwambled eggs

Today Bernie help Gwand-da to make some scwambled eggs.
Gwand-da was bweaking de shells of de eggs and putting de inside bits in a bowl.
Den de tellemsphone wing and Gwand-da gone away talking on dat tellemsphone.
Bernie fink "Oh me can do dat" so me got a egg and bweak it but it gone evewywhere and de yellow bit what is called de yolk got bwoke. "OH no. You is not supposed to bweak dat yolk" finks Bernie. Bernie wemembers when him Mummy was making lemon mewingue pie and she say dat you has to bweak de eggs open but do not bweak de yolk.
Bernie quickly fwow dat bwoken egg in de bin and lick up de mess and den me get annuvver one and me put it in de bowl so it wont spill evewywhere and me bweak it and de yolk do not bweak so me just get all de egg shell out and dat one is dood. Bernie is vewy clever.
Den me use annuver bowl and bweak annuver one but OH Miaow miaow dat yolk bweak too so me quickly tip it in be bin and get annuvver  egg and me do annuvver one and it bweak too  so me has to fwow dat away too and den my Gwand-da come back and him say "Where are the eggs gone? There is nearly none left." but Bernie was having a little nap just den so me did not hear him.
Den Gwand-da notice dat dere is one more done dan him did and him say "Oh Bernie did you helped me? What a good pussy you are" and Bernie waked up just den and me say "Maaaow" what means "Yes me helped you."
Den Gwand-da finish making dem scwambled eggs and he lets Bernie have some cos Bernie helped.
Luv fwom Bernie


Friday, 28 June 2013

A few fings to tell peoples about today

Today my Gwand-ma and Aunty Mavis gone away and my Mummy and my Gwand-da cleaning up de house. Dat little pussy cat what we calls Jaffa say to Bernie "Mew mew why id dem tekking away all dem toys?"  Bernie say "Dey is not taking away toys, dem is cleaning up junk" But dat little pussy vewy sad cos she likes to play wif dat junk. She finks it is toys. Bernie tell her dat she can have lots of toys and Bernie will find her dood toys so she do not have to play wif junk. Dat makes her vewy happy.
Den de tellems phone wing and it be Uncle Tim to say dat Aunty Lily say she wants to come and visit us again. Dat vewy nice cos we likes to see our Uncle Timmy and Aunty Lily. We do not know why dem coming. Maybe she wants to see dis new kitten. Gwand-ma say it vewy handy cos she needs anuvver hair cut and my Mummy wants a hair cut too.
Aunty Lily is turning into de hair cutting person in de family.
Well we has to go to bed soon cos we all tired fwom cleaing de house ad Gwand-ma got de twailer fixed and her sewing machine fixed.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 27 June 2013

A invisible ticket for a invisible fwog

Ohh My Mummy can make a invisible ticket for Sam de invisible fwog to come to visit Bernie. Bernie will ask her and den Bernie will make a nice bed for him to sleep in when him come here. And Bernie will catch lots of invisible flies for Sam to eat.
OOOh dat is funny. Bernie has got annuvver fwend wot weads him blog called Sam. Two blog weading peoples called Sam!!!. But one is a fwog.
De uvver one is a vewy clever lady what wites fings in de noos paper.
Today dat Jaffa cat was helping Gwand-ma tidy up de cwaft woom. She (dat kitten) kept getting balls of wool and unwavvelling dem all awound de place.
She twying to knit. Bernie tell her she cannot knit cos she only got little paws not hands but she still twying.
In de mornings Bernie and Jaffa has dood fun playing. We likes to play on top of Mummy in bed. Dat funny. We plays on top of my Mummy in bed when she be still asleep. Soon a funny cwoaky voice comes and says "Go away! Don't play on top of me at half past 5 in the morning"
We just larfs.  It much more fun to play in de morning when dere is annuvver pussy cat to play wif.
Luv fwom Bernie





Wednesday, 26 June 2013

A new person wot weads my blog

Bernie found out about a new person what weads him blog.
It is a invisible fwog. Him is vewy clever to wead a pussy cat blog. And him can talk.
Dat is amazing. Fancy a invisible fwog wot can talk!
We is still getting weady for de visit of my Katy and my Hughie.
Tomowwow or de next day we is going to make sumfing but me cannot tell anyone about it yet.
Gwand-ma has a bit of twubble getting weady for dis visit cos she cannot walk dood dese days and she has to have a walking stick all de time. Maybe if she do not get better soon, Santa will bwing her a wheel chair and den Bernie can push her in it.
Jaffa Maddie Tasha Mahogony Cat would like dat cos den she just sit in Gwand-ma lap all de time. She is a cuddles pussy cat. She push so hard to get close to someone to get a dood cuddle dat she nearly push dem over. Bernie say "You can't get inside someone you silly pussy. Just next to dem" Den she turn awound and put her bum in dem face.
Oh Jaffa cat where is your manners?
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 23 June 2013

