Investigations into da disappeawance of Oscar, da famous Wadio Station Galah is continuing.
We thank my dear litta fwend Heidi for da latest clue.
She climbed up onto da fwidge and she waited for Chicken man to come on da wadio.
She wanted to catch him and eat him for Din dins.
I told her dat Chicken Man would be too much for her to eat on her own so she was planning to get all the gang to come over and help her. Then she said to me"Wow Miaow Unca Bernie. Here ith a very dood clue. Who do we know who ith a clever birdie wot talkth on the wadio? Juth like Chicken Man? Maybe Chicken man ith weally Othcar. Or maybe Othcar ith Chicken man? Maybe Othcar have a thekwet identity and maybe he got kidnapped by thome of those cwookth what he twieth to catch."
Bernie told litta Heidi dat she a bewy cleber pussy cat an we corled a meetin of our committee. They all agweed dat Heidi might be onto somefing and she a bewy cleber pussy cat. Den dey all say now when we going to catch dat Chicken man and eat him up for din dins?
Bernie say "You musn't eat him up cos he might be Oscar" Dey all got a bit cwanky den so we stop having dat meetin while we fink of wot to do next.
Den we decide to wait an see if we dets a wansom note. If some cwooks kidnap Oscar, they might send a wansom note.
We all gone home and we pwomise to look for wansom notes. Unfortunately one of de girl pussy cats from down DeBoos stweet went to da bet de uvver day cos she was feelin a bit sick. Dat vet say to her "Wot wong wif you ol girl?" Da pussy cat say "I dot fleas and I dot sore leg and I dot fur cumin out and I gets hot an cold and I don't feel like eatin my dindins any more and I got little legs stickin out ebbywhere. Lots of little legs."Dat vet say " Dont you worry any more my girl. You just got menny paws."
Wuv fwom Bernie
Dear Bernard,
ReplyDeleteI am immensely glad that my Small People didn't understand that joke, since it means they didn't experience the same pain. If only I shared their blissful ignorance.
Your step-uncle.