Clever Mummy

Today my clever and bootfiful Mummy wemember where she put some nice chookie so Bernie allowed to have some.
Me so glad me got such a luvly Mummy.
Den tonight a norty bad owange cat come and fight wif Bernie. It a big tiger cos it vewy big.
Bernie fight and fight cos dis is Bernie house and dat big owange cat not allowed to come here.
Den my Mummy come and tell it to go away and do not hurt Bernie and den she give Bernie a big cuddle.
Luv fwom Bernie

A vewy boooowing day

Today is a vewy boring day. First evewybody go away somewhere. Den dey come home and Aunty Mavis come. Den dey just sitting dere talking and talking and talking.
And me wondewing how come Gwand-da fink little Bernie talk a lot..
Me had a sleep on Gwand-ma lap for a little while.
Den my Mummy and my Gwand-ma go to the shops and dey supposed to get chookie for Bernie but now dem come home and dey do not get it.
Dem is soooo forgetful.
Hmmmm Me has to send dem a email and wemind dem.
Dat might work
Me send a email to say "Buy lots of chookie for Bernie"
Or maybe me can find out how to buy dat chookie on line.
But me need to find out de password for de Paypal account.
Oh dear dat a pwoblem. Bernie does not have a cwedit card or a paypal account.
Bernie does not even have any money.
Oh no .
How me going to get some nice chookie to eat?
Luv fwom cwanky Bernie

OH no it boil over

Whenever someone put some fing on de stove to cook, Bernie sit dere and watch it. Me dood at dat.
Tonight my Gwand-ma put some fings on de stove to boil and she gone away but Bernie was sound asleep on Aunty Kim's new Pussy cat tea towels and me did not know it boiled over until my Mummy went and saw it.
Oh No! Bernie should be watching it.
But we all helped to clean it up.
Gwand-ma was boiling de dish cloffs to clean dem.
Wow  we got bootiful new two lips in our garden.
Luv fwom Bernie

More chookie

My Gwand-da buy anuvver chookie and Bernie can smell it but nobody will let Bernie eat it.
Oh Miaow ow ow ngow.
Dat exactly de fing what Bernie say when he wishes someone would give him some of dat chookie.
Dis morning Aunty Mavis come and visit but Bernie do not get a cuddle. Me forgot.
Dis afternoon we all go out to do fwont garden and weed one of de pwetty gardens. Den we put stuff on it to stop more weeds gwowing. Me do not know how de weeds know dat dem is not supposed to gwow dere when dat stuff on it. It look like dwy gwass.
Now my Mummy gone somewhere and we not allowed to have dindins til she come home. Bernie stand at dat fwont door and miaow weal loud to call her home so we can have dindins and Bernie can have some chookie but she do not come.
Luv fwom hungwy Bernie

Dat wobber came again

Dat norty wobber what eat all our chicken came again.
Bernie was sitting near de fwidge asking for some chicken for a little snack and Gwand-da looked in de fwidge and dere was no chicken in dere.
Gwand-da say "There is no chicken in there! The naughty robber must have come and eaten it all again. Look Bernie!" and Gwand-da pick Bernie up and show him in de fwidge. It twue. Dere was no chicken in de fwidge. Me wish me could catch dat norty wobber and bite him on de bum.
My Aunty Kim came to visit.  Bernie was sitting outside on de back patio and Bernie wanted to come in de door. Evewybody tell Bernie to go in de cat door. Dat embawwassing! Bernie do not want his Aunty Kim to see him coming in de cat door.  Bernie wait until she not looking den me sneak in de cat door. Den me go to my Aunty Kim for a cuddle.
Den me sneak out de cat door and wait at de door again so Aunty Kim will not n otice dat bernie must have come in de cat door.
Den me go wound to my Mummy bedwoom and go in de door at her woom. Bernie is allowed to go in dat door cos dat is Bernie woom too.
Now my Gwand-0da is going to get lots of chinese dindins for us tonight. Bernie like chinese dindins like his Aunty Lily. Bernie is soon going to learn how to use chopsticks.
Luv fwom Bernie'

Nearly locked in de shower

Bernie likes to lick some water fwom de floor in de shower when someone has finsihed having deir shower.
Gwand-da had a shower and him leave lots of nice water on de floor so Gwand-ma let Bernie go in de shower and lick some of dat water.  BUT de door slam shut. Gwand-ma was cleanin her tooths so Bernie had to wait until she finished  before she open dat door and let bernie out.
Phew! Dat was close. Me did not want to get left in dat shower all day while my Gwand-da and my Gwand-ma goes to Wagga to take my Gwand-da to de hospital and while my Mummy gone to school.
Me was a vewy wowwied pussy cat.
We got some more pwetty flowows coming in our garden. First we got lots of  dem little blue flowows called gwape higher sins and den we got lots of yellow flowows called daffy dillys and now we getting wed flowows called two lips.
Oh and me forgot. We gots hundweds of dem bootiful little flowows called pansies.
We is getting a vewy pwetty garden.
Luv fwom Bernie

It vewy embawwassing

Oh No! A sticky label come off de peanut butter and stick on Bernie tail.
Bernie walking awound wif dat Peanut butter sticky label stuck to my bootiful tail.
Evewybody laugh and say "Ooh here comes the peanut butter"
Gwand-ma say "Come here peanut butter. I want to spread you on my toast"
Bernie say Miaowow" what means "I am not peanut butter. I am just a pussy cat called Bernie"
Den Gwand-da say "Have you got any vegemite?" and he twy to put Bernie back in de pantwy. But Bernie say "Oh Miaow miaow. Please do not be mean to Bernie"
But den my Mummy come and say "Oh Bernie you have a label stuck on your tail like a flag" and she get it off for Bernie so peoples do not fink Bernie is de peanut butter.
Luv fwom Bernie