Some peoples do not give comments

Some peoples what wead Bernie blog do not give comments.
My Uncle Tim and my Gwand-ma and my Gwand-da weads Bernie blog all de time but dem do not put comments. Sometimes Bernie's Uncle Matt weads Bernie's blog and sometimes my Mummy's fwend Seher weads my blog too but dem do not put comments.
Bernie always wants dem to put comments so Bernie knows if dey like weading Bernie blog.
Some peoples on de uvver side of de world weads Bernie blog but me do not know dem.
But dem is vewy clever peoples cos only clever peoples can understand Bernie blog.
And my Katy and my Hughie is de cleverwest of dem all.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 22 June 2013

Twying to fink about anuvver way

My Katy and my Hughie says dat  Bernie dood idea about doing de photocopy of de calendar will not work.
Bernie ask him Mummy and she say it a vewy vewy clever idea but it still do not work but Bernie is vewy clever because him fink about dat.
My Mummy say dat maybe my Katy and my Hughie can get here a bit early and my Aunty Mavis will go a bit late and she can see my bootiful fwends. But Bernie do not know if dem is bootiful or not. Well maybe dem is bootiful but are dem kind?  My Mummy say dat dem is weally kind cos dem do not weally mean dat Bernie is dumb. My Mummy say dat Hughie was saying dat de idea is dumb cos it should work and it do not and dat is why it dumb.
Me needs to fink about dat too.
Oh miaow miaow miaow me got so much to fink about dat my little pussy cat head aches wight down to my pussy whiskers.
Bernie needs to go and get a cuddle fwom someone. Maybe me get a cuddle fwom my Mummy or my Gwand-ma or my Gwand-da or maybe dat little girl pussy cat might give Bernie a cuddle. She do give Bernie lots of pussy cat kisses.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 20 June 2013

Dat calendar

Bernie find dat calendar. it on de kitchen table. Bernie had a look and twy to count de sleeps. But dat vewy hard for a pussy cat to do. Me has to have a sleep in de middle of doing dat.
My Aunty Mavis came back fwom visiting her family. So now we all sits awound and has a talk and a cup of tea and tell each uvver de news.
And guess what. She might not be here when my Katy and my Hughie comes to visit. Dat vewy sad cos me wants to show my Katy and my Hughie to my Aunty Mavis so she can see what bootiful childwen dem is.
But my Aunty Mavis has to go to Canbewwa and mind her gwandchildwen. She goes on de same day what my Katy and my Hughie comes here. Dem cars might pass each uvver on de woad.
Oh Miaow miaow. Hmmmpphmiaowmmph.  Dat a noosance.
Maybe if Bernie do a photocopy of dat calendar and give dat to my Aunty Mavis dat might work. Hmmm me wonderwing about dat. Will dat work? Me could do a dood photocopy in colour. And Aunty Mavis can go on de day in de photocopy and my Katy and my Hughie can come on de day on my calendar and dem will not be de same day cos dem be on diffewent pieces of paper.
Yes dat will work.
Dat what me do. Bernie always solve de pwoblem.
Luv fwom Bernie


Tuesday, 18 June 2013

Dat pussy cat is still here

Dat little girl pussy cat is still here. Bernie do not know what to call her. Me was calling her Maddie now my Mummy say her name is going to be Jaffa. And Gwand-ma calls her Jay. She will get vewy mixed up.
But so far Bernie do not fink she care what we calls her. She too busy playing.
She wun vewy fast like Tilly but she still do not bite Bernie tail.
Also she is vewy funny when she attack somefing on de floor. If she sees a peg or a sock or somefing on de floor dat she wants to pounce on and bat it awound de place, she say "Hiya Hiya Mow mow mow" when she attacking it. She finks she doing kawate.
Maybe she is a Ninja pussy cat or sumfing.
It vewy funny to see a little pussy cat wif a sock in her mouf and shaking it and making a "mow mow mow" noise while she is doing dat. Bernie larf and larf.
Hmmm it looks like dat little pussy cat might end up staying here.
My Katy and my Hughie can have a play wif her when dem comes to visit.
It only 19 more human sleeps um  me not sure about dat cos Gwand-ma calendar gone away somewhere. Bernie finks it fell down.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 17 June 2013

A big wesponsibility

Evewybody say dat Bernie has to decide if dat little cat can stay living wif us or go back to de vet.
Dat a big decision for a pussy cat to make.
Dem say it because we do not want a pussy cat what upsets Bernie.
Dat is vewy nice of dem to fink of Bernie feelings but what about dat little pussy cat feelings? Maybe she likes to live at de vet hospital. We do not know if she wants to live here.
Bernie finks she likes living here but she do miaow for cuddles a lot. Maybe she feeling stwange and a bit fwightened. Bernie twying to look after her.
Me washed her bum for her two times.
Dat cos she is only a little pussy and she do not know about washing bums yet.
Also my Mummy finks she cannot stay being called Maddie. She say all our pussy cats has to have a special name and because dat pussy cat looks like chocolate and owange mised togevver she should be called Jaffa.
But is dat a dood name for a little girl pussy cat?
Bernie will get a pikch of her and put it on him blog and my Katy and my Hughie can have a look and tell me what dem fink.
Should we let her stay here?  If she stay here what should she be called? Is Jaffa a dood name? or Maddie or sumfing else?
Luv fwom Bernie





