Sunday, 30 March 2014

Gwand-da is in de hospital

My Gwand-da keep being a sick Gwand-da and him stay in bed for lots of days. Bernie go into him bedwoom and give him a cuddle sometimes.
Today Gwand-ma wing up de doctor and de doctor tell her to take Gwand-da to de hospital and dem will put a dwip in him.
How dey do dat?
Bernie have been looking at a dwip from a tap and me do not know how dat go in someone. Maybe Gwand-da sit under it wif him mouf open.
Come home Gwand-da. You can sit under de tap here wif a dwip. Bernie will still give you cuddles. Me does not worry about a person sitting under a tap wif a dwip.
Just do not get dat dwip on Bernie.
Now me just wun up to de hospital and tell my Gwand-da him can come home.
Luv fwom Bernie

Tuesday, 25 March 2014

A Intewesting question

My Hughie ask a vewy interwesting question. Him say "was it waining before and Bernie do not notice?"
Dis what Bernie has to say about dat.
It was not waining before for a long time. Bernie always goes outside to check on fings. First me go out de fwont door and den me walk all awound de house and come in de laundwy door. Dat my important job to take care of evewyfing. So dat how Bernie know dat it did not wain before de wainbow only after.
Good gwief. Soon we will be back to Katy birfday and she be 8 again. What we going to do?
Bernie will have to send a speshul email to my Mummy to ask her to put dat wainbow pikcha on Bernie blog so we can see if it a inside out wainbow.

From Bernie's Mummy
Here you are my darlings. The rainbow

Thursday, 20 March 2014

De sky is back to fwont

Sumfing vewy stwange happen today.
It happen in de evening when my Mummy came home fwom school.
It was still de daytime and my Mummy looked outside and she see a bootiful wainbow. It be de best wainbow she ever see. She get her phone and she take a dood pikcha of it.
Hmmm Bernie will ask my Mummy to put dat pikcha on Bernie blog.
Den guess what happen!!
My Mummy go to plant some baby plants what she buy. Dem is silver beet, and beetwoot and onions and sum uvver fings.
Den when she nearly finished it start to wain.
Dat silly! Dat back to fwont!
De wainbow is supposed to come after de wain not before it.
How come dat happen?
Luv fwom Bernie.

Tuesday, 18 March 2014

Just me and Gwand-da today - and Jaffa

Today my Mummy and my Gwand-ma go to Wagga so it just be me and my Gwand-da at home.
We send Jaffa outside to play and me and my Gwand-da has a nice cuddle on him desk and we talks about boy fings.
It vewy nice to have a dood day wif my Gwand-da.
Den dem girls comes home and Gwand-da say him needs to turn over de page on dat noospaper so Bernie has to get up and move out of de way.
Dat a noosance. Maybe dat is a girl noospaper.
Jaffa say "What was you talking to our Grand-da about?" and Bernie say "Me cannot tell you cos it sekwet boys stuff". Jaffa say "Oh well me and Mummy and Grand-ma talks about secret girls things and they are much better than secret boys things"
Hmmm dat silly. How do she know dat? Bernie needs to fink about dat but me can't tell you cos dat a sekwet.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 17 March 2014

Message from Blog Police

Bernie got a message fwom de Blog Police.
Dem say dere be too much bum sniffing and farting in dis blog.
Hmmph! You silly ning-com-poops!
Me is a pussy cat and dat wot pussy cats does.
Go away. You Blog Police is not allowed to wead Bernie blog.
Luv fwom Bernie to all my dood weaders not to dem silly Blog Police.

Sunday, 16 March 2014

Evewybody busy except Bernie

Today evewybody was busy doing sumfing. My Mummy was doing school work. My Gwand-da and my Gwand-ma was twying to make a little fence to go awound our Sweet peas Garden because tomowwow be St. Patwick's Day and dat is de day wot you has to plant Sweet peas.
Even Jaffa was helping dem. When dem dig a hole, Jaffa fill it in or do a wee to make dat gwound good for de new plants. She chase away fings and wun awound and see if dat fence is stwaight. Gwand-ma come inside and she say "Bernie why aren't you helping us too?"
Bernie just wait inside until someone goes near de fwidge cos me know dere be chooky in dat fwidge.
Oh well me suppose me can help.
So Bernie go outside and sit dere and make sure evewybody doing it wight.
Just as well cos maybe it do not get done wight if Bernie do not go and see.
Jaffa just digs holes evewywhere wot we do not need holes and she go wound and smell some new little plants wot Gwand-ma put in yesserday. Den she go and smell Bernie bum. Why she do dat? Wot my bum got to do wif it?
Hmmmph! Next time she do dat, Bernie fart at her.
Luv fwom Bernie

