Thursday, 29 December 2011

Unca Timmy wif a tail

Now my Mummy send me dat vewy funny pikcha wot she took of my Unca Timmy wif a tail.
It is a bootiful tail wot me and my Gwand-ma make for a kwismus pwesent for my Aunty Lily. My Aunty Lily sneak up behind my Unca Tim and pin it on him and den my Mummy quickly quickly take a pikcha.
Unca Timmy do not know how to wave dat tail like bernie and heidi and Polly do.
It is not a weal tail. It is a fing what my Aunty Lily can use to play wif pussy cats.

Here is dat funny pikcha.

Wednesday, 28 December 2011

Heidi and Polly is fwends

Heidi and Polly is getting to be fwends. Dem do not lick each uvver yet or touch noses but dem do not hiss at each uvver. Dem just looks at each uvver and walks past.
Polly got some nice diffewent dindins and she let us have some. We lets Polly have some of our nice dindins too. It dood funs to share dindins.
Today Polly has a litta walk outside but she do not wun away. She find some dood places to have a litta sleep. She is vewy clever at finding dood sleep places.
Me likes having Polly here for a visit cos Polly and me used to live togevver and Polly was my pwetend Mummy when I was a baby kitten.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Tuesday, 27 December 2011

A Pussy Cat visitor

My Unca Tim and my Aunty Lily has gone on a litta holiday and my cousin Polly stay wif us while dey gone away.
Bernie and Polly knows each uvver so we do not hiss at each uvver but litta Heidi do not wemember Polly so she hiss at her.
Polly do not wemember litta Heidi so Polly hiss back.
Bernie tell dem dat dem can be fwends cos we is all cousins so now dey stops hissing and just looks at each uvver.
Evewybody got vewy tired at Kwismus so we all has lots of wests.
Now we feelin better and we is going to have funs.
luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 25 December 2011

Umm Maybe she got mixed up

Bernie make a nice pwetty pwesent for his Aunty Lily.
It is a pussy cat playing fing. She supposed to play with Bernie wif it but she get a bit mixed up and she fink it is a tail for Unca Tim and she pin it on him when him not looking.
Me fink my Aunty Lily only likes fings what got tails. Dat why she love Bernie.
Now she love Unca Tim cos he got a tail too.
Bernie is a clever pussy cat.
Maybe my Gwand-ma will take a pikcha of Unca Tim wif his new tail on.

Thursday, 22 December 2011

Making a pwesent

Bernie is making a dood pwetty pwesent for his Aunty Lily.
Me hope she like it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 21 December 2011

Waiting for Evewybody

Now Bernie is waiting waiting.
Me waiting for my Unca Tim and my Aunty Lily to come and visit for Kwismus.
Oh no me did not get a pwesent for my Aunty Lily!
Me has to ask Gwand-ma if she can get a vewy nice pwesent for Bernie to give to his Aunty Lily. Maybe Bernie should get a pwesent for his Unca Tim too but dat not so important as a pwesent for Aunty Lily.
Bernie also waiting for Santa Claus to come. Bernie beed a dood pussy cat so Santa bwing him a pwessie.
Some peoples say Santa is not twue but dem peoples fink pussy cats can't wite blogs so dem is silly.
Santa is twue for pussy cats who wite blogs.
Luv fwom Bernie de blog witing pussy cat.

Tuesday, 20 December 2011

We buyed pwesents

Today my Mummy and my Gwand-ma and my Gwand-da go to de shops and buy some pwesents for Bernie to give to his Mummy.
My Gwand-ma say she use some of my butler pay so dat vewy dood.
My Gwand-ma and me had a dood litta talk and we fink about what I give my Mummy for Kwismus. Now she buyed a dood pwesent but me can't put it on my blog because my Mummy will wead my blog and spoil de surpwise.
De lady at de shop wap it up in pwetty Kwismus paper cos Bernie can't wap it up. My Gwand-ma tell her dat it fwom Bernie to his Mummy and she say she unnerstand dat vewy dood cos her pussy cat gives pwesents to her too and she knows dat pussy cats can't wap up pwesents.
My Katy and My Hughie give me vewy dood ideas for pwesents but me keep it a sekwet if I use dem dood ideas so my Mummy wont find out.
Hee hee me like sekwets. Dem is fun.
Luv fwom Bernie

No money

Oh Miaow miaow. Me just wemembered. Me hasn't got any money so how me get a pwesent for my Mummy? Oh dear! Bernie do lots of work cos me is de butler but me do not get paid. Hmmmm maybe Bernie go on stwike until he get paid. Me hear about dat on de television. Dat a dood idea. Bernie glad he fink about dat.
So now Bernie go on stwike. Den me can buy a dood pwesent for my Mummy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 19 December 2011

Chwistmas shopping

Bernie is twying to fink what he can get for his Mummy for Kwismus.
Me had a look awound de place and me decide dat my Mummy will not like a nice yummy mousie cos she always say dem is yuk.
My Mummy always wouse at Bernie if he catch a birdie so me cannot get her a birdie.
Heidi say she going to get a lizard for Gwand-ma but me tell her not to get dat cos Gwand-ma always put dem back outside.
Maybe my Gwand-ma will help Bernie to get a dood pwesent for his Mummy.
Me twying to fink of a dood idea so if anyone knows a dood idea for pwesents for Mummies, please tell Bernie. But please tell Bernie in sekwet so my Mummy won't find out.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 18 December 2011

My Mummy home now

My Mummy is home now and Bernie is happy.
When my Mummy come home Bernie was shut in Gwand-ma and Gwand-da bedwoom.
Me hear my Mummy and me miaow and miaow but she walk past and go to de kitchen. She calling me and me Miaowing but she can't hear. My Mummy go outside and my Gwand-ma come and find me.
Bernie wun outside fast and when he see his Mummy he wun up to her fast as fast and my Mummy pick me up and give me a cuddle.
Me happy now,

Saturday, 17 December 2011

Dat where my Mummy is

Bernie come to his blog to put a message about where is my Mummy.
Bernie walkin awound evewywhere saying Miaow Miaow twying to find my Mummy.
Me don't know where she is.
Me lookin evewywhere.
Gwand-da say "Why is Bernie miaowing so much? Maybe he looking for his Mummy"
Yes dat wight Gwand-da. Me twying to find my Mummy.
Pussy cats and uvver peoples always cwying when dem can't find deir Mummy. Don't you know dat?
Now when me come to wite a message in my blog about "Where is my Mummy" me see a message wot my Mummy wite about she visiting my cousin Polly.
So now me know where she be.
But me still miss my Mummy.
Even Aunty Mavis notice how Bernie miss his Mummy.
Please comes home soon Mummy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Bye Bye Cuzzin Joel

Now our cuzzin Joel has gone home. Dat was just when Heidi was gettin used to him.
Oh dear. Bernie likes to have visitors cos dem always gives Bernie a pat and Bernie likes pats.
Now my Gwand-da is wetired. Gwand-ma say dat means him does not go to school evewy day.
Dat good. Me can play wif my Gwand-da all day now.
Now me go and find a dood game to play wif my Gwand-da and it don't have hoses in it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 12 December 2011

A visitor

Today we got a new visitor. It is a cuzzin called Joel.
He is a big man. He is big upwards but not outwards.
He is a vewy nice man and Bernie likes him. Heidi is getting used to him.
He says hello to us and gives us a pat so we knows he is a dood fwend.
Heidi and me had a litta sleep on his bed today. Dat was to make sure it is a dood bed. We do not want our cuzzin, Joel to sleep on a yukkey bed.
My Gwand-ma taked a pikcha of us.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 10 December 2011

Dem silly birdies

Bernie was waiting for his Gwand-ma to come home. Bernie is de butler and it is de butler job to meet peoples and bwing dem inside.
Bernie waiting patiently.
A birdie was sittin on de letter box and anuvver birdie was sittin on de wailing near de fwont vewandah.
When Gwand-ma car come and stop dey just sit dere and watch.
Den Bernie get up and he walkin out very dignified like he always do.
Bernie say "Miaow" to welcome Gwand-ma and dem silly birdies fly away.
Bernie was not going to catch dem. Bernie was lookin at Gwand-ma and me say hello to Gwand-ma. Can't dem birdies unnerstand plain cat?
Oh well, Dem was not in plastic bags so I do not catch dem. My Mummy tell me only catch birdies in plastic bags wif no feafers.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 8 December 2011

Dem pikchas

A long long time ago, Bernie was twying to get some pikchas off his Gwand-ma camewa and put dem on his blog.
Bernie twy vewy hard. He get lots of sticky tape and sticky tape dat camewa to his blog and he look at dem keys but he can't find dat key what say "put de pikchas on de blog" so Bernie has to ask his Gwand-ma to do it.
Now Bernie Gwand-ma take a pikcha of Bernie doin dat but she take dat pikcha on her tellems phone (dat is de fing what you use to tellem someone sumfing).
Bernie ask Gwand-ma if she can put dem pikchas on Bernie blog too but she don't know how to get dem off her phone. Bernie twy to take a pikcha of Gwand-ma getting de pikchas off her phone using de toaster but dat don't work dood. De flash don't work on de toaster.
Den Bernie look in de fwidge to get some more sticky tape but just den de micwowave wing and so Bernie has to go and answer it.
Bernie say Miaow but it must be de wong number cos nobody dere.
Den my Clever Mummy come to de wescue and she get dem pikchas off dat phone and put dem on dis computer so now Bernie can show evewybody how hard he be twying.


Evewybody knows dat kwismus comes soon.
Bernie wemember dat at kwismus evewybody eat turkey what is a big birdie wot got no feafers.
So Bernie decide dat not vewy dood so Bernie go and find a nice big birdie wif dood feafers and he catch it and bwing it inside for kwismus dinner.
My Mummy say "Oh no Bernie what have you done? You must not catch birdies. Oh the poor thing!" and she take it outside and fwow it in de garbage bin.
Bernie not vewy impwessed. Bernie twying to get a dood dinner so today Bernie go and catch anuvver birdie and he bwing it in to his Mummy bedwoom and put it on her floor.
Bernie sit dere and miaow vewy loud. Evewybody come and say "What's the matter, Bernie?"
Bernie just miawo and miaow vewy vewy loud to say "Look you stoopid peoples. Me bwings a vewy dood dindins for kwismus"
Then my Mummy see dat birdie and .......
She wouse on Bernie again!!!!!!!
My Mummy is a vewy ungwateful person. She take dat birdie away again.
Bernie not vewy happy. Bernie twy to stamp his foot but as you know, Bernie has soft foots and dem soft foots does not stamp vewy well.
Bernie walk up and down and say Miaow Miaow.
Den Bernie twy to stamp him foot again but it hurt.
Oh bovver! Bernie goes and has some dindins and goes to sleep.
Miaowmmmph! Bernie vewy cwanky at evewybody.
Luv fwom Bernie
But Bernie not cwanky at his dood Katy and his dood Hughie.

Tuesday, 6 December 2011

Mopping dat kitchen floor

Do you wemember how Bernie told evewybody about Gwand-ma mop dat kitchen floor and she take away our dindins bowl so we nearly starve to deaf?
Well after dat, Gwand-ma mop de floor lots of times but she do not take away our dindins bowl but today she do a mop and she take it away again.
Dis time Bernie go and say a vewy nice litta Meow to Gwand-ma and she say “Oh yes Bernie. You wants your din dins bowl. Here it is”
Den she put it on de lounge woom floor so Bernie and Heidi can have a litta snack.
We vewy glad we got dat dood awangement now.
But Heidi notice dat de kitchen smell vewy stwange.
She sniff all awound and she say “Unca Bernie what ith that thtrange thmell in the kitchen?”
Bernie say “It de cleaning stuff what Gwand-ma use”
Heidi say “It’th dithguthting. It doeth not thmell clean to me. It thmellth yukkie and I have got thticky thtuff on my litta pawth.” Bernie say “Dat because you walked on dat floor. You should not walk on it until it is dwy”
Heidi say “Oh dear. Now I hath to go and lick that dithguthting thtuff off my poor litta thenthitive pawth”
Hee hee next time Heidi will wemember not to walk on dat floor when Gwand-ma is cleanin it.
Luv fwom Bernie.