Saturday, 15 June 2013

Maddie is a dood pussy cat

Maddie do not bite Bernie tail and she do know how to give pussy cat kisses. She gives pussy cats kisses to evewyone. She gives dem to Bernie and my Mummy and my Gwand-ma and my Gwand-da. She even twies to give dem to visitors.
So dat means she is a dood pussy cat.
She has been playing in Tilly's tunnel. First she sniff all along it. She can smell a pussy cat what was Tilly's smell still in dat tunnel. Den she came to our ornament cat called Daisy wot my Aunty Lily gave to my Gwand-ma for Kwismus. Dat Daisy was standing on de floor wight near de end of Tilly's tunnel. Maddie could smell a pussy cat so when she came to de end of de tunnel and she saw Daisy, Maddie fought dat Daisy was de pussy cat what she could smell. Maddie twied to give Daisy a pussy cat kiss but Daisy just fell over. Daisy is made of wood and she got a spwing for a neck and her head bobbles. When Daisy fell over, she made a big bang and dat fwightened little Maddie but she did not wun away. She just fought Daisy ione to sleep wif her eyes open so Maddie went and play in dat tunnel.
Maddie loves dat tunnel. It got fings hanging in it and Maddie pounce on dem and she peek fwough de holes in de side and she wun vewy fast up and down dat tunnel.
Dat is much better dan wunning fast and chasing Bernie and biting Bernie tail.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 14 June 2013

A girl pussy called Maddie

Today a new little girl pussy cat come to visit us. She is visiting for de weekend to see if she likes to stay wif us.
Her name is Maddie.
She is black and ginger.
She is not a tiny little kitten but she is still a kitten. She is about four months old.
She seems to be a nice kitten.
She does not bie Bernie's tail and she lets Bernie give her a nose kiss.
We see how she goes for de weekend.
If she stays wif us, Bernie is going to be de daddy,
Den my Mummy will be a Gwand-ma and my Gwand-ma will be a Gweat Gwand-ma and my Gwand-da will be a gweat Gwand-da.
Dat is vewy twicky.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 13 June 2013

A message fwom de vet

Today dat nice lady wot is called Vicki wot works at de vet office wing us up.
She say dat de peoples from de vet was having a little meeting and dem talking about how we is vewy sad cos we lost two little pussy cats in a year.
Dem decided dat we can has a new pussy cat fwee and dem will let dat little pussy cat have all de operations and injecshuns fwee cos we is dood customers.
Dat vewy nice of dem.
So we might get a new little pussy cat for Bernie to have for company.
But please do not get a kitten wot chase Bernie's tail.
Luv fwom Bernie

Gone to de vet

Today Bernie gone to de vet and got my injecshun. Dat is so me will not get some howwible sick fings wong wif me. Uncle Lloyd look at Bernie vewy carefully and see if me is sick or anyfing. Bernie lost some weight. Dat is because Bernie has been twying not to eat too much dindins.
Uncle Lloyd say Bernie is nearly 12 years old. Him say Bernie is not a Spwing Chicken.
Oh Miaow miaow me hope de vet know de diffewence between a chookie and a pussy .
If him do not know de diffewence between a chookie and a pussy den him cannot pass his exams in vet school.
Dere be lots of puppy dogs going to dat vet to get injecshuns and fings and also some pussy cats what lives dere and someone bwing a new mummy pussy cat and her little baby kittens dere. She is a vewy busy Mummy pussy cat cos she got 6 kittens. Dem was dood little kittens and dem was not cwying,
Now me going to see my Mummy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 11 June 2013

Cleaning the barfwoom

Bernie's Mummy was cleaning de shower wecess in de barfwoom.
She was wiping de glass.
Bernie started wiping dat glass too wif my vewy dood cleaning paws.
My Mummy said dat Bernie is vewy clever and  me can always help wif dat cleaning de barfwoom.
Dat makes Bernie vewy happy because me likes to be useful and do fings wot me is vewy dood at doing and help peoples especially my Mummy wot me luvs and luvs..
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 8 June 2013

Lots of games

Evewybody is finking of dood games to play and fings to do when my Katy and my Hughie comes to visit.
Bernie is finking of dood games to play too.
Bernie is going to let dem get Bernie dindins. Dat is a vewy dood fun fing for dem to do. It vewy easy. Bernie will show dem where dat big bag of dindins is and where Bernie bowl is and dem can get some dindins out and put it in Bernie bowl. My Katy and my Hughie will have dood fun doing dat.
Today Bernie pwactise singing de bong bong song at de bong bong clock. Hee hee hee it be a funny song.
It just go bong bong bong bong.
Now me has to have a wash.
Luv fwom Bernie