Thursday, 13 March 2014

Jaffa has a new dood hobby

Today Gwand-ma was cleaning de family woom floor and Gwand-da come to help her. Dem lift up de carpet in de family woom and dem find lots of little squashed lizards what Jaffa catch. She get dem in de garden and bwing dem in de family woom and den dem little lizards wuns under de carpet to hide fwom her and dem get squashed.
She have five in dere.
She say "Oh is that where my little lizzies went? I was looking for them."
My Mummy fink Jaffa must be welated to dat Heidi pussy cat what used to live here because she used to squash mousies.
Jaffa had nearly enough to make a lizard pie.
Luv fwom Bernie

Wednesday, 12 March 2014

Today is Katy Birfday

Today is Katy birfday. My Gwand-ma make a cake and she put nine candles on it so Bernie can see how old Katy is.
She bwing dat cake outside to de back patio where Bernie was having a little sleep.
Den she put it on de gwound so Bernie can see it. Bernie wanted to taste it but a fwend what was visiting called Aunty Sam get hold of Bernie so me cannot eat it.
Dat do not matter. Me do not like chocolate cake. But dem candles is vewy pwetty. Nine is a pwetty how old to be.

Tuesday, 11 March 2014

Happy Birfday to my Katy

My Katy has her birfday tomowwow and she be nine years old.
She is gwowing up and soon she turns into a gwowd up lady.
Bernie wants to go and visit my Katy for her birfday and have a dood birfday party wif her. Do she have nice chooky to eat at her birfday party? Bernie loves to eat chooky. It is de best din dins in de world.
My Katy lives too far away and me cannot go and visit her so we has to send our messages on de  'puter.
Bernie will tell Jaffa all about Katy birfday and we will have a little party here and we will sing happy birfday to Katy. Bernie will tell my Mummy to light nine candles so we can see how old she is.
Lots of love to de birfday girl fwom her best pussy cat fwend in de whole world. Dat best pussy cat fwend is Bernie.
luvs and licks
licks and MIAOW (what means Happy birfday.)
Luvs fwom Bernie

Friday, 7 March 2014

Bernie still getting skinny

Evewy Fwiday my Gwand-ma put Bernie in de blue cat basket and den she put dat cat basket wif Bernie in it onto de scales in de barfwoom. Den she see what it say and she do a little  take away sum and take away 2 fwom what de scales say and dat how much Bernie weigh now.
Now me is 5.9 kgs and me was 7.1 last year.  Bernie is getting to be a skinny cat.
Now my Gwand-ma always wowwied dat Bernie might be sick and dat why me getting skinny.
Bernie do not feel sick.
Today my Gwand-da went to de hospital and had a little operwation and comed home. Him is OK.
My Mummy is getting a little bit better. Bernie likes to hear him Mummy doing little giggles and talkins instead of cwyins.
Luv fwom Bernie

Monday, 3 March 2014

Now me can do blogs

Now Bernie can do blogs.
Me just has to use Internet Explorwer not Kwome. Kwome have gone silly and it do not let Bernie do blogs.
My Mummy is a bit sick lately and Bernie is vewy wowwied about her. Bernie told Jaffa dat we has to give her lots of cuddles but Jaffa wan away and she do not come inside until it dark.
Jaffa was a norty pussy cat.
De uvver day Jaffa had a little wiggling sumfing in her mouf. Gwand-da say "What has you got Jaffa? Is it a birdie?" and Gwand-ma look and she say "I think it might be a mouse" Then it get out of Jaffa's mouf and it were a fwog. It was not a skweaming fwog. It was a jumping lots and lots fwog.
Gwand-ma catch it in a jar and den Gwand-da put it outside in de garden and it sitting out dere cwoaking.
Little Jaffa do not hurt dat fwog. She cawwy it in her mouf just like a Mummy Pussy cat cawwy her little babies.
When Gwand-da put it outside Jaffa be vewy sad. She say to Bernie "Where is my little kitten gone?" Bernie say "Dat was not a kitten. Dat was a fwoggie" Jaffa say "Oh is dat why it do not have any fur?  I wanted to have a little baby to look after. Maybe I can find one at the vet?" But Bernie say "No we got enough pussy cats here. You have to play with your toy mousies. Maybe Mummy will get you a toy pussy cat with fur that you can lick"
Luv fwom Bernie