My Mummy birfday

Today wot was de day wot we jus had was my Mummy's birfday.
Bernie and Heidi give her a bootiful pwesent for her noo garden. And Bernie make her a bootiful birfday card wif a pussy cat on it and a litta birdie.
Bernie cannot wite on dat card cos me cannot hold a pen wif my paws so me hold dat card still while my Gwand-ma wite on it for me.
Bernie give his Mummy cuddles for her birfday.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 3 December 2011

Hard workin in de garden pussy cat

Today Bernie worked vewy hard in de garden. He help my Gwand-da and my Gwand-ma and my Mummy to mow dat gwass.
It is a vewy hard job for a pussy cat.
Bernie has to watch carefully so dey do not miss a bit.
Den when dey wants to mow where Bernie sittin, Bernie has to get up and move to annuvver spot.
Dat take lots of hard workin out.
Bernie working so hard dat sumtimes he fall asleep, but now all de gwass is mowed and it look nice and neat. Bernie vewy pwoud of all his hard work.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 1 December 2011

Bernie has to be clever

Last night Bernie had to be a vewy clever pussy cat.
Litta Heidi was cwying cos she hungwy and dere was no dindins in dat dindins bowl.
First Bernie fink he might go and find a mousie and catch dat for litta Heidi to eat but den he wemember dat sumtimes when a pussy cat eat a mousie he get howwible worms fwom dat mousie and Bernie do not want litta Heidi to get dem worms so Bernie decide dat a mousie is not a dood fing for litta Heidi to eat.
My Mummy and my Gwand-ma was sound asleep in deir beds and dat door was shut so Bernie cannot go and wake dem up to get din dins for Heidi.
So what Bernie do?
Bernie vewy clever. Bernie go out dat back door and he wun all awound to de fwont of de house.
Den Bernie wun up on de fwont vewandah and he jump up on de window sill of my Mummy bedwoom and he miaow fwough de window.
Bernie has to miaow vewy loud so he wake up his Mummy.
Bernie miaow and miaow and soon my Mummy wake up and she come and let Bernie inside. She say "Do you want to come inside Bernie?" So Bernie go inside but he sit dere and he keeps miaowing so she knows dat dere is sumfing else what Bernie want. Den Bernie start walkin to dat kitchen and his Mummy follow and she see litta Heidi sitting dere near dat empty bowl and den she know what Bernie twying to tell her. My Mummy get some nice dindins and put it in de bowl for litta Heidi and Bernie have some too.
It take a long time to do all dis but Bernie loves his litta Heidi and he do not mind if he has to work hard to take dood care of her.

Tuesday, 29 November 2011

Vewy Scairwy

Tonight it be vewy scairwy. A big light come in sky and fwighten Bernie and litta Heidi. Litta Heidi cwawl inside her litta house wot is stuck on de scwatching post and she hide dere. Bernie wait in de lounge woom until dat funny light stop flashing and making big loud noise. It make a big lot of wain too.
Me glad dat stop now.
Also Bernie go on Facebook cos Bernie got lots of fwends wot is on facebook.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 27 November 2011

Lots of fings

It wained and wained. Bernie does not like going out in dat wain but when peoples comes to bisit, Bernie still be de butler and go out and bwing dem inside. Bernie does not stop being de butler just because it waining. Bernie is vewy bwave.
Now it stop waining and it get hot again. Bernie and Heidi spend some time outside sleeping under dem twees. But litta Heidi be a bit norty. She do not know she is norty. She had a litta sleep on dat new litta garden. Gwand-ma come and say "Heidi get off those Vincas. You should not sleep on them little girl. They are only baby flowers"
Heidi jump up stwaight away but dat litta baby flower look all squashed. Gwand-ma pat it and lift it up and give it a dwink and now it OK.
Den we all busy doin lots of fings in dat Kitchen. Gwand-ma clean dat fwidge and she find fings what Bernie has to eat up. Dat a vewy important job for de pussy cats. We get left overs of corn beef, ham, turkey and sausages. How we eat all dat?
We need to get Wosy to come and help.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 22 November 2011

Noo house

My Mummy and my Gwand-ma and my Gwand-da tell litta Heidi and me all about dat noo house.
Now my Gwand-ma show Bernie some pikchas of it. It got two cat doors speshully for litta Heidi and me.
My Gwand-ma take some pikchas of dem cat doors. Dem look like holes but she say dat soon dere be speshul doors on dem.
Here is dem pikchas

Sunday, 20 November 2011

A vewy happy time

My Aunty Lily and Unca Tim come to bisit. Lots of peoples come to bisit. Bernie is a vewy busy butler. But de best bisitor was my Aunty Lily cos she give Bernie cuddles.
Bernie love his Aunty Lily.
But she gone home now.
Bernie nearly go home wif Aunty Lily but Aunty Lily does not have dat nice din dins for Bernie. Dat nice din dins is still in our cupboard so Bernie stay here.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 16 November 2011

Gwand-ma being a norty gwammawartzi

Dis morning, Bernie was sound asleep in his own speshul place to go to sleep which is wight on top of his Mummy when suddenly Gwand-ma come in and take a picture.
Just because Bernie is a famous pussy cat, evewybody wants a pikcha of Bernie.
Bernie catfiscate dat camewa and get dat pikcha.
Here it is:

Bernie wake up and say "Go away Gwand-ma! You must not wake up my Mummy"
and she take a pikcha of dat too.
You can see how cwanky Bernie is. Bernie works vewy hard to take dood care of his Mummy.

Monday, 14 November 2011

Bernie twick norty Gwand-ma

Today my Mummy and my Gwand-ma be outside planting some litta flowers in de garden.
My Gwand-ma get de hose an she spway poor Bernie wif water. Bernie wun away but dat vewy norty Gwand-ma chase Bernie wif dat hose and she larfin.
But Bernie twick dat norty Gwand-ma. Bernie wun and stand unnerneaf de close line where dere be lots of close dat is dwy. Gwand-ma do not want to get dem wet again so she cannot spway Bernie dere. Bernie know dat. Bernie clever. So dat how Bernie twick norty bad Gwand-ma.

Saturday, 12 November 2011

hot days and lots of fings

It be a hot day today and Bernie and Heidi was just sittin awound.
Gwand-ma twyin to do lots of fings and she say Bernie can help.
Oh cat! (Wemember dat wot pussy cats say instead of 'Oh boy')Bernie wemember dat he did not wite his blog so he go and do dat. He say "But Gwand-ma Bernie is witin his blog!"
Oh cat! It too hot to do fings but when Bernie finished his blog, Bernie be dood and go out on de fwont vewandah in case someone needs a butler.
Dat how Bernie help.
Bernie is such a vewy dood helpin pussy cat.
My Katy tell me a dood idea. Next time Gwand-ma mop dat floor, Bernie twy and look weal cute like Heidi and den maybe Gwand-ma leave our din dins bowl somewhere dood so we can get it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 6 November 2011

Cleaning dat kitchen floor.

Whenever Gwand-ma clean dat kitchen floor, she take away our din dins bowl and our litta place mat wot marks de place where we has our din dins.
Bernie goes to have a litta snack cos he is hungwy and dere is no din dins bowl dere.
Poor ol Bernie nearly starve to deaf while Gwand-ma mop dat kitchen floor.
It take a whole half a hour.
Oh boy! Bernie wite a letta to someone and complain about dat.
Maybe my Katy tell me what Bernie do about dat.
Luv fwom Bernie

Nice dindins

My Gwand-ma buy nice din dins and sumtimes we has a litta taste but we does not eat it all up at once.
It getting warm here and Bernie and Heidi needs to get some of deir fur off. We be glad when it got off.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 5 November 2011

Gwand-ma home

Fank goodness my Gwand-ma is home an Bernie can use her puter.
Also Gwand-ma say dat Bernie lose weight while she away bisiting my dood fwend Brrrrr.
Dat because my Mummy and my Gwand-da does not know what pussy cat din dins to buy for us and dey buy yukkie stuff so Bernie and litta Heidi getting skinny.
Of course Bernie do not wowwy about hisself. No, Bernie is not a gweedy pussy cat. But Bernie is vewy wowwied about dat dear litta Heidi. She orlweady bees litta. She do not need to get littawer.
Me asked my Gwand-ma to please buy some nice din dins for litta Heidi. Bernie might just have a litta taste cos Bernie is de offishul tasting pussy cat.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Tuesday, 1 November 2011

Bernie the Prisoner

Today my Mummy did a tewwible fing to her litta Bernie.

Bernie went in to Mummy's bedwoom to hab bweakfast wif her, we had begemite on toast. I like to lick up de begemite, but I don't like the toast. Then I curled up on my Mummy's beddy bies to hab a nap afta bweakfast, but my Mummy had to go to school and wook after dose pengwins* what is in kindergarten and guess wot she did!


Poor Bernie was stuck inside de bedwoom ALL DAY! I meowed and meowed and said 'oh Mummy pwease wet me out!' but my Mummy didn't hear me.

And DEN! She didn't come home for a bewy bewy wong time! I am gwad she still had some of dat toast left ova so I could have a snack during de day.

I was a good Litta Bernie doe, and I didn't go to the toilet in my Mummy's woom because I know that would make my mummy sad. She was bewy bewy sowwee when she came home, and she gave me some dood din dins and we is fwiends again now. But dat was bewy bewy scawy!

(*note from Mummy - the kindergarten children walk like penguins when I teach them so I call them my penguins)

Sunday, 30 October 2011

Sowee I beed away

I am bewy sowwee to all my lowal weaders wot beed wondering where Bernie is. My Gwand-ma goed away to wook after my good fwied Brrrrrr's mummy wot is my Aunty Barbi and she turned off her computa before she goed away. But my mummy left her puta on and now tricky cwever Bernie has found a way to wite his blog on my mummy's computer what is called Tosh.

I hab some bewy exciting news. My mummy is back home again. She was gone for a bewy bewy wong time, but now she beed home and dat makes me a bewy happy Bernie Pussy Cat. Even litta Heidi has missed my mummy and hab been giving her wots of cuddles. But I gib my mummy the mostest cuddles, and I sweep on our bed wif my Mummy every night.

I hope my Gwand Da doesn't miss me. I swept on his bed when my Mummy was away, so he didn't miss my Gwand Ma and my mummy too much, but I sure he unnastand dat now my Mummy is home I wook after her. Oh dear oh dear. I hope Grand da isn't sad. I gib him cuddles tonight while we watch dat tv and den everyfing be ok. Becuase, don't you know dat when a pussy cat gibs you a cuddle den all is right wif the world! Hmm, maybe I should go to one of dose countwis what are on the news and cuddle dose people wat do dat fighting! Den they all be happy and not fight any more.

But I fink I would miss my Mummy and my Gwand-Ma and my Gwand-Da and my litta Heidi. Maybe anovva pussy cat will do dat instead, and say that Bernie sent them.

Yes, dat be a good idea. I need to have a nap now because I'm tired from all dose good ideas what I hab. Good night.