Wednesday, 5 June 2013

A job for my Mummy

Today Bernie help Gwand-ma and Gwand-da tidy up my Mummy bedwoom while she be at school.
Usualllylly (dat a big word Bernie learn)  my Mummy do not teach at school on Wensdays but dis Wensday a teacher boss wing her up and say "Will you come and teach some more childwen please?" so my Mummy say "Yes OK" and she gone.
She was going to clean up her bedwoom today but she gone to teach some extwa childwen instead so we all clean it up for her.
Bernie be in charge of sorting out some books. Me tell Gwand-da dat my Mummy bookshelf is full up and she need annuvver bookshelf. Den me wun in de Gawage and me find annuver bookshelf and me say "Look Gwand-da my mummy can have dat bookshelf" so my Gwand-da get it and clean it and put it in my Mummy bedwoom and den me tell my Gwand-da to put all dem extwa books on it and dat make it much tidier.
Den when  my Mummy come home she beed vewy happy cos dat bedwoom looks much better,
Luv fwom dood tidying Bernie.

Monday, 3 June 2013

Lots of walking makes Bernie tired

My Mummy was talking to my Gwand-da and she say she going to de app shop cos dere be lots of dood fings to buy at dat app shop.
Den a little while later Bernie cannot find my Mummy.
Me looking evewywhere.
Den me wemember dat she going to go to de app shop.
Bernie go down to de stweet to find my Mummy at de app shop.
Bernie wants to tell my Mummy to buy him some nice chookie to eat fwom de app shop.
Me look evewywhere but me cannot find dat app shop.
ooooh  Miaow miaow Bernie little legs is vewy tired fwom all dat walking.
Me sit down and has a west and den me comes home.
And guess what. My Mummy still not home. Where is she?
Where is dat app shop?
Oooh Bernie is still vewy tired. Me go and have a nice sleep
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 31 May 2013

A funny noise

Bernie was sitting dere helping my Gwand-ma do some counting work on de 'puter.
Me sits in de in tway and hold dem papers still.
Den Bernie hear a stwange noise.
It go Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr  brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
But Bernie can't say dat so Bernie say Bwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww  bwwwwwwwwwwww
Bernie look up and me look awound. It coming fwom Gwand-ma chair.
Dat vewy stwange.
Den Bernie notice a stwange smell.
OOOOOooh    yuk.
Sowwy, me go somewhere else for a little while.
See ya later Gwand-ma.
Luv fwom Bernie
PS Will somebody please open de window.

Monday, 27 May 2013

Just walkin and sleepin and eatin and having cuddles.

Dat is all Bernie has to do now. Me sometimes goes outside and sniff dat vewy nice cat mint what Bernie give to him Mummy for Muvvers Day. Dat was a vewy dood pwesent and Bernie Mummy like it vewy much.
My Mummy had lots of sore bits today but she still gone to school cos she luvs dem kids and she luv being a dood teacher.
Bernie still waiting for him Katy and him Hughie to come and visit. Me just sitting dere watching de woad and waiting.
Luv fwom Bernie

.

Saturday, 25 May 2013

Dat silly puppy

Bernie is a vewy lonely pussy cat dese days cos me is de only pussy cat here. Bernie do not have my Heidi or my Tilly to play wif. Bernie walk awound all de time saying miaow miaow and den Gwand-ma say   "oh poor Bernie. You are lonely without another pussy cat to play with aren't you? Would you like to play with some of Tilly's toys?" so den she looking for one of Tilly's balls to fwow for Bernie to chase but she cannot find dem. Maybe Tilly come home and get dem. Den my Gwand-ma get dat silly dog and turn him on. Him sit dere and go "Woof woof woof woof" at Bernie
Bernie do not like dat dog. It fwighten Bernie. Tilly did not like dat dog eiver. It fwighten her. Only little Aussie who was a vewy bwave pussy cat used to like dat dog. Aussie used to jump on it and westle it to de gwound and turn it off. Hmmmm Aussie was a vewy clever pussy cat. Him can turn  dat silly dog  off by him button in him back.
Bernie wun away and hide under Gwand-ma bed. Den Gwand-ma turn off dat silly puppy dog and put him back under de pot plant so him can wemind pussy cats not to climb up dat pot plant.
Den Bernie wants to go out to de laundwy so me wun vewy fast past dat silly dog. Me wun fast like Tilly. Now me know why Tilly wun fast out dere. She wunning fast past dat silly dog.
Gwand-ma say "Oooh dat liven you up a bit old Bern"
Miaommmph!
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 21 May 2013

waiting waiting

Today Bernie wake up fwom him morning nap and me have a bi-i-i-i-i-i-g stwetch.
Den me fink "Oooh dat was lots of sleeps. Now it be time for my Katy and my Hughie to come and bisit"
So Bernie wun outside and me sit on de fwont vewandah and me waiting and waiting and waiting.
Soon Gwand-da come and say "What are you doing there Mr. Bern?"
Bernie say "Miaow" wot means "Me is waiting for my Katy and my Hughie to come"
Gwand-da say "Oh no it is a long time. There are lots more sleeps. There are 48 human sleeps and that is 192 pussy cat sleeps."
Bernie say "Oh No Miaow miaow miaow. Dat more dan last time. " and Gwand-da tell me dat maybe Gwand-ma do not count dem vewy dood.
Den him say if Bernie only has fwee sleeps evewy day it be only 144 sleeps.. But Bernie decides to only count de human sleeps cos den my Katy and my Hughie will come in 48 sleeps and dat is much faster.
Love fwom Bernie

Sunday, 19 May 2013

Bisitors gone home

Now my Uncle Tim and my Aunty Lily has gone home.
It was nmy Unclue Tim's birfday on Sattyday so my Gwand-ma make a birfday cake and put candles on it. Farver Phil come to dindins cos him can sing happy birfday vewy dood.
Dem would not let Bernie go in de dining woom when dem having dindins. Bernie miawo and miaow at dat door vewy loud and den evewybody give Bernie some of dat nice wiener schnitzel so me happy.
Den all de peoples sings Happy Birfday to Tim and dem make a big loud singing noise. Bernie go "miaow miaow". Dat dood fun.
Today we plant lots of new twees in our garden. Soon dem gwow big.
When my Aunty Lily and my Uncle Tim gone home,  Bernie and Gwand-ma gone over to Mavis place and we has a cup of coffee. Bernie is allowed to go in Mavis House cos dat is my Aunty Mavis. We is dood fwends. Aunty Mavis tell Bernie dat him can catch lots of mousies if me likes. So me had a look but me cannot find any so me gone home.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 17 May 2013

More bisitors

Soon my Uncle Tim and my Aunty Lily comes to bisit. We waiting for dem. Gwand-ma always make de bed and put clean towels and a choccie on dat towel. My Uncle Tim and my Aunty Lily likes dat.
We always put pwetty flowows and Bernie helps to get dem.     ooooh dem is here!
Luv fwom  huwwying   Bernie

Wednesday, 15 May 2013

Fwee sleeps gone

Bernie had a sleep last night until about time for de bong bong clock to do de first bong bong in de morning.  Den Bernie had him bweakfast. Den me had annuvver sleep until evewybody got up and me had a more bweakfast. Den me had a little walk awound and den me had a dood sleep on de lounge. Dat where Bernie always have him sleep in de morning.
Dat fwee sleeps gone. Now dere is only 116 sleeps before my Katy and my Hughie comes to bisit.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 14 May 2013

Ooooh Aaaaah aaaagh

Today Gwand-da gone in de shower. Den him start saying Ooooh  aaaaah   aaaaahhhh.
Bernie wun in de ensuite and see him.
Him saying aaaaah   aaaaah.
Bernie say "Miaow miaow" wot means "Get out of dere cos it hurts my Gwand-da"
But Gwand-da just say "Ooooohh dat warm water is very nice on my poor sore bits"
Bernie say "miaowmmmph!"  wot means "You's a nutter!"
Den me gone and have one of de sleeps. Now dere be only 119 sleeps left.
Luv fwom Bernie

Time to count sleeps

My Gwand-ma tell me dat my Katy and my Hughie comes to bisit. She tell me dem comes in about 120 sleeps. Now Bernie is going to be vewy busy having all dem sleeps.
Bernie will always tell evewybody how many sleeps is left when me wites my blog.
Do it count if me falls asleep in de middle of my blog?
Me has to find out about dat.
Luv fwom vewy happy Bernie

Saturday, 11 May 2013

Sunday, 5 May 2013

A important list

My Mummy and my Gwand-ma made a important list. It got all our fwends on it and it say how dem likes to have dem tea or coffee.
Dat is so when our important fwends comes to visit, we will know how to make deir tea or coffee wifout asking dem.
Even Bernie is on dat list.
Bernie have him tea wif just milk and no sugar and no tea.
And me has my coffee a bit like dat. For coffee me has milk wif no sugar and no coffee.
So now evewybody knows how Bernie has him tea and coffee.
You can make me a cup of tea or coffee when me comes to visit you.
Sanks you vewy much
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 3 May 2013

A bit quiet now

Bernie fink it be too quiet here now dat Bernie is de only pussy cat. Bernie do not have anyone to talk pussy cat to. Maybe Bernie should go over de woad and talk to Uncle Dawwen's pussy cat.
Or maybe me could be fwends wif Mr New's pussy cats. One of dem is like Heidi and one is like Tilly but dem is not Heidi and Tilly, so it just make Bernie sad.
We is still planting plants. We has got lots to plant.
Bernie was just out dere talking to dem plants dis morning when my Gwand-ma come and water dem. Bernie jump out of de way quickly quickly so me do not get wet. Bernie sit up on top of de Barbecue.
My Mummy tell me dat de parf do not say Bernie. it say Bernie's uvver name wot is Sleigh. But evewybody in dis house has got dat name. Dat is cos we is de Sleigh Family.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 2 May 2013