Sunday, 23 October 2011

Counting sleeps

Today Gwand-da tell Bernie dat it be only two more sleeps before my Mummy come home.
Bernie vewy happy about dat so he go and have a dood sleep.
Den me have some din dins and den me have annuvver sleep.
Dat two sleeps and my Mummy is not home.
Me wish my Gwand-da learn to count betta.
Luv fwom a bit gwumpy Bernie

Friday, 14 October 2011

A Vewy happy Birfday for Bernie

Bernie have a vewy happy birfday.
First Bernie and Heidi was fast asleep in our bunk beds wif Bernie on de bottom bunk and Heidi on de top bunk like dis.

Den we hear dat door bell wing and we wun out to butler in de visitor cos even on his birfday, Bernie is still de butler.
Guess who come for a vist? Bernie vewy happy to see Polly come wif her bag to stay for a visit for Bernie's birfday.

Den Gwand-ma make us a booful birfday cake and we have a candle in it and we have a dood birfday party.
We have party hats and all.
We has dood fun.

Luv fwom happy Bernie

Thursday, 13 October 2011

Sad Bernie

Bernie is vewy sad cos no-one say dey comes to Bernie birfday party.
Maybe if me and litta Heidi catches lots of nice mousies to eat den peoples will come??
Love fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 12 October 2011

Pussy foots can't stamp

Yesserday when Bernie was cwanky about his birfday, he twy to stamp him foot cos me see some litta boy do dat one day when he was cwanky.
Me wemember dat and me fink "Dat is a dood fing to do if you is cwanky."
So me twy to stamp my foot but pussy foots is soft and dem do not stamp dood. It just hurt.
Dat not fair. Sumtimes pussies be cwanky too and wot dey do den?
Me fink me go and bite sumone. But who I bite? Me do not want to bite my Gwand-ma or my litta Heidi. Me going to find a big stegosauwus and bite it.
Dat what I do.
Wuv fwom Bernie
PS Do anybody know where me can find a big stegosauwus?

Tuesday, 11 October 2011

A mistake

Oh Meow meow Bernie make a mistake.
Bernie birfday is on Fwiday not Fursday. Dwat! Dat means Bernie has to have a extwa four sleeps cos dat how many pussy cat sleeps between Fursday and fwiday.
Now me has to tell all de peoples to come on Fwiday not on Fursday.
Oh Meow meow meow meow.
Wot a noosance.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 10 October 2011

Invitation to my birfday party

Evewybody is invited to Bernie birfday party soon.
It is on Fursday.
An Bernie will have anuvver party when his Mummy comes home.
Two birfday parties cos Bernie is a vewy important pussy cat.
My Katy and my Hughie can come on Skype. Me hope dem got birfday hats to wear.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 8 October 2011

6 sleeps

Gwand-ma tell Bernie dat it is only 6 sleeps til Bernie have a birfday and he be 10 years old.
Bernie birfday is 14 October. Dat de day Bernie got borned.
Bernie vewy happy about dat.
Heidi been playing wif Wosy lots and lots. Wosy is a dood pussy cat just a litta bit older dan Heidi so dat is why dem is dood fwends.
Dem talks about girl pussy cat fings and dem wuns awound de place.
Me ask Gwand-ma to get a pikcha of dem playin togevver. Dat might be a bit hard cos dem do not stay still togevver. Dem plays chasins.
Gwand-da is still sleepin lots and lots.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 7 October 2011

Sleepin Gwand-da

Gwand-da is sleepin all de time.
Ever since he got back fwom dat place he went, he been sleepin. He got vewy tired dere.
Gwand-ma make dis house vewy tidy and so now Bernie and Heidi is twying to be tidy too.
Bernie say to Litta Heidi, "We must be tidy Heidi"
Heidi say "Why ith you talking in a poem Unca Bernie?"
So Bernie explain about being tidy, and he tell Heidi dat she must sit wif her litta paws lookin cute and wap her tail wound her tidy. She say "Yeth I can do that" and so she wap her tail wound her pwitty and she put her litta paws togever pwitty too.
She a dood tidy Heidi.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Thursday, 6 October 2011

A Litta Problem

Well we is dood fwends wif a litta pussy cat wot lives next door. She is a bwown and black and owange stwipe cat called Wosy but she do not look like a wose. Anyway we is fwends wif her and she comes to our place to play sumtimes.
But - Now Wosy found out dat she likes goin in our house and maybe eat some of Bernie and Heidi dindins.
We do not mind because sometimes you has fwends wot comes to have din dins wif you. Dat is a nice fing so we do not mind if Wosy comes and has din dins wif us cos we is her fwends but when we see her in our house, we all get such a big surpwise dat we makes a big cat fight noise and we all get so fwighten of dat big noise dat Wosy wuns away.
O Meow Meow, wot we do? We always forgets dat Wosy is our fwend and she just comes to visit us like Aunty Mavis and Aunty Kim and Uncle Farver Phil is fwends wot comes to visit sometimes too.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Tuesday, 4 October 2011

Back to de butlewin

We has a nice day today and dat sun was shining and no wain.
So Bernie can go back to bein de butler again.
Me butled Gwand-ma when she comed home fwom de shops. Me did de welcome bit weal dood. Me woll awound lots and lots.
Den me wun up de parf and bwing her in. Gwand-ma vewy glad dat Bernie is doin de butlewin again cos when it waining, Bernie does not do butlewin. Bernie not silly. Bernie do not like going out in de wain. Today Bernie wun outside after din dins to wait in case someone else comes here and Bernie need to butle dem in.
Luv fwom Bernie

Two more dindin fings

Yesserday Gwandma buy us a nice new litta din din what is in a litta tin. It is vewy yummy and heidi and me bofe love it and we wun to eat it and we has a look on dat shelf to see if got some more. It much nicer dan dat silly din dins what we been eatin.
Bernie catched a mousie and eat him up too. Me bwing him in to Gwand-ma bedwoom to show her but she asleep so me just sit dere near de window and eat him. But he vewy cwunchy and dat cwunchy noise wake Gwand-ma up. She say "Oh Bernie I hope you don't get worms from that mousie" so Bernie do not eat all de mousie tummy in case dere be worms in it.
Heidi was playing wif a water pistol and her toy mouse. She pull de tail off her toy mouse and now we can only find de tail. Heidi leave dat water pistol on Gwand-ma chair where Heidi was sleepin and den Gwand-ma come and sit on it and say "What is that cold wet patch?"
Gwand-ma got wet pants on her bum. Me larf a litta bit but not lots cos dat be norty to larf at gwand-ma wif wet bum (he he he)
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 1 October 2011

More wain and a nice new din dins

Today it be waining all day so we stay inside in fwont of dat heater again.
Gwandma give Heidi and me a new din dins. It a litta taste of a stuff called pea and ham soup. Bernie LOVE it. Bernie eat up all his and all Heidi's cos she dont like it. Den Gwandma give Bernie lots more and me eat dat up too.
It yummy.
Now me knows a new dood din dins wot I like.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 30 September 2011

Now we knows

When heidi waked up today I asked her where she go last night when she stay outside all night.
She say she lookin for dem birdies wot make dat caterwailing sound.
Me say "But dat was Wosy who is a pussy cat wot lives next door to us" but Heidi say "No my Hughie thay it be a birdie lookin for hith netht"
Bernie say "Hmmm but it look like a pussy cat to me. My Gwand-ma and me see it wunning away and it look just like Wosy"
"Oh well," say litta Heidi, "Me wath looking all night for puthy catth and birdieth what maketh thothe noitheth. Me wanted to thee if they found apple pieth"
Now Bernie vewy mystified. Why do Heidi fink dose pussies has apple pies? Just because she think dat a apple pie was a moon cos it was wound and yellow, that do not mean that all the pussies wot yowl at de moon is weally yowling at apple pies. ,,, Does it?
Oh dear dat make Bernie head sore. Me need to go and have a litta nap to stop my poor head fwom spinning wound and wound. Meowmmph! Girl pussy cats is vewy hard to unnerstand.
Luv fwom Bernie who is a vewy sensible boy pussy cat.

Heidi was norty

Last night Bernie sleep on Gwand-ma bed. Dat because Gwand-da is away and my Mummy is away and so we bofe be lonely. So we keep each uvver companies.
But Heidi be norty. She stay outside all night. Gwand-ma go and look out de door for her and we bofe wundewing where she be. Bernie go and look for her but he cant find her.
Den dis morning when Aunty Mavis come to go for a walk wif Gwand-ma we go and look and dere she is asleep on de back of Gwand-da new arm chair.
We glad to see she is safe so we do not wouse on her for staying out all night.
Me ask her later when she waked up.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 29 September 2011

Cold and waining

It be cold and waining and lots of winds.
Bernie and Heidi stay in warm lounge woom and we sleep on dem nice comfy lounge chairs. Dat is de best fing to do when it is cold and waining. If anyone do anyfing else on dis sort of day dem silly.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Tuesday, 27 September 2011


Last night and de night before dat, when Gwand-ma gone to bed and me and Litta Heidi is twying to get some sleep too, dere be a stwange yowling noise in our backyard.
Litta Heidi sit up and listen carefully. She get a bit fwightened and she say "Unca Bernie what ith that thtrange noithe?"
Bernie say "Dat is some naughty pussy cats yowling out dere."
"Oh" say litta Heidi, "Ith they yowling at de moon?" and Bernie say "Me don't know" and Litta Heidi say "I uthed to yowl at de moon onthe" and Bernie say "No dat was not de moon you was yowling at. Dat was Gwand-ma's apple pie wot you was yowling at" and Heidi say "Oh yeth that ith right. I got mikthed up"
Poor litta Heidi. She wanted to yowl at de moon and she know de moon wound and yellow so when she see a wound yellow fing she fink it de moon.
Anyway, when we just talkin about dat yowling outside, Gwand-ma come out and say "What is that noise out there? I hope it is not one of our pussy cats?" and she vewy glad to see it not us cos we is dood pussy cats sittin in de lounge woom but we is listening to dat yowly noise. Gwand-ma go out de back door and dose yowling cats wunned away.
Dood now we can get some sleep.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 24 September 2011

Oh Meow Gwand-ma has to help me

Me cannot get dose pickchas of me and Heidi sitting in shade off dat camewa and onto my blog so Gwand-ma has to help me please.

Taking dood advice

My cousin Polly give me dood advice. She say I should sit outside unner dose twees all day. So Bernie do just dat today. Gwand-ma take some pikchas of Bernie sittin unner de twee. Me go and get her camera and get dat pikchas off it and put dem in my blog. Now where dat sticky tape gone???
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 23 September 2011

A quiet day

Today be vewy quiet.
My Mummy and my Gwand-da gone away and my Gwand-ma goes to dat wadio stashun all day sept for din dins time she comes home and sees us pussy cats.
When she go away again, Bernie get shut inside de house and Heidi get shut outside de house so when Gwand-ma come home Bernie cannot go and butler her inside.
But guess what! Litta Heidi go and butler Gwand-ma inside all on her own and she do it weal dood.
Gwand-ma tell me all about it.
De only mistake she make is she gone to de wong car. We got two cars parked dere and Heidi wun to de one what Gwand-ma was not in.
Bernie needs to explain to Litta Heidi dat de persons come home in de car wot dwives up to de house not in de uvver one wot sittin dere all day.
Dat might be a bit hard for a litta pussy cat to understand, but we twy and explain it.
Den she wun up de parf weal dood and show Gwand-ma how to wun in de house.
Wow she turning into a vewy dood butler pussy.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 22 September 2011

Heidi do her first butlewing job.