Going outside

My Mummy always wousing at Bernie when me go outside in de night time. She wowwying dat a norty boogie man might get Bernie.
My Mummy do not have to wowwy cos Bernie will scwatch dat boogie man and make him let go of Bernie.
Me do not like staying inside all de time. Me has to go outside for a little bit of fwesh air evewy now and den.
We has been planting lots of fings in our garden. Gwand-da likes de plants wot my Mummy buy in Nawwandewa because dem is little and my Gwand-da do not have to dig a big hole.
Now we has some more parfs. My Mummy tell me it spells out Bernie name. It say "Bernie"
Dat vewy dood.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 27 April 2013

Bernie is a vewy important pussy cat.

Yesserday we had lots of vewy important peoples come to our house for dindins.
My Gwand-ma set de table in de pwoper dining woom wif all de pwetty table cloff and pwetty plates and pwetty knifes and forks.
She put 8 places at dat table.
Den Aunty Mavis comes to dindins
And Farver Phil and Farver Simon and a new Farver wot is called Farver Bernard.
Him got de same name as Bernie
And Bernie had a speshul place to sit at de table next to him.
Bernie notice dat dere is woom for 8 peoples and only 7 humans come to dndins.  So dat is how Bernie knows dat me has to sit up at de table and have dindins wif evewy body.
Bernie was vewy happy. Me sit up on dat chair next to Farver Bernard wif a big pussy cat smile on my face. But nobody takes a pikcha. Next time we has some fwends come to dindins and Gwand-ma sets a place for Bernie, me will tell my Mummy to take a pikcha.
It was a vewy nice dindins. We had some Seher chookie what Bernie likes vewy much.
Luv fwom Bernie de dood dinner partying pussy cat.


A vewy happy sekwet

My Gwand-ma tell me a vewy happy sekwet but it not weally a sekwet so me can tell evewybody wot weads my blog.
My Katy and my Hughie might come and visit me and den Bernie can play wif dem.
Dat be dood fun.
Bernie is vewy happy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 25 April 2013

I slight embawwassing pwoblem

Today Bernie need to go to de toilet but de doors all shut. My Mummy tell me, "Do not go outside Mr. Bern because there is a norty man who gets pussy cats and hurts them." He already got Heidi and Tilly so do not let him get you."
So Bernie go into de ensuite and use Tilly's kitty litter. But it is a long time since me used kitty litter and me forgot. Me do not aim my bum dood and me do it outside de tway.
Oh Miaow miaow. How embawwassing. What me do about dat? Well Bernie work vewy hard and me scoop all de kitty litter out of de tway and put it on de floor and me cover it over pwoperly like me supposed to do.
Bernie was a dood pussy cat. Me always fink of sumfing to do to make evewyfing wight in de end.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 21 April 2013

A funny day

Today Bernie feel vewy stwange. Me was miaowing all de time. Evewybody say "What is the matter with Mr. Bern?"
But Bernie do not know wot is de matter wif me.
Me just feel stwange.
Maybe me is missing dat Tilly after all.
Bernie keep looking outside and inside but she not dere. Bernie tail say "How come nobody biting me any more?"
Bernie go in out in out in out.
My Mummy give me cuddles but me still feeling stwange.
Do anybody know what is wong wif Bernie?
Luv fwom Bernie

De only pussy cat

Now Bernie is de only pussy cat in de house.
Me has to be de butler all de time. Heidi was learning how to be a dood butler and she help Bernie but Heidi gone.
Bernie was twying to teach Tilly how to be a butler but she got it all mixed up. De butler is supposed to go and answer de fwont door bell and bwing people in when dem comes to visit.
Tilly used to bwing dem back to dem car when dem going home.
But Tilly was vewy dood at giving cuddles. People needs lots of pussy cat cuddles and Tilly did help Bernie to goive pussy cat cuddles.
Now bernie has to do all de peoples cuddling hisself.
Oh me is worn out.
Dat takes a lot of work to give pussy cat cuddles to fwee gwowed up peoples and all de visitors.
Bernie has to go to bed now and have a vewy dood sleep cos me is vewy tired.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 17 April 2013

Shhhh Sekwet!

Bernie have to sneak on and use Bernie's Mummy's computa because Grand-Moogi can't know Bernie do this post.

Today is Gwand-Moogi's birfday. Now she as old as Bernie but in human years not in cat years.

Bernie give Gwand-Moogi a pwesent but shush! Bernie give Gwand-Moogi extwa cuddles.

Bernie hopes dat dat litta Tilly comes home for Gwand-Moogi's birfday. Dat beed da best pwesent eva!