Today Gwandma go to de shops and when she come home, litta Heidi do de butlewing.
Bernie was going to do it but litta Heidi wun out too and den she wun wight up de parf and show Gwand-ma how to go in de door.
She do it vewy dood.
Bernie vewy pwoud of her. Bernie teach her dood.
But one pwoblem. De butler supposed to show de person how to go in de door but NO-ONE can wiggle deir bum like Heidi so if peoples twy to walk like Heidi den dey fall over.
Lucky Gwand-ma do not twy to walk like Heidi.
We just larf at how she wiggle her bum.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 21 September 2011

Gwasshopper chargers

My Katy and my Hughie tells me dat gwasshoppers and birdies does not need chargers. Dem has a sleep. Dat better dan what Gwand-ma say. She say we play too hard and dem get deaded. She say Heidi bite dat gwasshopper and dat kill it. Oh No! we vewy sad about dat. Poor litta gwasshopper.
Bernie sad cos him Mummy gone away.
Bernie KNOW she gone away and she not here but Bernie can’t help it. He walk awound de house saying Meow Meow Meow and lookin for her.
Oh Bernie sad. Bernie miss his Mummy alweady.
Den Bernie goes and gets a cuddle fwom Gwand-ma.
Now Bernie has to start dat “waitin til my Mummy come home” again.

Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 20 September 2011

Dood News

Bernie can post to his blog again.
Now Bernie can tell you all de news what happen while he not postin to his blog.
First of all my Mummy is goin away again but not for a long long time only a short long time.
And my Gwand-da is goin away for a short short long time.
Dat means Gwand-ma and me and Heidi be on ourselves.
Bernie is de man of de house.
Now here is sumfing dat Bernie and Heidi need.
Heidi catch a gwasshopper of de locust sort outside. She bwing it inside and play wif it. It hop awound and she have dood fun. But den it go slow and stop hoppin. She wun to Bernie and say "Unca Bernie, what ith wrong with my grathhopper? It thtopped hopping"
Bernie say "Hmmmm maybe it battewy is flat." So we take it and put it on Gwand-ma phone charger wot sittin dere on de bench. We leave it dere for a long time but it still do not hop. Maybe we need a speshul charger. Do anyone know where we get a special gwass hopper charger?
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 16 September 2011

Bad news

This post is being done by Grand-ma
Bernie tried to update his public profile and he accidentally put in his correct birthdate which is 14 October 2001. He is very proud of the fact that soon he will be 10 years old.
Anyway, because he is under 13, his google account got blocked.
He is very upset about it because he wants to blog and tell all his friends what he is doing.
Grandma has paid the 30 cents to get it unblocked and written to explain that in human terms Bernie is nearly 55 years old.
Poor Bernie is bereft and has gone outside to mope.
If any of his friends would like to put in a comment to show their support for this magnificent and talented pussy cat, I am sure he would be greatly consoled and heartened.
Grand-ma aka Grand-moogi, Mum, Margaret

Wednesday, 14 September 2011

Warm day

Today is a vewy warm and sunny day.
Bernie helps Gwand-ma put de washin on de line.
Den he give her lots of cuddles cos she not feeling vewy well.
We also do some more butler pwactice for Heidi. She still shy. She used to wun away when sumone come. She wun away and hide. Dat why she called Heidi so Bernie twying to teach her not to be shy. She has to learn to go and say hello to visitors and bwing dem in de house. Today she doing a litta bit of work expewience.
Katy Mummy tell us dat Katy wead dat book about de bwave koala herself. She SOOOOOO clever.
Bernie like dat stowy about de litta koala.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 13 September 2011

Gwand-ma is vewy silly

Hi dere!
Just now Bernie was eatin some din dins.
Gwand-ma come along and she say "Oh is you eatin your din dins Mr. Bernie?"
Wot do she fink I is doing?
I is not doin de Highland Fling!!!
Of course I eatin my din dins!
Bernie eats lots of din dins. Sumtimes he eat sumone elses din dins if dem is not lookin. - If it taste nice Bernie will have a little bit of it. Serve dem wight for not lookin.
Anyway Bernie is de offishul food tasting person in dis house so he is allowed to taste evewyfing dat he wants to taste.
He do not like yukky vegeboos.

Saturday, 10 September 2011

But me do be de butler on cold days sumtimes

My Gwand-da be sick and my Gwand-ma and my Mummy go sumwhere. Bernie and Heidi stay home and mind Gwand-da.
When dem ladies comes home, Bernie goes and be de butler because if Bernie don't den maybe Gwand-da will and him is sick.
Anyway Bernie do not mind being de butler to let his Mummy and his Gwand-ma come home even if is it a cold day.
Luv fwom Bernie

Cold again

Today bes cold again.
Litta Heidi and Bernie decide dat we stay inside in fwont of dat heater. Dat is de best place when it cold.
Gwand-ma say dat de butler does not have to work on vewy cold days. It in de work contwact.
Now why does it be cold again today? Me do not know why dat happen.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 7 September 2011


Today Bernie has a WDO. Dat stand for Wostered Day Off.
When sumone comes to dis house dey has to find out how to come in demselves.
Maybe Heidi will be a substitute butler but she is not finished her twaining.
Bernie enjoys his WDO. He earned it dood by doin de butlewing all de time.
Bernie is like his Unca Tim. We does not get paid overtime. Instead we has a wostered day off to make up for it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 6 September 2011

slippers knitting

Today my Gwand-ma be knittin some slippers for my Mummy's fwend wot got cold foots.
Dem slippers has lots of wools hangin off dem and dey gets mixed up so Bernie has to help Gwand-ma by chasin dose bits of wool and catch dem when dey wiggle.
All de time dose needles go clickety clickety and dose wools go wiggley wiggley and Bernie has to go chasey chasey and gwab gwab wif paws and bitey bitey to catch dem.
Phew it hard work.
Knittin makes Bernie get vewy tired.
Especially knittin dose slippers.
Me has to have a big west after all dat wool chasin and catchin.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Sunday, 4 September 2011

Lots of Butler twaining

Today Gwand-ma and My Mummy gone sumwhere so Bernie spend de day teachin litta Heidi about de butlewin.
She twying vewy hard to wemember all de bits.
First listen carefully for when a car comes and stop at our place. Den wun outside vewy fast and awound to de fwont and go to de car and get dem peoples out of de car.
Show dem dat you is glad dey come by doin somefing nice and pussyish like wollin on de gwound and puttin your paws in de air.
Den get up and wun up de fwont parf to show dem de way inside. When dey open dat fwont door, wun in first to show dem how to go in.
Dat is what me was teachin litta Heidi today.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 3 September 2011

Vewy confusing situashun for de butler

Dis evening, de car come and stop at our house.
Bernie wun out to meet de peoples coming home because he is de butler on duty.
Bernie woll over on his back and put his paws in de air which is pussy cat butler signs of "Hello you is welcome"
BUT, dat car stwaight away back out and go again!!
Oh Meow Meow MEOOOWW
What dat all about?
Bernie look and look at it and can't believe his eyes.
Bernie wub his eyes wif his paws but he can still see dat car goin away.
Dat vewy stwange.
Maybe Bernie wesign as de butler cos it too befuddling for a pussy cat.
Luv fwom Bernie

Butler in twaining

Heidi is learning to be a butler.
So far she knows how to go and see peoples when dey comes to visit.
She wuns out de fwont.
Next she needs to learn how to go up to dem and say meow for hello and den walk down de parf in fwont of dem and show dem de way in de door.
It is a vewy complicated job for a pussy cat so it might take a long time for her to learn.
We see how she goes.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 1 September 2011


My Mummy tell me dat today be de first say of spwing so me suppose dat means me has to spwing off de chair and do sumfing spwingy.
Me twy to do dat but oh meow meow me could not be bovvered.
Why does we has to spwing evewywhere just because it is Spwing?
Dat silly.
We do not keep adding fings up in Summer.
Me do like to woll over and get a tummy tickle in Ortum but me do not win anyfing in Winter so me not going to spwing evewywhere in Spwing.
Whoever made up dose wules is silly.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 31 August 2011

A day off for de Butler

Evewybody is allowed to have a day off. Even butlers. So today Bernie decide dat he has a day off.
When Gwand-ma come home, Bernie goes to meet her but he do not want to show her de way inside.
She orta orlweady know dat way inside anyway.
Bernie just woll over on de parfway in de sun and stick his legs in air so he get lots of nice sun shining on his tummy.
Dat vewy nice.
Me do not want to be de butler ALL DE TIME.
Me has a litta holiday.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 29 August 2011

More Flower Cats

Well Litta Heidi likes sitting in dat flower pot. She sit dere lots today. She sitting dere in de warm sun. She say she not de only flower cat because my dood fwend, Aussie wot died and got buwied in de back yard is gwowing into a Daffodil. He always gwows into a Daffodil evewy Spwing. He do not have his flower yet but when he do have his flower my Mummy will take a dood pikcha of it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 28 August 2011

A Flower Cat

All my dood fwends wot wead my blog know dat Heidi is a white tortoise shell pussy cat. You can see dat when you look at her pictures.
My Aunty Lily tell me dat in China dem pussy cats is called "Flower Cats" cos dem look pwitty like flowers.
Me tell litta Heidi dat so guess what she do!
She go and sit in a flower pot.
My Mummy taked a pikcha of her so we can show evewybody and my Aunty Lily.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 27 August 2011

Tidy up de garden

Today we be vewy busy and tidy up de garden.
My Mummy mow lots and lots and my Gwand-da cut bwanches off dose messy twees and also cut branches off dat messy pommy gwan ate twee wot had funny pommy gwan ates on it.
My Aunty Lily love dose pommy gwan ates so we give de best ones to her.
De uvvers take a big twailer full of wubbish away and get wid of it.
Heidi an me get vewy tired just watchin.
But it look nicer when it tidy except we don know where to hide. Hmmm we can still find places to hide and we got a big play yard to play in.
wuv fwom ol Bernie.

Friday, 26 August 2011

Lots of butlewin work

You knows how Bernie is de butler?
Well when sumbody comes here Bernie ORLWAYS goes and bwing dem inside.
He wuns out to meet dem at de car and walk wif dem to de house and when dey open de door, Bernie wun in first to show dem de way.
Dat cos Bernie is a BEWY DOOD butler.
Today me got vewy busy doin my butlewin.
Gwand-da car come and stop out de fwont and Bernie just wunning out to get him when Gwand-ma car come and stop out de fwont too.
Oh Meow Meow! Two peoples need de butler at once.
What I do? I wun from Gwand-da to Gwand-ma and back to Gwand-da again.
Den I tells dem to bofe come in togevver and so dat wot dey do.
Me work it out dood.
Bernie is de best multi skill butler in de world.
Wuv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 25 August 2011

A galloping Heidi

Bernie orlweady tell evewyone about how it be a nice sunny day today.
Well Heidi was having lots of fun wunning vewy fast and she make a galloping noise cos she wun so fast.
Bernie say to her dat she should not make dat galloping noise when my Mummy at home because my Mummy fall of a horsey when she visiting my cousin Bethany and if she hear a galloping noise it might fwighten her.
Heidi say "Oh that ith very thad. I did not know that Aunty Anne fell off a horthey.
Did thhe hurt herthelf?" and Bernie say "She got lots of howwible bwuises"
Then Heidi say "And did thhe drop any thtittheth from her knitting?"
Bernie say "Me do not know about dat. Me do not know if My Mummy was knitting when she widing dat horsey."
Heidi say "But Aunty Anne ith alwayth knitting tho thhe mutht have been doing her knitting."
Oh dear my poor Mummy. She fall off a horsey and muck up her knittin!!!
Luv fwom Bernie.