Sunday, 14 April 2013

Gwand-da is vewy sad

Gwand-da is vewy sad because Tilly is gone away. Dat is because Tilly is Gwand-da's pussy cat.
Bernie belong to my Mummy and Heidi belong to Gwand-ma and Tilly belong to Gwand-da.
Now dem all sad cos dem do not has dem pussy cats.
Oh dear. What we do now?
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 10 April 2013

Tilly Gone

Tilly gone away. We do not know where. She gone two days now. Bernie don't care cause now my tail do not hurt.
Gwand-da and Gwand-ma is bofe vewy sad.
My Mummy made a Tardis for a Fancy dwess party.
Here is a pikcha.
Bernie wanted to go as K9 but you has to have a costume starting wif TAPI or N. Dat funny. Bernie twy to tell him Mummy dat K9 is  Dr. Who puppy dog and puppy dog start wif P but she do not listen to Bernie. Maybe next year Bernie can be K9.
Luv fwom Bernie



Monday, 8 April 2013

Lots of Tilly Dwesses

Gwand-ma  make lots of Tilly dwesses to take to de vet cos he got annuvver pussy cat what licked her sore tummy and a lady has some pussy cats what might need some Tilly dwesses.
She make 3 white ones and 3 yellow ones.
Tilly twy on a yellow one and we take some pikchas so me can show evewybody on my blog.
Dis is a vewy bootiful Tilly dwess wif lace on it.
Tilly say she going to be a model when she gwow up cos she know all about cat walks.
And she was so clever she put her own foot in de foot hole. Gwand-ma do not need to put Tilly foot in it.
Tilly knows about how to put on a Tilly dwess.
Here is a pikcha.
Luv fwom Bernie


Saturday, 6 April 2013

Bernie better do some blog

Bernie has not done my blog for a long time. Me nearly forgot all about it.
My Mummy take a pikcha  for me to put on my blog but me do not know what it is.
Bernie will just go and ask Gwand-ma to get dat pikcha and put it on my blog so me can see it and tell evewybody about it.
Jus a minit.............................................................
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........................walky    walky     walky..........................
miaow ........miaow................................................




Ah Yes Miaow Miaow dat is what it was. It is a bootiful pikcha of handsome Bernie sitting in de Olive twee. Dat bottle of water next to de Olive Twee is its dwink. My Mummy gives it a dwink out of dat bottle.
Bernie sits in it sometimes cos it is Bernie Olive twee too. We is dood fwends. Dat Olive Twee wants to wead Bernie blog but it do not have a puter. Bernie just tell it what is on him blog evewy day.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 31 March 2013

Easter

Today be Easter. Aunty Mavis come to our place for lunch and my dood fwend Stasie.
Dem all had a nice din dins and my Mummy give me some. it was yummy woast lamb.
Den my Uncle Timmy and my Aunty Lily gone home but Gwand-ma want to keep Aunty Lily here cos ashe vewy dood at putting fings in de dishwasher and taking dem out.
Also Aunty Lily loves Bernie better dan Tilly.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 29 March 2013

Bernie is de Easter Bunny

My Mummy make me some pwetty little Bunny ears so me can be de Easter Bunny.
Bernie got a little basket of Easter eggs and me gone into my Uncle Timmy and my Aunty Lily bedwoom and Bernie was going to leave some Easter eggs in dere for dem.
Here is a pikcha of Bernie having a look to see how many eggs me can leave for my Uncle Timmy and my Aunty Lily.



Just den my Mummy come and she say "Oh dem is vewy nice Easter eggs can me have some ?" and she gwab dat basket. Bernie say "No dem is not all for you. You has to wait and see what Bernie de Easter Bunny leaves for you."
Here is a pikcha of my Mummy twying to pinch all dem Easter eggs off de Easter Bunny.

You can see dat Bernie is not vewy happy wif his Mummy. But me finks me will give dem all to my Mummy cos me loves her de best and she make de dood Easter Bunny ears.
Luv fwom Bernie


Thursday, 28 March 2013

Finding bunny wabbit ears

My Gwand-ma tell me dat she looked in de supermarket and dem did not have any bunny wabbit ewars. Bernie is going to ask my Mummy to make him some bunny wabbit ears cos my Mummy is a vewy clever making fings Mummy.
Den me can be de Easter Bunny.
Dat is all.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 27 March 2013

Where Tilly put her dwess

Bernie ask Tilly where she put her dwess.
She say "IputitinthewardrobeonGrand-ma'ssidebecausethatiswheredressesgo"
Oh dat was vewy interwesting. Bernie go and have a look and she did put it dere. She did not hang it up on a coat hanger cos it too little and she do not have a coat hanger to fit but she weally and twuly did leave it in de wardwobe. So she was a dood Tilly.
Now de next important fing what Bernie must ell all his blog weaders is dat Bernie has to be de Easter Bunny dis year.
Little Tilly do not know about Easter Bunnies. She was not even born last Easter so dat is why she do not know about it.
Will someone help Bernie to get some dood Easter Bunny ears please, so me can be de Easter Bunny?
Sanks you.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 24 March 2013