Sunny day

Today it be a nice sunny day.
Yesserday it be a sunny day too
Heidi and me gone outside and played lots of games in de nice sunny day. Den we has a litta nap in a warm sunny spot but we puts our paws over our eyes so dat sun dont get in dem while we is having a nap.
We has cat naps cos we is pussy cats.
Me just wun inside bewy kwik to wite dis blog for my fwends to wead.
Now I wuns outside again to do more playin and nappin in de sun.
But first I go and get a litta snak.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 22 August 2011

A nice new chair for Bernie

My Mummy and my Gwand-ma go in de car and when dey come home dey bwing a nice new chair for Bernie.
Bernie be vewy kind and let Gwand-da sit in it but it weally be Bernie's chair.
Today Aunty Mavis come and she hab a sit in it and also my Mummy have a sit in it but Bernie sit in it most of de time.
Gwand-da sit in Gwand-ma's chair when he weadin his book cos dat new chair be Bernie's chair and Bernie was sittin in it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 18 August 2011

Oh deawie me Meow

Gwandma was just giving me a nice cuddle and den she put me down but she do not look where she puttin me and she put me in de bin.
Bernie was a litta bit offended and me walk away vewy quickly wif a speshul bum wiggle wot mean "Hmmmph! is dat wot you fink of Bernie!"
But me is OK. Gwandma was just asking Bernie if he will help her make de din dins. Of course Bernie will help make de din dins. Bernie loves to help make de din dins. Bernie is de main tasting person for when anyone is makin din dins. Bernie always has to do de tasting.
So Bernie is just going to go and sit on de kitchen table now on top of de new gwiller wot Gwandma buy cos de uvver one bwoke. Me will wait dere until Gwand-ma come and cook de din dins.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 17 August 2011

Waining again

Today it beed waining again so Bernie make a dood wesolushion.
Bernie is not going to play outside on any day wot ends wif a "ay" sound cos dose days is always got wain. Me notice dat.
Today be Wensday and it be waining and last Wensday it beed waining and it beed waining on a Sunday and a Munday. All dose days has a "ay" sound on de end so now Bernie notice dat so if de day has a "ay" sound on de end of it, Bernie stay in bed cos he know it going to be waining.
Bernie is vewy clever to notice dat. It save Bernie lots of twouble cos he do not have to go outside and get wet before he know it be waining.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 15 August 2011

Spwing coming

It be vewy exciting. Me fibnk spwing is coming. Dat gwass is startin to gwow and so is dem weeds.
Heidi and me plays lions and tigers wunning in de long gwass. Now Heidi find a twee stump and she sit on it and be queen lioness lookin awound.
Bernie ask Gwand-ma to take a pikcha of her sitting dere but she jump off when Gwand-ma cweeping awound dere wif de camewa.
Now we be tired and go back to sleep
Luv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 14 August 2011

Meow, purr, lick

Dis what I wants to put in my blog.
Meow meow, purr purrr litta lick.
Lie down and have a sleep
purr purr look awound get up sit down and rub my face against a owange folder. Give Gwand-ma a cuddle and rub my head on her face. Den more licks
pur purr lick lick
luv fweom Bernie

Saturday, 13 August 2011

My Mummy home now

Today is a vewy dood day cos my Mummy come home.
Gwand-da tell me dat my Mummy come home soon and Bernie should go and wait for her.
Me go outside and wait at de back gate but she come home to de fwont.
Dat twick me a litta bit but me hear her callin me when she come home and me wun inside and get a cuddle fwom my Mummy.
Bernie is a vewy happy pussy cat now.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 12 August 2011

Bov-ver! Got de day wong

Bov-ver Bov-ver Me know dat my Mummy come home on Sattyday and me fink today be Sattyday. Me been sittin out dere waitin for my Mummy.
Now Gwand-da just tell me dat today be Fwiday and tomowwow be Sattyday.
Me must have lost count when me countin my sleeps.
Oh Meow meow. It not easy bein a pussy cat!
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 11 August 2011

Cold again

It always being cold here. Maybe we turning into Tasmania so soon we can see Katy and Hughie.
Last night Bernie had a little accident. Well it was not weally a accident cos me did it on purpose.
Me and Heidi was in Gwand-ma and Gwand-da bedwoom. We sleepin on deir bed.
Den Bernie get off cos he want to go and do a wee. Bernie cannot open dat door so he look in dat ensuite to find a litter tway but it not dere.
Bernie say his speshul little mow what means "Bernie needs to use the litter tray" but Gwand-ma do not know what dat means so she just say "Oh what you want Bernie" and she go back to sleep.
Bernie cwossing his legs but den he see a hole in dat floor. It be de dwain hole so Bernie do his wee in dat hole. Hmmm it vewy hard to scwape on de tiles to cover it up. Gwand-ma hear Bernie twyin to scwape so den she know what Bernie was talkin about.
She come in de ensuite and she say Bernie is a vewy dood Pussy cat cos he do his wee down dat hole.
Now Gwand-ma knows dat when Bernie say dat speshul little mow, dat because Bernie need de litter tway.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 10 August 2011

Cuddles appointments

Dis morning, Gwand-da gone to school and Gwand-ma getting weady to go and do sumfing and my Mummy not here cos she away visiting my cousin Befany.
Gwand-ma say to Bernie "I am sorry Bernie that I won't be here to give you cuddles. Maybe you should arrange with Heidi to give each other cuddles".
Bernie fink dat a dood idea so he say to litta Heidi, "Litta Heidi, do you fink we can gib each uvver cuddles when dere is no-one at home to give us cuddles?
Heidi say "Hmmm I think I needth to look in my diary"
Bernie say "Wot? Has you got a diary, Litta Heidi?"
Heidi say "Well me doeth not know. What do a diary lookth like?"
Bernie say "Well if you does not even know what a diary looks like, why do you have to check it?"
and Heidi say "Well that ith what Grand-da alwayth thayth when thomeone athkth him if he can do thomething. He thayth 'I need to check my diary.'"
"Well what do Gwand-da diary look like litta Heidi?" asks Mr. Bern.
"It black" say litta Heidi.
Now we lookin evewywhere to see if we can find a diary wot is Heidi's.
We get so tired lookin everywhere dat we curl up togevver on de chair and has a sleep.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 9 August 2011

Anuvver cold day

Today be anuvver cold day and Bernie miss his Mummy.
Bernie has to go and get cuddles fwom Gwand-ma and she wonder why Bernie keeps comin to get cuddles all de time.
It just because Bernie misses his Mummy and Bernie likes cuddles and Bernie Mummy is not here to give Bernie all his cuddles what he needs evewy day.
So dat why Bernie go to Gwand-ma to get cuddles all day.
Oh when my Mummy comes home?
Luv fwom Bernie


Bernie forget to do some blog yesserday cos it cold and wainin and Bernie stay inside and sleep on de chair in de warm lounge woom.

Monday, 8 August 2011

Oh dat wot it is.

Clever Katy tell me wot it is. It be Shakes beer. My Mummy tell me when you shakes beer it get all fizzy and we must not do dat. It is a bard fing to do. Dat why dat man called Shakes Beer is called dat bard.
Today Farver Fill came and visited us and Bernie and him played a twick on my Gwand-da.
Bernie was playin at a house up dis stweet when Farver Fill came past on his way walkin to visit us. We walked back to dis house togevver cos we is dood fwends.
Farver Fill goes to de back door and Bernie goes to de fwont door.
Farver Fill wing de back door bell wot sound zactly like de fwont door bell. Just den Farver Fill call out “Helloooo” and Bernie call out “Meeeoooow” at de same time.
Gwand-da say “Ooooh which door do I go to?” and he come and open de fwont door and in walk Bernie. He say “Do you wing dat door bell Mr. Bernie?” Farver Fill walk in de back door at dat same time and Gwand-da get a big surpwise.
Heee heee heee we larfin.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 6 August 2011

Fizzy Dwink

Today my Mummy has gone to see my cousin Befany and teach her all about dat fizzy dwinks.
Me telling Heidi about it.
Heidi say "Ith you thure thhe teaching Bethany about Fiththy drinkth?"
Me say "Well it sumfing like dat." Maybe it be 'wobble milk' or 'wiggle tea'"
Me can't wemember wot it be but me know it sumfing like dat.
Me has to fink about it lots and lots so me can figure it out.
Me wemember finkin about sumfing wot my Mummy dwink gettin all wiggled.
Ow Meow meow. Wot it be?

Tuesday, 2 August 2011

A stwange litta habit

Me notice dat litta Heidi do a stwange litta habit.
Sumtimes before she eat sum dindins, she need to hab a cuddle.
She go near dat dindins bowl and say 'meow' and den she lift up her back to show Gwand-ma dat she want a cuddle.
Gwand-ma pick her up and give her a litta cuddle den she jump down and eat sum din dins.
Dat vewy stwange.
Bernie ask litta Heidi why she do dat.
"Well," say litta Heidi, "Alwayth when me want thome din dinth me say 'meow' to Grand-ma and thee alwayth pick me up and thay "Wot do you want little Heidi? Do you want thome din dinth?" and then she get me thome dindinth. Me only do that when the din dinth bowl ith empty and Grand-ma needth to put thome more din dinth in it."
Bernie say "Oh me did not notice dat. So now you fink you must always hab a cuddle before new dindins?"
"Yeth," say litta Heidi, "It ith nithe to have cuddleth and dindinth"
Bernie fink she is wight about dat.
Cuddles is always nice and so is dindins.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 1 August 2011

Dat sweet litta pussy

Today Bernie was standin just outside dat glass door out de back and me could see into de lounge woom.
Me wanted to come in but dat door was shut.
Me sitting dere waitin.
Den Litta Heidi see me and she wun acwoss to Gwandma. Me could hear her saying her litta 'Mew' what she say when she asking politely for sumting. She always scwew up her litta nose when she say dat cute litta 'mew.'
Gwand-ma say "What do you want litta Heidi?" and litta Heidi say dat 'mew' again and wun to de back door and Gwand-ma follow her and see dat Bernie waitin to come in.
Gwand-ma open dat door and Bernie come in. He say 'fanks you' to litta Heidi for tellin Gwand-ma dat Bernie at de door and wants to come in.
She such a cute pussy.
Love fwom Bernie

Sunday, 31 July 2011

Good bye Monsieur Claude

Today Monsieur Claude came to visit. He tell litta Heidi dat he going to lib in Sydney to be near his litta cousins what is Mr. Nicklas gwand-childwen.
Heidi say she vewy sowwy to say good bye and she hopes he have a dood time in Sydney.
Den she come and tell her Unca Bernie.
Me wun out and say Goodbye to M. Claude and den he wun home to Mr. Nicklas. He say he has to make sure dat Mr. Nicklas pack his din dins bowl.
Luv fwom Bernie