A New pink dwess and she take it off

Well dat is about it.
Gwand-ma make Tilly a new dwess what is cweam wif pink lace and pink wibbon but she take it off and now we do not know where she put it.
She supposed to keep wearwing it until tonight. But her tummy is better now so dat do not matter.
We just wants to take a pikcha of Tilly in dat new dwess. When we finds it we make her put it back on and den we takes a pikcha of it.
Maybe Bernie will tell her dat her Uncle Lloyd wants to see a pikcha of her in dat new dwess and den she will go and get it.
Dat sounds like a dood plan.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 22 March 2013

Tilly is vewy pwoud of herself

Today Tilly went to de vet again to see if her tummy getting better.
When Gwand-ma tell her dat she has to go to de vet, she was in Gwand-ma and Gwand-da bedwoom. Tilly wun vewy fast down de hall, fwough de kitchen, down de family woom, fwough de laundwy and into de gawage as fast as fast as she can. And she wun wight up to her cawwy basket and wait for Gwand-ma to undo it so she can jump in and go and see her dood fwend Uncle Lloyd what is de vet.
Bernie finks Tillky loves dat Uncle Lloyd cos she likes going to see him.
When she got dere, Uncle Lloyd and Aunty Vicky had a look at her dwess. Dey said it is a bootiful dwess and dey fink my Gwand-ma is a vewy clever Gwand-ma for making dat Tilly dwess.
Uncle Lloyd take her pikcha on him tellems-fone. Tilly is vewy pleased about dat. She fink Uncle Lloyd must like her cos him take her pikcha.
Anyway she is a dood girl and her tummy is getting better dood. Soon she do not have to wear her dwess any more. Maybe she will want to keep wearwing it cos me finks she like it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 20 March 2013

A little white dwess

Dat bandage was not vewy dood cos it woll down away fwom Tilly Tummy so my Gwand-ma make her a little white dwess wif lace and wibbons on it so it cover up her tummy. At first Tilly fink she cannot walk in dat dwess. Evewy time she twy to walk in it she woll over but den she find out dat she can walk in it weal dood. She finks she is a weal gwowed up pussy cat  like Gwand-ma and my Mummy cos she got a dwess.
She look vewy cute. She do not has to wear dat collar when she got dis dwess on .
Here is a pikcha. We was sweeping de floor and she twy to help us. Dat is how she get a infection in her tummy so we glad she got her dwess on to stop all dat yukky dirt getting on her tummy.




Gwand-ma made Tilly annuvver dwess wot was gween but Tilly wun away and take it off.
Now we got it back but Gwand-ma say it too big. We has to make her some more dwesses. Tilly dwess has a hole in de back so she can go to de toilet.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 17 March 2013

What dat kitten doing now?

My Gwand-ma notice dat Tilly can still lick her tummy even when she wearing dat speshul collar what is supposed to stop her fwom licking her tummy.
She can lick it down de bottom. So my Gwand-ma wing Uncle Jim and Uncle Jim say dat we has to put a bandage on Tilly tummy.
Well Bernie was helping but it vewy hard to put a bandage on a wiggly tummy.
So den My Mummy and my Gwand-ma got a speshul bandage what is wound like a tube and dem cut leg holes and dey tell Tilly she has to wear dese little pants. Here is a pikcha. Tilly do not like wearwing pants cos she say she a girl but she get used to dem.
Here is a pilch of Tilly in her speshul pants.
Luv fwom Bernie


Friday, 15 March 2013

Tilly had anuvver operwation

Tilly had to go back to dat vet hospital and have anuvver operwation. De vet what is called Uncle Lloyd had to fix her stitches and him had to cut a bit of dat dead skin off and sew her up again and she had to have anuvver one of dem anas feticks. She is home now and we hope she do not go watty again and wun awound de place and scoop all de water out of her water bowl like she did de uvver time when she had a operwation.
Poor little Tilly. She cannot lick herself because she still have dat funny collar on.
Bernie will have to go and help her. We all has to give her cuddles all de time for a whole week.
Phew! What a lot of cuddles for a little kitten.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 14 March 2013

Happy Birfday to Katy

It beed Katy's birfday and me forgot to tell her happy birfday.
Hee heee hee, when Bernie was a little kitten me used to fink it was a Have de birfday but now me knows it is a happy birfday.
Me is going to send a email birfday card to Katy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tilly got a speshul medieval collar

Hullo to my blog weaders,
Tilly little tummy not getting better dood. Her stitches is coming undone.
My Gwand-ma take her to de vet and Uncle Lloyd was dere. He say dat Tilly should be healing up much better and she got her tummy infected.
She come home wif a little wound collar on called a Elizabefan Collar.
Now she has to go back to de vet tomorrow and have annuvver little operwation to sew her up again. Please do not tell Tilly because she will get wowwied about it.
Luv fwom Bernie