Saturday, 30 July 2011

Peep-Po Games

Bernie see litta Heidi sittin dere wif a wowwied look on her cute litta face. Bernie say "Wot is you wowwied about Litta Heidi?"
Litta Heidi say "Me worried about my Grand-ma. Thee ith going thtrange"
"Oh dat is quite normal for Gwand-ma" say Bernie, "But pwecisely wot is you wowwied about now in particuticuticlar?"
"Well," say litta Heidi. "Me wath thitting there and Grand-ma put her head around de door and thay 'Peep-po' and pull her head back quick ath quick.
Then thee do it again. Then thee go down lower and do it again.
Alwayth thee thtickth her head around the door and thay that 'Peep-po'"<
Bernie say "Well Gwandma is just playing a litta game wif Litta Heidi. It called a Peep Po Game."
"Oh ith that what it ith" say litta Heidi.
Then Heidi thinks for a few minutes and then she say "Unca Bernie, you know that funny owl bird what cometh in that tree thumtimeth and thitth there thaying 'Hoot Hoo'?'
Bernie say "Yes me wemember dat"
"Well maybe," say litta Heidi, "it playing that game too and it saying 'Poop Poo'"
Bernie fwown and say "Dat not vewy nice to sit in a twee and yell out 'Poop Poo' all night. Next time it come we betta go and ask dat owl birdie if he want to play Peep Pos"
So Bernie will let evewybody know what happens next time dat owl birdie comes and sits in our twee outside and makes dat funny noise all night.
Luv fwom Bernie an Heidi

Friday, 29 July 2011

Sittin on coats

Yesserday litta Heidi found Gwand-da suit coat on de bed. She get up and have a dood sleep on it.
When Gwand-da come and see her sleepin on it, him twy to wouse at her but him larfin.
Bernie fink "Oooh dat a funny fing for a pussy cat to do. Me can do dat too"
So today when Gwand-da was gettin dwessed to go to a speshul place tonight he got him bestest suit coat out and put it on de bed while he has a shower. So Bernie jump up and have a litta sleep on it.
Gwand-da come and he say "Oh oh just because Heidi did it, Bernie thinks he can do it too"
Hee hee dat wight. Bernie got de idea fwom Heidi.
We all had a big larf.
Love fwom Bernie

Thursday, 28 July 2011

Heidi waitin an waitin

Heidi still waitin for her gumnut twee to gwow.
She sittin dere an waitin an waitin.
Me go out to see her and she say "Unca Bernie, how long do it take for a gumnut tree to grow?"
Me say "Me do not know but me ask all de peoples wot wead my blog. Maybe sum one will know."
Heidi say "Oh thankthyou Unca Bernie. You ith a very good Unca Bernie"
Den me say "Why doesn't you come inside litta Heidi? It is too cold to be waitin outside all de time. You needs to come in an have a dood sleep in fwont of dat warm heater. An you needs to have soime din dins"
So Heidi comes inside for a litta bit. When she sittin in fwont of dat heater she say "Do you know what me thaw Unca Bernie? Me thaw George plant a bone in the garden at hith houthe. Maybe he goin to grow a big thumthing. What thort of thing will he grow from that bone?"
Bernie do not know what gwows fwom dat bone but Bernie do not want to see it. Bernie get a bit fwightened.
Me and Heidi hopes sumone can tell us how long it take for her gumnut twee to gwow.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 26 July 2011

Doin sum diggin

Bernie Mummy gwow sum dood fings in de garden. She be vewy cleber.
Bernie and Heidi wants to gwow sum fings too so we go out in dat backyard to talk about it.
Heidi say "Doeth you know how to grow thingth Unca Bernie?"
Bernie say "Of course me does litta Heidi. First we gotta dig dat garden."
"Oh me very good at digginth" say litta Heidi and stwaight away she start diggin in de garden.
She vewy dood. She dig and dig. Bernie do sum diggin too.
Just den Bernie look up and see Litta Heidi sittin in de middle of dat patch wot she dig.
Bernie say "Why you sittin dere litta Heidi?"
Litta heidi say "Ooopth me forgot. When me dig a hole dat ith uthually to go toilet but me forgot. Ooh dear. What I do now Unca Bernie?"
"Bernie say "Jus cover dat up and we dig annuvver hole somewhere else" so off we go to dig more holes.
Den me say to litta Heidi that we has to get seeds. Heidi say "Oooh me knowth what theedth me get. Me get thome gumnut theedth and gwow a gum nut tree"
So off she wun and get a gumnut in her litta mouf and she put it in dat hole. Den she cover it up and she sittin dere waitin for it to gwow.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 21 July 2011

Bernie beed busy mindin de house

Today bernie beed vewy busy mindin de house cos his Mummy and his Gwand-da was at school and his Gwand-ma was at dat wadio stashun.
First Bernie walk all awound de inside of de house. Den Bernie have a bit of din dins and a litta sleep on de comfy chair.
Den Bernie walk outside and den Bernie has a litta sumfing to eat.
Den Bernie has a sleep on de comfy chair.
Den Bernie eat some din dins and den he have a litta sleep on dat comfy chair.
Den Bernie has a sleep on de lounge woom floor and den he look out de back door.
Den Bernie go inside and have a nice din dins and a nice long sleep on de comfy chair.
Den Gwand-ma and Mummy come home for lunch time so Bernie go out de fwont door.

Bernie has a nice sleep all afternoon on de chair on de fwont vewandah. It a comfy chair wif a padded cushon.
Bernie Mummy stay home but Bernie still takin care of de house.
Litta Heidi helps. She goes for a sleep on dat comfy chair in de lounge woom while Bernie mind de vewandah.
When Gwand-ma come home, Bernie walk down de fwont parf to meet her and woll on de gwound to get a tummy tickle. But silly Gwand-ma do not give Bernie a tummy tickle. She just say "Oh Bernie, the butler is not supposed to roll over on the ground" and then she go inside. Bernie go inside too so he can have some din dins.
You see how hard Bernie work all day mindin de house.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 19 July 2011

Bernie got a Gwand-da too

Evewybody fink dat Bernie jus got a Mummy an a Gwandma and a litta Heidi.
But Bernie got a Gwand-da too. Bernie ask his Mummy to take a pikcha of Bernie an his Gwand-da havin a dood sleep togevver after we had a dood man talk.
Here it is. Bernie will get pikchas of evewybody else and show dem to de peoples wot wead his blog.

Wednesday, 13 July 2011

Vewy exciting fing

My Mummy got a new magic book. It a eeeee-book.
Me find it and have a look at it.
Me goin to find stowies about snuggle-pot and cuddle-pie and learn about Gumnut babies.
Love from Bernie.

Monday, 11 July 2011

Gumnut babies

My Mummy and My Gwand-ma was doin some lots of knittin.
Dey maked jumpers for Katy and Hugh. Dat jumper for Katy was not as warm as dat uvver one and sometimes it beed dark. My Mummy taked a foto and I tell her to put dem fotos on my blog for me so evewybody can see dem. You can see how dat jumper do not be vewy warm and it is dark too.
My Mummy also knitted litta hats to match dem jumpers. My Mummy knitted a litta knob on top of dem hats so dem looks like gumnuts. Bernie told litta Heidi about dat so guess what she did!
She go and play wif a gumnut again for such a long time.
Evewybody laughing at her. She jump on dat gumnut and chase it all over dat kitchen floor.
My Gwand-ma say dat Katy and Hugh look like Gumnut Babies.
Bernie do not know what Gumnut Babies is.
Sum one has to tell Bernie about dat please.

You can see how dis jumper be not vewy warm.

And you can see how dis jumper be vewy dark.

Sunday, 3 July 2011

Wasted our time

Well Bernie an Heidi has been goin outside evewy now and den to make sure dat nobody pinched our backyard. Now my Mummy told me dat nobody pinch our backyard cos it too big and dey needs vewy big twailer to pinch it.
We been wastin our time!
Today a vewy nice pwincess come and I sit on her lap and hab a cuddle. She bees vewy nice and me hopes she come back sumday.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Thursday, 30 June 2011

Not much happenin

Not much is happenin here. It be a bit cold so Bernie an Heidi spend lots of times inside in fwont of dat heater.
Sumtimes we goes outside to make sure dat nobody pinched our backyard.
Heidi is gwowin up into a nice pussy cat but she still got dat vewy cute litta miaow wot she scwew up her litta nose wif.
Bernie like talkin to her and watch her scwew up dat cute litta nose when she say Mow.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 21 June 2011

A Vewy important knitting helping cat

Bernie is a vewy important knitting helping cat.
My Gwand-ma and my Mummy is knitting fings for my litta cousins called Katy and Hugh.
Dem lives a long way away where it be vewy cold so we knit nice warm fings for dem.
Now my Gwand-ma and my Mummy has to make sure dat when dey is knitting, dat fing wot dey knit is nice and warm.
Dat how Bernie can help.
Bernie sit on deir lap and test out dat knitting to see if it nice and warm.
Dis is a vewy important and hard job wot Bernie do.
Bernie ask his Mummy to take a pikcha of him doin dis hard job so Bernie can show his dood fwends wot weads his blog.
Dis is a pikcha of Bernie makin sure dat Katy noo jumper is vewy warm.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 20 June 2011

Don't believe evewyfing you wead

Me just had a vewy stwange talk wif my Gwand-ma
She say "If I give you a pat will you bite me today?"
Bernie say "Wot? Of course Bernie do not bite you. Bernie never bite him Gwand-ma"
and Gwand-ma say "But yesserday you bite Gwand-ma. You even wite it on your blog"
And Bernie say "Oh do I? Me do not wemember dat. Now you should not believe evewyfing you wead on dat internet you know"
Gwand-ma say "Well I never heard of such a thing! You are a vewy stwange cat, Mr Bern"
"oh yes" says Mr Bern (dat's wot Gwand-ma call me sumtimes),"Me likes bein a stwange cat. You can get ordinawy cats evewywhere but Bernie is a vewy speshul cat."
"Oh" says Gwand-ma, "I think I needs a cup of tea"

Tiny post


Sunday, 19 June 2011

Bov ver

Bernie do not like it when peoples bovver him.
Bernie was having a nice sleep on de lounge when Gwand-ma come and start twyin to play wif Bernie.
Bernie do not like dat so when Gwand-ma bend down low to pat Bernie on de Head, Bernie bite her!
Go away Gwand-ma and let Bernie have a sleep on de lounge.

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

Oh Me forgot

Me forgot. Me catched annuvver mousie and quick as anyfing me eated it up. Me forgot about dem worms.
Now my Mummy has to wing my Unca Jim and ask if dat tablet wot him give me will stop worms fwom dat mousie or do I need a nuvver one tablet.
Oh dear me is a silly pussy cat.
Me can't help it.
Me catch dat mousie and quick as anyfing me eat him up.
Luv fwom feelin silly Bernie.

Tuesday, 14 June 2011

Good Ol' Unca Jim

Today my Mummy take me and litta Heidi to see our Unca Jim wot is de vet.
Him give us bofe a litta needle and we do not cwy cos we is bwave pussy cats.
Unca Jim also give us a dood worm tablet each so dem norty worms goes away out of our tummies.
And Guess What?
Bernie losed weight.
Bernie losed 700 gms.
Dat is a lot for a pussy cat.
Dat like 7kgs for a gwowed up human.
Unca Jim say dat Bernie is a vewy dood pussy cat for losin weight.
My Gwandma wowwied dat me lose weight because me got worms in my tummy but Bernie fink dat havin worms in my tummy should make me weigh more!
Now Bernie is not going to eat any more norty mousies dat he catch or if he do forget and eat one, Bernie get a worm tablet fwom his Mummy stwaight away.

When we go back home, My Mummy let us get out of our baskets because it is just a litta short twip. Bernie vewy happy to jump out of de car and wun inside to de house as soon as my Mummy open dat car door but litta Heidi like going for a wide in de car so she will not get out.
She hide under dat fwont seat and my Mummy twy and twy to get her out. Den my Mummy and my Gwand-ma has to do a ewwand so off dey go and litta Heidi still in de car. When dey come home again, Gwandma go to de fwont door and call Heidi fwom dere. Heidi always wun to Gwand-ma when she call so when Gwand-ma call, Heidi nearly jump out and wun to her but she wemember dat she do not want to get out of dat car so she stay dere but my Mummy got hold of her fwont paws and pulls her out. Den she wun away and do not want my Mummy to cuddle her.

Bernie go and say to litta Heidi "Why you do not get out of dat car when we get home, litta Heidi?"
Litta Heidi say "Me wantth to thtay in the car coth it nithe and warm in there and me wantth to go for lotth more tat-tath. It good fun driving in the car. Me liketh that very much."
Maybe my Mummy and my Gwand-ma will take litta Heidi for tat-tas sometimes.

Luv fwom Happy now Bernie.

Monday, 13 June 2011

Pwoblems fwom mousies

Today Bernie was makin a nearly gonna be sick noise so my Mummy got a piece of paper to catch dat on.
Den she have a look and she see dat Bernie got litta fings in his tummy wot come out when he be sick.
Gwand-ma look up on dat internet and find out dat dem little wiggly fings gets in a pussy cat tummy fwom eatin mousies.
OH No!
Bernie had his medicine so dem don't get in his tummy but now dem is got dere and Bernie feelin yukkie.
Soon we goes to see my Unca Jim wot is de vet and my Mummy get me some dood medicine so dem goes away again.
We bwing litta Heidi too cos she been eatin dem norty mousies too.
Oh Dear Oh Dear.
Bernie is so sad.
Wuv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 7 June 2011

Bum Washin

Some peoples asked Bernie why do Bernie wash his bum.
Dat is a silly question cos evewybody wash deir bum. Evewybody wash all over deirself to keep nice and clean.
Pussy cats likes to be nice and clean so we wash all over too.
Soon me get a camewa fwom my Gwand-ma or my Mummy and me take pikchas of evewybody wot wash deir bum.
Just wait and soon dem pikchas be here.
Wuv fwom Bernie.

Sunday, 5 June 2011

Bernie's happy time

Bernie had a vewy happy time cos his Aunty Lily came to bisit.
First Gwand-ma say "Bernie your Aunty Lily is going to come and visit soon" so Bernie wun out de back door to look for her.
Dat because last time she come to bisit she come in de back gate.
But Bernie's Aunty Lily not dere so he go and look for her.
Bernie wun down de lane to de main stweet and wait.
After a while he look down our stweet and he see Unca Tim's car at de fwont of our house so Bernie wun fast to our fwont door and say "Meow" vewy loud.
Gwand-ma come and open de door and say "Bernie look who is here"
My Aunty Lily call out "Bernie" and stwaight away Bernie wun to see her and she gib Bernie a big cuddle.
Bernie is vewy vewy happy to see his Aunty Lily.
She give him lots of head scwatches and cuddles.
Den Bernie go and give litta Heidi a litta lick and evewyone say what a dood pussy cat Bernie is cos he takes care of litta Heidi.
Bernie so happy.
Wuv fwom Bernie.

Thursday, 2 June 2011

Night Watchcat Bernie

Hello to my dood fwends wot weads my blog.
Did you know dat Bernie is de night watchcat awound here?
Well Bernie is a vewy dood night watching cat.
My Mummy just say dat Bernie should not keep meowing at her bedwoom window and waking her up but she silly.
Bernie just making sure no mousies goes in her bedwoom window and anyway it is de night watchcat job to call out what time it is all night.
Wemember dat song "Past fwee o'clock and a cold fwosty mornin, past fwee o'clock, good mowwow masters all"
Well Bernie do dat all night.
Bernie just meow to tell evewybody wot time it be.
So I hope my Mummy learn to appweciate Bernie dood workin and takin care of her.
Wuv fwom Bernie.

Wednesday, 1 June 2011

Busy in de night

Hello Evewybody,
My Gwand-ma keep saying "Why don't you write a blog entry, Mr Bern?"
Well Bernie has been vewy busy evewy night. Me been goin out to chase mousies. Den when me come home in de mornin, me vewy tired and me goes to sleep on de lounge all day.
So last night Bernie had a WNO. Dat is a wostered night off. Me sleep all night and now me sneak into Gwand-ma study while she cleanin up in anuvver part of de house and me can wite my blog.
So now you knows why Bernie did not wite a blog for a few days.
My Mummy tell me a vewy happy fing.
My Aunty Lily comes to bisit. Bernie loves his Aunty Lily. She give him big cuddles altho she only litta she can still give big cuddles to Bernie.
Heidi was a dood pussy cat and she take all her tablets and her ointment and now her eye is better again.
Hmmm dat weminds me. It is a long time since Bernie got a dood cuddle fwom Heidi. Bernie go now and find Heidi for a cuddle. Us pussy cats likes cuddles so sometimes we has a cuddle ourselles.
Wuv fwom Bernie.

Friday, 27 May 2011

Dis mousie fing

Oh dear dere is mousies evewywhere.
Gwand-ma put a gwey fing on de floor wif peanut butter in it.
It vewy dood. It catch a mousie for Bernie and Bernie just have to go and eat it. Bernie do not even have to chase it.
It taste nice like sartay.
Heidi had dood fun playin wif a mousie today outside but she let it go away when she sick of playin wif it.
Den Bernie was playin wif anuvver mousie inside de lounge woom and Gwand-ma put her foot on it to stop it wunning away and she nearly bwoke it so Bernie just bite it hard and den it dead. Bernie do not want to eat sumfing wot sumone stepped on.
Gwand-ma say we should not let litta mousies suffer.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 26 May 2011

Dat why mousies taste dood

Gwand-da say he fink dose mousies eat some pussy cat din dins.
Bernie say "Oh dem is NORTY MOUSIES' Dem is not allowed to eat pussy cat dindins.
So Bernie catch dem and eat dem up. Dey got pussy cat din dins inside dem. Dat why dem taste so dood.
Hmmph! Bernie eat two of dem last night. Well me did not finish eatin bofe of dem cos me tummy full up but me catch and eat any more mousies wot eats pussy cats din dins.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 25 May 2011

Heidi got a sore eye.

Today my Mummy bwing litta Heidi to see Unca Jim wot is de vet.
Heidi got a sore eye.
My Mummy baved it wif salty water an it get a bit better but she take litta Heidi to de vet just to make sure she be OK.
Now she got ointment and medicine to take.
Unca Jim say Heidi beed in a fight and got a sore eye.
It got infected.
Poor Litta Heidi. Bernie give her cuddles.
Luv fwom Bernie again.

Mousies again

Dere be so many mousies here dat Heidi an Bernie finks it is dood fun.
Bernie catched a mousie and bwing him inside and eat him all up. Him taste vewy nice so Bernie fink "Hmmm dat taste nice. Me go and get a second helping" so me go and find annuvver mousie.
Me come wunning inside wif dat new mousie in my mouf and twying to tell Gwand-ma dat Bernie got annuvver mousie wif my mouf closed.
It vewy hard to cawwy a mousie in de mouf and say meow at dat same time. Me was talkin out de side of my mouf.
Bernie bwing dat mousie in and put him down so me can say Meow to Gwand-ma and dat silly mousie start wunning away. Bernie keep catchin it but it get away.
Now me need to go and get annuvver mousie!!
Wuv fwom Bernie

Monday, 23 May 2011

Evewybody is at home now

Hello to my dood weaders.

Bernie and Heidi is happy pussy cats now cos evewybody is home now.

We can get lots of cuddles now.

Heidi catched a mousie last night but me did not see if she eat it or if it wun away. Me ask Heidi but she do not tell me. Maybe it is a sekwet.

Dat norty fing wot got de punkins now got de Vincas which is pwetty flowows dat Bernie like vewy much. Now dem all is gone gwey and howwidable.

My Mummy say dat Jack Fwost got dem. Gwand-da watch Jack Fwost on de telebishion. How he jump outa dat telebishion and got our punkins and Vincas?

Dat is a mystewy. Bernie find a pwitty pikcha of dose Vincas.

Luv fwom Bernie.

Sunday, 22 May 2011

Lookin for my Mummy and my Gwand-ma

Evewy night Bernie go out and looks for his Mummy and his Gwand-ma.
Bernie want dem to comes home cos Heidi got a sore eye and she might need to go to dat vet.
Bernie look all night and den he come home and he vewy tired so he goes to sleep on his Mummy bed. Bernie cwying and cwying.
Oh where is my Mummy?
and where is my Gwand-ma?
Me loves Gwand-da. He be a vewy dood Gwand-da but him go to work evewy day and he cant stay home wif Bernie and Heidi.
We is sad pussy cats.
If anybody sees my Mummy and my Gwand-ma, please tell dem to comes home.
Wuv fwom Bernie.

Thursday, 19 May 2011


Hello to my dood fwends
Bernie usin Gwand-da 'puter again acause Gwand-ma is away bisiting my cousin Polly Pussy Cat and she turn her 'puter off. Bernie do not know how to turn a 'puter on so he wait until sumone using deir 'puter and goes into a diffwent woom and den he use dat 'puter to do his blog.
Now Bernie use Gwand-da 'puter. Gwand-da say dat OK.
Bernie and Heidi is vewy wowwied about dose Punkins.
Dey gwowd all over dat backyard wif big big leaves and now dose leaves goin gwey.
Bernie and Heidi do not know why dem punkins leaves goes gwey.
We hopes my Mummy do not fink Bernie and Heidi make dem go gwey cos we did not make dem go gwey.
Why is dat? Dem look vewy funny gone all gwey.
Also dere is a new white pussy cat living somewhere near here. It is a cute pussy cat but me do not know what it name is yet.
My Gwand-da sumtimes do not feel so dood lately. He be vewy glad when my Gwand-ma and my Mummy comes home.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 16 May 2011

Heidi catchin more mousies

In de middle of de night, Bernie hear a fast wunning noise. Bernie was sleepin on his Mummy bed but dat fast wunnin noise wake him up. Bernie goes to see what makin dat noise and he sees dat Heidi comes wunning in vewy fast.
She see a mousie. It wun into Gwand-da bed woom and den into Gwand-da barf woom. She chasin it vewy fast.
Bernie watchin her and so is Gwand-da. She is such a vewy vewy clever mousie catchin pussy cat.
Bernie vewy pwoud of her. Bernie teached Heidi how to catch mousies. Now she can catch dem dood.
She catch dat naughty mousie and she eat him up.
Her Unca Bernie (dat's me) is vewy pwoud of litta Heidi cos she so dood.
Wuv fwom Bernie

Had to find a 'puter

Hi to evewybody wot wead Bernie's blog.
Gwand-ma and My Mummy has gone away sumwhere.
Dey went yesserdayyesserdayyesserdayyesserday.
Bernie and Heidi know sumfing happenin acause dey getting lots of fings and put dem in bags and put dem in de car.
Bernie know dat means dey go sumwhere.
Bernie do not like it when his Gwand-ma and his Mummy goes away so Bernie twy to sit on dat bag so his Mummy can't get it but she pick it up wif Bernie on it and bwing it out to de car and Bernie do not like dat.
Bernie hate goin in de car, so Bernie jump out.
Poor litta Heidi was fwightened. She do not know what is happenin and she sit dere on top of de garbage bin and watch wif big fwightened eyes.
Gwand-ma say dat Gwand-da stay home so he take care of us pussy cats.
We glad about dat.
Den dey go away and we vewy sad.
We gone inside and den Bernie see dat Gwand-ma turn off her 'puter so how can Bernie do a blog?
Bernie vewy busy lookin after litta Heidi but after a while she not fwightened any more cos Gwand-da come home and give us cuddles.
Den Bernie see dat Gwand-da leave him puter on so Bernie sit and look at it for a long time and now he find out how to wite on Gwand-da 'puter so now he do a blog.
Bernie is a vewy clever pussy cat.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 9 May 2011

Sumting funny

Hee hee, Bernie is stilling larfing about sumting funny dat happen yesserday when litta Heidi catchin dem mousies.
She wun awound de lawn and chase dem.
Den she twy and sit on dem to squash dem cos she is a famous mousie squashing pussy cat, but she do not stay sitting on dem for long.
Bernie ask her later why she do not stay sitting on dem for very long and she say "Well uthually me thquathh them inthide my blankie but when me thit of them they tickleth my tummy tho me cannot thtay thitting on them for very long."
Bernie fink dat vewy funny.
Dat is de twials and twibulations of a mousie squashing pussy cat.
Wuv fwom Bernie.

Sunday, 8 May 2011

Fwee mousies

Today Heidi catch fwee mousies. She catch dem outside in de back yard.
De first one wun away.
Next time she catch one she eat it up quick as quick so it dont wun away.
Den de next one she catch, she bwing it inside de house.
Evewybody was outside doin de gardening and Gwand-ma wun inside and say "Heidi bring that mouse outside" So good litta Heidi pick it up in her mouth and she wun outside wif it. Aftyer a while it dead and wont play anymore so she eat it up too.
Heidi litta tummy will be full up wif mousies.
She do not want any din dins tonight.
Luv fwom Bernie

Friday, 6 May 2011

Mousie playg

Hello dere to all my fwends
My Mummy say dat it be a mousie playg. Dat why dere is lots and lots of mousies awound.
She say dat we need to find a pied piper and den dey will go away.
Bernie go to litta Heidi and say "Litta Heidi, does you know what a pied piper is?"
Heidi say "No me doeth not know what that ith."
"Hmmm" says me. "Me knows what a pipe is and me knows what a pie is but me do not know what dem makes when dem is stuck togevver"
"Oh" says litta Heidi, "What ith a pipe?"
So Bernie bwing her down to de back yard where we got some old pipe lying on de gwound fwom when a man fix de gutters.
Bernie say "Dat is a pipe" and Heidi say "Oh Ith that what a pipe lookth like?" and Bernie say "Yes litta Heidi. But how could it be pied?"
Heidi say "Me remember when Grand-ma make a apple pie and me thought it wath the moon coth it round and yellow"
"Yes" says Bernie, "dat is wot a pie look like."
So now we is twying to work out how to put dem togevver to make a pied piper to get wid of de mousies playg.
Wuv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 4 May 2011

Still sick

Bernie do dat BLECH again today but Gwand-ma say it mainly a fur ball. My Mummy has to bwush me lots and lots to get all de extwa fur out so Bernie do not swallow it when he wash hisself.
Dat be de main weason pussy cats has to bomit up fur balls.
Bernie catched a mousie dis morning but when me bwing it inside and put it down, it wun away.
Heidi come and twy to help me catch it but it wun fast and den my Mummy let it go out de door.
Now Bernie is a bit cwanky wif his Mummy. She not supposed to do dat.
Well me go and twy to find it again now.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 2 May 2011

Bernie be sick again

Oh dear! Bernie be sick again. He bomit yesserday and today. Me might need to go back and see Unca Jim wot is my dood fwend de vet.
Bernie had some medicine wot he take and it make him a bit better for a while but now he sick again. Dat one of de weasons why he do not feel like chasin mousies.
Hee Hee. Do you know what? Yesserday in de night time, Bernie was outside and my Mummy say to Heidi, "You go and find Bernie and bring him inside" and litta heidi come and find me and she say "Unca Bernie, your Mummy wantth you to come inthide" and so we bofe go to de door togevver and Bernie say "miaow" cos he got de loudest miaow and den my Gwand-ma open de door and she say "Oh you are good pussy cats to come in like Bernie's Mummy said you must"
We are bofe vewy dood pussy cats.
Luv fwom Bernie
PS Me do not give licks when me is feelin a bit sick.

Sunday, 1 May 2011

Dat where my dood fur gone

My Gwand-ma spill a cup of tea on her 'puter keyboard. Just when Bernie wanted to do a blog.
It wecked!
Gwand-da has to lend her a keyboard fwom his office so Bernie can do his blog. Den tomowwow she go and buy a new one.
My Mummy twy and fix it for her but you know what? She find it full of Bernie's dood fur. Bernie was wonderin where dat fur gone. Dat might be de fur off de back off his neck. Bernie neck is cold now cos dat fur got out and went in de keyboard.
I hope my Mummy can get me some more fur.
Also, my Katy got a blog but Bernie cannot wead it and Bernie want to wead it and tell her how dood it is cos she wead Bernie blog.
Oh well!
Wuv fwom Bernie.

Saturday, 30 April 2011

Woyal Wedding

Last night we watch dat woyal wedding on de telebishun.
Dose peoples do not look like dose knitting patterns and dose corgis was not at it.
But dere be lots of horsies. When dey do dat knitting pattern of de woyal wedding wot my Mummy find, dey do not do patterns for dose horsies.
So me fink dat knitting pattern was silly.
Bernie like de litta flower girls best.
Wuv fwom Bernie
PS licks for Hughie if he like dem. WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

A west today

Today Bernie take a west fwom all dat mousie chasing.
My Gwand-ma always fwow de mousies in de bin anyway so Bernie fink she do not want dem.
Evewybody say dat Bernie is a vewy dood pussy for catchin dose mousies but den dey fwow dem away. Bernie cannot unnerstand people sumtimes.
Why do dey be glad when Bernie catch a mousie and den fwow it away?
It be a big mystewy.
So Bernie do not catch any today and we see what dey say.
Wuv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 28 April 2011

And anuvver one

Hi dere,
Yes you got it! Bernie catch anuvver mousie again today.
Dis time it was a litta one and Bernie just bite it head off and leave it in de fwont hall cos evewybody was not home. Den my Gwand-ma come home first and she say "Oh Bernie you caught another mouse! You are catching one every day!"
Then she get a tissue and pick it up and put it in de garbage bin outside.
Dis is vewy confusing.
First lots of peoples was talkin about how dey got lots of mousies in dere house.
My Gwand-ma was saying "We don't seem to have any mice at all"
So Bernie fink "Dat not fair. Evewybody got mousies exceot my poor Gwand-ma" so Bernie been goin wound and findin mousies and bwinging dem home for Gwandma and my Mummy and den dey always fwow dem away in de garbage.
So now Bernie has to go and get anuvver one evewy day.
Bernie gettin vewy tired fwom all dis mouse catchin.
Wuv fwom overworked Bernie.

Wednesday, 27 April 2011

More Mousie

Bernie catch anuvver mousie early dis morning but he don't eat him dis time.
Bernie just bite a few bits off and den Gwand-da fwow him in de garbage.
My Mummy wowwy dat sumtimes de mousies might be poisoned if some of de neighbours put poison for dem and if Bernie or Heidi eat a poison mousie we get sick.
Gwand-ma go and ask de neighbours but none of dem puts poison for de mousies cos dey all got pussy cats and puppy dogs.
So we is safe.
We keep catchin dose mousies cos dem is dirty vermin. Dem do poos all over de place and makes people get sick fwom deir germs so us pussy cats catch dem and get wid of dem and keep our peoples safe.
Wuv fwom Bernie.

Tuesday, 26 April 2011

Anuvver mousie

Bernie catch anuvver mousie but he outside.
Bernie bwing him in and show his Mummy den Bernie eat him all up except for de tail. Dat tail was too tough to chew.
Bernie Mummy say dat Bernie is a dood mouse catchin Bernie.
Wuv fwom Bernie

Sunday, 24 April 2011

Ah! Got dat mousie!

My Gwand-da and my Mummy and my Gwand-ma gone somewhere so dis house nice and quiet wifout dose noisy peoples.
Bernie sit quietly in fwont of de stove and soon out comes dat mousie!
Bernie catch him quick and bite him head off.
Den Bernie leave him in de fwont hallway so my Mummy see him when she come home.
Soon dem all come home and stwaight away my Mummy see dat mousie wifout a head.
My Mummy say "Oh Bernie caught the mouse!. You are such a good Bernie" and she get dat mousie and fwow him in de garbage bin.
Den she give Bernie some of dose speshul tweats for pussy cats what she buy sometimes.
Dat cos Bernie so good and catch dat mousie.
Now Bernie goes to sit on his Mummy lap and have a sheshul cuddle cos him likes to have speshul cuddles.
Luv fwom Bernie

Bernie might be gettin better

Hello evewybody,
Bernie did not bomit for a few days so he might be gettin better.
Me hopes so cos me does not like dat bom it.
Wuv fwom Bernie

Bov ver

Bernie was sitting dere vewy quiet in fwont of de stove while evewyone in bed.
Bernie sittin dere watchin for dat mousie.
Bernie do not go to sleep on de lounge like he usually do in de night.
He sit in fwont of de stove waitin pashently for dat mousie.
Den Gwandma come out and make a noise.
Bov ver!
Jus when dat mousie was nearly goin to come out.
I hopes Gwandma huwwy up and have her dwink and go back to bed so Bernie can sit dere quietly in fwont of de stove again and wait for dat mousie.

Saturday, 23 April 2011


Please evewybody bees vewy quiet.
Dere is a mousie under de stove.
Bernie sittin here waitin for it to come out and den he catch it quick.
We must be vewy still and quiet so it don't know dere is a big pussy cat waitin dere for it.
Luv fwom Bernie.

Friday, 22 April 2011

Heidi is de clever mousie squasher

Hi dere to my nice blog weaders.
Today we find anuvver mousie near where Heidi sleeps. It was squashed.
Dat is what Heidi do wif mousies.
She let dem get in her blankie and den she squash dem.
Dey be flat mousies.
Wemember how she had a Heidi'th thuper thpeedy thmall trethpather thquathhing thervithe?
Well she is still goin at it.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 21 April 2011

Bernie still might be a bit sick

Hello to my bootiful blog weaders.
Bernie finished all his medicines but he still be a bit sick and his din dins comes out again.
Bernie be vewy good and ty not to let it get on carpet. Den it easy for someone to clean up.
Bernie feel funny in his tummy.
We wait and see if Bernie still doing dat and if he still doing dat, my Gwand-ma take me back to see Unca Jim who is my dood fwend de vet.
(But him scales is bwoke)
My Mummy say dat she glad dat Bernie has a speshul Medipet insuwance and so if it cost too much we claim it back like Medicare.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 12 April 2011

Just a note

Hullo fwom sick yukky Bernie
Bernie got a sick like his Gwand-ma but Bernie got medicine and so soon he be dood again.
Gwand-ma and me catch it off each uvver.
Bernie wite a better email when he get better.
Wuv fwom Bernie

Monday, 11 April 2011

A Shocking Discovewy‏

Hello to my dood fwends
Bernie is a bit sick. He beed yukking up his dindins. He can't help it.
Gwand-ma take him to see Unca Jim who is de vet.
Unca Jim is a vewy nice man and he say Bernie must twy taking some medicines to see if dat make him better.
But - a shocking dweadful fing happen.
Unca Jim put Bernie on his scales and his scales must be bwoke cause even tho Bernie was sittin down pwoperly, he still weigh heavy.
Now we all know dat Bernie pwove when he sit down he do not weigh so much so dose scales must be bwoke.
Let dis be a warning to all de pussy cats and puppy dogs wot goes to see Unca Jim.
Unca Jim's scales is bwoke.
Do not twust dem.
Lots of Love fwom Bernie.